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07.23.20, 10:55 AM #1
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Interesting Patty Smyth Interview (Today)
Sorry if this should be in Random Shit, but I don't think so. I think this one qualifies. There's one part that's pretty fucking crazy. I saw it and was like, "Uh...okay?" See if you notice:
https://www.stereogum.com/2092218/pa...tracking-down/
SMYTH: I thought that was cool. I’m not trying to be a cool mom, I’m trying to be a mom-mom, but I guess I have one of the cooler jobs.
STEREOGUM: Yeah, not every mom has been asked to join Van Halen! Speaking of being a parent, I feel like COVID has reignited a conversation about work-life balance — or a total lack thereof — especially for mothers. You mentioned earlier that your record label wasn’t overjoyed at your becoming pregnant in the late ‘90s. I bet that you never would have had to worry about what a work-life balance looked like as a working musician if you were a man. What was that like to navigate as a working, single parent in the ’80s?
SMYTH: Oh my god, don’t even get me started on that. When I started touring again, we were doing so great and we were killing — but because I’m married to John [McEnroe], literally every agent I talked to was like, “You don’t want to work, do you?” I was like, “Yeah, I want to work, man, that’s why I’m here.” They would never ask a guy that. They asked me that because I’m a woman, and what? Like, “Oh, I don’t have to work because my husband has money.” Back in my day, you didn’t go into music to make money, you went into music because you loved it and that’s what you needed to do.
I wasn’t thinking, “Oh wow, I’m going to get rich.” I just was like, “Wow, people really like the way I sing.” It was totally not a business move. Now it’s different, people are savvier, but I mean, I have never heard of anyone ask a guy, “You don’t need to work.” Like fucking Rod Stewart or Paul McCartney or [any] guy, it’s like shit turns to money — does anyone ever say, “You don’t need to work?” It’s just so weird.
For me, I’ve learned that you can have a child and that you can have a career but you have to have help. Your company, no matter who it is, has to be supportive and help you with that. Maybe you can’t have it all, but you can write songs, go on the road. And you just do it through the summer months, or whatever it is, or if you have a partner who can hang with your kids. Back then, especially the record labels, they didn’t give two shits. They weren’t going to help me work around it. I wasn’t a big enough star. Maybe if I was a huge star… I was doing well, but it wasn’t like I was Barbra Streisand, or something.
When I was pregnant the first time, it had an adverse effect on my career, although I still was able to come back and have the biggest records that I ever had. But still, I got a lot of pushback, I got a lot of judgment and criticism for it. But for me, I just know, this is the way that I’ve always been. And it has nothing to do with being a mom, it started long before that — that the people in my life, my family, my friends that I consider family, are what’s important to me. I love singing and writing; it’s my number one priority, but there have been times when I did step away for a minute. I had a terminally ill friend who I needed to spend time with because nobody else was and that’s something that I did. I took the time, I can step back, I just didn’t need to be doing it all the time and with this vicious drive. I think I’m a little bit different in that way but I’m not willing to sacrifice my kids for my career.
I don’t have to think about that now because [my kids are] grownups, but there was a moment when I had to choose — and I chose my kids. That’s what I had to do. At that point, as a single parent, I didn’t really have that and there wasn’t anyone else who could step in for me. My mom was helping me but my oldest daughter needed me, and so I was in Europe and I was supposed to go to Spain and [record] “Sometimes Love Just Ain’t Enough” in Spanish, and I felt like, “I can’t. I’m sorry, I have to go home.” So they were very upset with me, but I just had to do it, I couldn’t take another phone call from my kids. I don’t regret that at all.
STEREOGUM: How about when you were asked to join Van Halen? I’ve read that your decision not to replace David Lee Roth was partially to do with the fact that you were pregnant at the time but that it was more to do with your not being interested in the party-hard LA lifestyle.
SMYTH: They were heavy drinkers. I don’t drink. I never saw myself living in LA. I was like, “I’m from New York, we don’t move to LA.”
It’s all semantics because if [Eddie] had said to me, “Let’s make a record,” then I would have said yes to that. But joining the band — to me then, “Oh god, they fight all the time, him and his brother, and I don’t want to get into a volatile situation.” And I was probably heavily hormoned out because I was eight months pregnant, so there was a state of mind that I was in of how I need to take care of myself. But I regretted turning him down. For a long time I regretted it. When you start to have regrets, I was like, “Oh man I would’ve made so much money.”
I wish I had the right kind of luck. I feel it’s just like I’m in this stream or this river and sometimes it’s just taking you where you need to go. Sometimes you’ve got to paddle and go in certain directions and other times you’re just letting it take you. And for me, like I said, my life has turned out unbelievable. That I’ve been married and with the same man for 25 years is insane.
STEREOGUM: Yeah, that is amazing.
SMYTH: Who the heck knows what would’ve happened if I joined Van Halen?
STEREOGUM: Also, I don’t know the details surrounding the tensions you experienced within Scandal, but do you think it’s fair to say that your prior negative experience in a group dynamic might have given you pause to join another — way more publicly rambunctious — group?
SMYTH: Yeah, that definitely has something to do with it. I’m sure. And also just the fact that it was like, “I’m going to have to move to LA.” I should have just had the conversation [with Eddie]. It was such a weird conversation. But if he had said to me, “Look, just come out for a few months and make a record. Have the baby, come out and let’s make a record.” That to me would’ve been more doable.
And I never said anything about it for years. I got a call from Ed and he was like, “Look, I’m not saying that I asked you to join because I don’t want Sammy Hagar to look like [he was] second choice,” and I was like, “OK.” So I never spoke about it after that. I’m like, all right I don’t need to tell people. If someone asked me, I didn’t lie but I didn’t really talk about it that much.Dave
VH FOREVER!!!!!!!
Stats:
BECAME PSYCHO FAN: 12/91
VAN HALEN W/DAVE: 9x
VAN HALEN W/SAMMY: 8x
VAN HALEN W/GARY: 5x
MAMMOTH WVH: 2x
CHICKENFOOT/THE CIRCLE: 10x
DAVE SOLO: 14x
SAMMY SOLO: 15x (W/MONTROSE 1x, @CABO WABO CANTINA 1x)
GARY/EXTREME/TRIBE OF JUDAH/HURTSMILE: 7x
MET: Sammy 1x, Gary 2x, almost Dave & Wolf
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Thanks / Likes - 2 LikesSimon Ribeiro, TopJ Liked This Post
07.23.20, 10:56 AM
#2


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I guess there's 2 ways to read into that part I was talking about. One's "holy shit," and two is "ah, that makes sense."
Dave
VH FOREVER!!!!!!!
Stats:
BECAME PSYCHO FAN: 12/91
VAN HALEN W/DAVE: 9x
VAN HALEN W/SAMMY: 8x
VAN HALEN W/GARY: 5x
MAMMOTH WVH: 2x
CHICKENFOOT/THE CIRCLE: 10x
DAVE SOLO: 14x
SAMMY SOLO: 15x (W/MONTROSE 1x, @CABO WABO CANTINA 1x)
GARY/EXTREME/TRIBE OF JUDAH/HURTSMILE: 7x
MET: Sammy 1x, Gary 2x, almost Dave & Wolf
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Flying Ed Liked This Post
07.23.20, 11:12 AM
#3


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all the above - Favorite VH Song
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Thank God that never happened it was bad enough that Ed lost his fire and creativity when Sam joined
21 years old and dad has thrown him the keys to the car!!
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I would proudly wear that.
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