Chapter 3 of the Van Halen saga
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  1. #1
    Hang 'Em High
    Eddymon's Avatar
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    If its Eddie, its Van Halen
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    **2 days later at 5150**

    AVH: "You know what guys, my neck feels great today, lets jam some of the new songs and work on a set list."
    EVH: "Are you sure?"
    AVH: "Oh yeah, just can you hand me my neck brace."
    DLR: "I have a few ideas for the set list."
    EVH: "Lets hear it Dave"
    DLR: "Jamie's Cryin', I'm the One, Dance the Night Away, Unchained & Me Wise Magic."
    EVH: "I like those choices."
    MA: "I have some ideas to Eddie."
    EVH: "Thats nice, how about you Alex?"
    AVH: "I would like to play, Panama, Really Got Me, Light Up The Sky, Little guitars, and Jump.
    EVH: "And I want to play Everybody Wants Some, Romeos Delight, Mean Street, So This is Love, Somebody Get me a Doctor, and Little Dreamer.
    AVH: "Do you feel up to those songs Dave?"
    DLR: "You bet your cervical collar I am."
    EVH: "All righty then, that gives us 15 older songs plus the 8 or so new songs and the solos for our live show. Sorry Mike, we have enough songs to play now. Maybe on the next tour we will use your ideas."
    MA: (says to himself)"yeah right, there won't be a next tour with Dave & I."

    **Ed rips into the intro for "Little Dreamer"**

    DLR: "Hold on Ed, I have to take another dump."
    EVH: "Jesus Dave! You just shit about an hour ago!"
    DLR: (running into the bathroom) "I know, I had burritos again last night from the convenience store TACO BELL."
    EVH: "Hurry up, I have to pick Wolfie up at school in 45 minutes and take him to ballet practice."
    AVH: "Ballet practice?"
    EVH: "Yeah, Val wants him to broaden his horizon and signed him up for ballet."
    MA: "I think ballet isn't all that bad for him."
    EVH: "When I want your opinion Mike I will give it to you or you will see it in a GOLF magazine."
    MA: "Sorry [img]graemlins/cry.gif[/img] "

    **The toilet flushes for the 5th time and Dave comes back into the room**

    DLR: "I'm ready now guys, lets rock."
    EVH: "It fucking reeks in here now! Did you spray the air freshener?"
    DLR: "Whats that?"
    EVH: "That spray can that says Lysol."
    DLR: "I read that after I was with Della Reese and it said "disinfectant" on it so I sprayed the whole container on my dick."
    EVH: "what a dumb ass."

    They rehearse 6 songs then Ed leaves to get Wolfie........

    Stay tuned......
    'Old Van Halen, when I was in it-classic Van Halen-makes you wanna drink, dance and screw, right? And the new Van Halen encourages you to drink milk, drive a Nissan and have a relationship.' - David Lee Roth.

  2. #2
    Hang 'Em High
    Raldo's Avatar
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    Keep up the good work, Eddymon. The Della Resse/DLR stuff is hysterical!
    Remember the Heroes - 9/11/01

    In 2012, the phoenix has risen!!

    "High speed, low drag."

    "Look at all the people here tonight!!!" - 10/5/07, 5/20/08 Mohegan Sun

    Congratulations to Van Halen as part of the Class of 2007 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame!

    Cinco de Cabo @ Foxwoods: "A giant party with live music" - S. Hagar

    got tequila?

    http://keepitaliveforever.com

  3. #3
    Somebody Get Me A Doctor
    Dan Halen's Avatar
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    Funny stuff, Eddymon. [img]graemlins/thumb.gif[/img]
    "It's so damn hot... milk was a bad choice." --Ron Burgundy, Anchorman

  4. #4
    Little Dreamer

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  5. #5
    Top Of The World
    sinner's swing's Avatar
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    Unchained
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    i don't know guys, could it be that eddymon really IS an insider? It sounds pretty realistic. Have you been stringing us along this whole time dude? hilarious shit. you should right a book or put this all together as a short story when your done

  6. #6
    Take Your Whiskey Home

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    09.15.15 @ 08:40 AM
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    laughing at the ballet part.

 

 

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