Ralph's (Atomic Punks) Response To EVH Story

[Vince G.]

Received from vh@yahoogroups a few minutes ago:

Here's Ralph's response to a few of the e-mails he's received regarding his
meeting with EVH. The more I read about this guy, the more I like him. He's not
afraid to stand behind his actions...pretty cool. I'd love to see him get a shot
at the gig.

http://www.metal-sludge.com/EOTW12-1-02.htm

whoooooooo! We got quite a few emails on Ralph Saenz's latest diary entry where
he said he met Eddie Van Halen. This is one of the more brutal ones.

Ralph, singer for the Atomic Punks bumps into EDDIE FUCKING VAN HALEN in a
Staples store..... introduces himself as the frontman for that band and doesn't
ask about working with him????? Ralph is a great frontman (I have seen the
Atomic Punks a couple times) but what a MORON!!! I am now reminded why musicians
have a reputation for being idiots. The chance of a fucking lifetime to inquire
DIRECTLY to Eddie VanHalen and he "chickens out". Eddie even ASKED him if thats
all he does and he STILL didn't bring it up. WHAT THE FUCKIN FUCK??????? 90% of
the problem in landing a gig like that is making the connection ie: getting
through to them without having to deal with managers, attorneys etc who will
never even given you the chance to TRY. If we all remember our rock & roll
history... Sammy Hagar got the gig cause they both had the same fucking auto
mechanic.

A MESSAGE TO RALPH.... YOU NEVER GET ANYTHING IN THIS LIFE UNLESS YOU ASK!!!!

Ralph gets MY vote for the all time #1, prime time, blue ribbon choice, state of
the art, high tech, olympic class ASSHOLE for blowing the (possible) chance of a
lifetime. Ralph, you're a great frontman and a good singer.... but you really
blow in the common sense area!

Does ANYONE agree with me??? Any thoughts or feedback???

I'm out like Ralph's chances to EVER have an opportunity like that again.

So tell me how you really feel?

This next email even comes from a former "rock star." Sort of.

Hey Sludge...

Got a comment on the Ralph/EVH meeting at Staples (and I don't mean the local
entertainment venue)...

Ralph - you should have asked Edward to jam. A major missed opportunity on your
part.

We met in 1989, I asked Mr. Van Halen to jam and he said yes. We jammed, not
once, not twice, but, well, more than three times, Mister.

It was one of the highlights of my obscure musical career.

Next time a voice like that pops in your head...

LISTEN TO IT!

Out like Zsa Zsa,

Chris McLernon (the long lost Gabor sister)

ex-Fryday
ex-Carrera
ex-Ferrari
ex-Cold Sweat
Ex-Cold Gin
ex-Saigon Kick
ex-you get the picture...

PS-ready for your 20 Questions at any time...

Well we'll take you up on the 20 Questions and thanks for your 2 cents. The "out
like Zsa Zsa" line is also a nice touch. I know Ozzy Stillbourne wishes he
thought of it.

So what does Ralph have to say about all this? He just sent us this email
answering a few of the emails he got.

Hey I had to respond to 2 of the 59 e-mails I got about this last post of mine
about meeting Eddie Van Halen and not asking to be in his band. Check out this
first one:

I took the time out of my busy schedule to read your latest Sludge diary entry,
so you met EVH & didn't hit him up to jam, man that is lame...you would be doing
him a favor by giving him a much needed kick in the ass...don't kick too hard
though, from the pix I seen of him lately he might keel over anytime...he's got
NOTHING going on right now, no band, no
record deal, no singer, no wife, Alex is so messed up he probably can't even
play, if Ed was smart he would have contacted you before getting that lame Gary
Cherone, & you blew it...just for that you deserve to continue playing covers
the rest of your life...just my opinion...I guess you are really blonde...God
bless you & I hope your upcoming CD sells a million or two,
Dan Starr - Blizzard of Ozz

Dan
Here is my reply :
First off you are right I should of said "hey lets jam" but I didn't want to be
the annoying guy at Staples Office Supply store from a tribute band. I'll tell
you this much the guys can still rock and as much as everyone may be pissed
because they have not put anything new out in a while lets remember what they
did do for HEAVY METAL for god sakes. I want to see David Lee back with Van
Halen period! Ed, Alex, David and Michael, thanks for writting the best music
that we all look up to and respect.
Dan, by the way I'm not natural blonde.
THANKS FOR YOU E-MAIL ILOVE YOUR FEARLESS APPROACH TO HEAVY METAL YOU ROCK.

E-MAIL #2

Damn Ralph,

You should have JUMPED! That was the perfect "nothing to lose" moment.

As an artist we're always searching & waiting for that big break. Then one day
you stumble across one of your heroes, and then BAM! You choke...

I've been there before, man. It's a shitty feeling. Hell, I've even choked in
your presence...

Oh well, they're probably gonna hook up with Sammy again anyways.

Cheer up man you are doing well - better than most!

Armando

Armando,
Thanks for the e-mail I'm going to be ok..
Remember 1 thing Heavy Metal Rules and there is tons of hot chicks at Heavy
Metal shows!.
Lets face it that's all that really matters, right?

Metal Sludge is cool and so are you !

Metal Out

Maybe word will get back to Eddie or he'll see Ralph's diary and try to set
something up with Ralph. If Axl Rose can read our 20 Questions, then it's
possible somebody will point Eddie towards a computer and he'll see Ralph's
Diary. Then if Ralph got to jam with Eddie, we could take credit for it, and if
he joined Van Halen, that would be better because we would get 15% since we're
managing Ralph's career (Ralph doesn't know that yet but that's just a small
technicality.) Anyway, somebody tell Edward about all this and hook shit up. We
don't have all day.

[Grover]

You know who really choked? Eddie!

He knew about the Punks. He knows Ralph can sing. He should have been the one to invite Ralph to jam.

Ralph asking to jam would be like him saying "Hey, can I join you for Thanksgiving dinner?" It's Eddie's band, at Eddie's house, so he is the one who gets to ask people over, not the other way around.

What Ralph should have done is invited Eddie to sit in with either Metal Shop (less pressure) or the Punks.

And you know what? I think Eddie just might have done it.

[Eddymon]

I liked the part about "Ralph blowing when it comes to common sense."

He is a perfect fit for VH then. [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[sampson simpson]

What did Ralph say about his chance meeting? The site is fire-walled here at work.

[twonabomber]

"ex-Fryday
ex-Carrera
ex-Ferrari
ex-Cold Sweat
Ex-Cold Gin
ex-Saigon Kick
ex-you get the picture..."

and full-time asshole...

[el_jalepeno]

Originally posted by Grover:
Ralph asking to jam would be like him saying "Hey, can I join you for Thanksgiving dinner?" It's Eddie's band, at Eddie's house, so he is the one who gets to ask people over, not the other way around.

What Ralph should have done is invited Eddie to sit in with either Metal Shop (less pressure) or the Punks.

And you know what? I think Eddie just might have done it.

[img]graemlins/thumb.gif[/img] Hell yea [img]graemlins/thumb.gif[/img] !!!

[Joe5150]

Originally posted by sampson simpson:
What did Ralph say about his chance meeting? The site is fire-walled here at work.

What the fuck is up!
It's been a while since I have checked in with everyone..
Well my life has changed and things are completly different.

First off thank you Metal Sludge for letting me write for you. Thanks for not firing me.
let's get it on.......

I can say one thing for sure! Our quest to bring Metal Back has not changed. The Metal Sludge party was amazing. If you missed it there is always next year.

Atomic Punks stuff:
I ran in to Eddie Van Halen at Staples office supply store.

He was in line with me and I was freakin out.
I decided to introduce myself to him.

I said, "Ed hey man my name is Ralph and I play in the Atomic Punks you know the tribute to your band" he said, "oh yea I ve seen the video, not bad".. I was thinking that this would be a great time for me to ask if he wanted to get together and write some songs cause I know they are looking for a singer, but I chickened out.

I said goodbye and walked out of the store. He came out right after and asked me, "Is that all you do, you know play in the tribute thing?", I turned around and walk right up to Ed and I said, "I'm not cutting my hair and playing some shitty music I want to Rock for real" and Ed said, "So do I !" at that point I thought this is the perfect time for me to say 'let's jam' but I got scared.

I mean shit this is Eddie Van Halen the guy that changed my life without even know.. Do I turn into the crazy fan that I am? Fuck I feel like I missed a great chance to actually sing the band that I am a tribute to.

Oh well at least we know now that Eddie still wants to rock..

[weesfreewheelin]

Dan
Here is my reply :
First off you are right I should of said "hey lets jam" but I didn't want to be
the annoying guy at Staples Office Supply store from a tribute band. I'll tell
you this much the guys can still rock and as much as everyone may be pissed
because they have not put anything new out in a while lets remember what they
did do for HEAVY METAL for god sakes. I want to see David Lee back with Van
Halen period! Ed, Alex, David and Michael, thanks for writting the best music
that we all look up to and respect.
[/QB][/QUOTE]

HELL YEAH! [img]graemlins/thumb.gif[/img]

[Raldo]

Ralph seems like a pretty good guy although I must say that he should have said something to Eddie about getting together.

On a different note, how many of you out there would want Ralph to be singer #4? I'd be interested to see what the results are.

[GMAN5150]

I still want to know what the fuck EVH was doing at Staples??? Was he picking up some postems?pushpins?Magic markers?maybe it was envelopes? [img]graemlins/thumb.gif[/img] We sure know it wasn't anything to do with a computer.I think Val took that when she moved out for her and Wolfie seeing that Eddie didn't have any use for it.He probably didn't even know how to turn it on. [img]graemlins/scared.gif[/img]

[Vantrix]

Eddie was probably getting some CD-R's to put some of his demo's on to disk or possibly getting Wolfgang some school supplies. There are many reasons why EVH would be shopping at Staples. It's no big deal. Who the fuck really cares why he was there as long as he is alive and well, that's all that really matters.

[Brett]

Ed is a normal human being, haven't you guys ever needed to go to Staples? What only non-famous people go there for stuff? Come on guys.

[Wolfman]

What Vantrix and Brett said.

Can't believe the fact that Ed shops in public places is such an issue.

[rrussou812]

Originally posted by Wolfman:
What Vantrix and Brett said.

Can't believe the fact that Ed shops in public places is such an issue.

No shit, I mean the guy is a human like all of us....

except when it comes to guitar

[Vince G.]

My brother and a few of his friends ran into David Lee Roth one night at an AM/PM in Pasadena after leaving a party in the area. They said he came riding up on beach cruiser, in sweats, a ballcap and sunglasses.

These people, though famous, are people just like you and I. And, if they need to go to Staples, AM/PM, Burger King, or Toys R Us, then that's what they need to do.

Not every single celebrity shops in Beverly Hills.