S. Florida Drivers Lead Nation In Homicidal, Mind-Fucking Cluelessness...

[chefcraig]

Gee, what an unexpected surprise. A recent study found South Florida drivers to lead the country in rudeness. This ties in well with the "Car into Pool" story I submitted Saturday, along with this little episode I experienced this morning:

Everyone that lives here is aware that the mere act of crossing a street on foot in Fort Lauderdale is an often suicidal undertaking, even when using the crosswalks and signals.

Being momentarily nondeath-seeking, I pressed the button at an intersection, and waited for the "Walk" signal. It flashed, and as I made my way across the street, a small, silver, sportscar convertible started RIGHT AT ME! The driver, apparently unaware of the rules of the road, decided not only was I some sort of impediment to his progress, yet I should pay for the sin with my life.

I jumped aside, turned, then thrust my fist as hard as I humanly could into his passing side window, connecting with it with an almighty crack. Thankfully, this sound was caused by the concussion with the window, not my fist or wrist shattering.

This act surprised our "oh so in a hurry, my life means more than your's" driver, as my fist wound up a mere 5 inches from the side of his rather thick skull. He stopped his little rocket powered replacement for a penis, rolled down his window and started screaming some rather unintelligible remarks.

I then approached him, more than ready to inflict some damage upon his person, rather than his vehicle this time. I also started to inflict some rather insghtful remarks regarding his intelligence, ignorance of traffic signals and more than likely questionable heritage, including a nickname for one far too close to one's mom, in a carnal sense.

He promptly fled.

This was an apparently well-off individual, judging by his choice of automobile, only further proving that despicable behavior knows no class distinction.

Here's the SunSentinel article on the dreaded state of S. Florida drivers:



S. Florida ranks first in U.S. for rude drivers, survey says

By Jamie Malernee and Paola Iuspa-Abbott
South Florida Sun-Sentinel
Posted May 16 2007


Note to South Florida drivers: Red lights are not a suggestion. Tailgating is for football. And that lever beside your steering wheel? It activates something called a "blinker."

That's just a friendly reminder, courtesy of your fellow motorists, who voted Miami and surrounding areas north including Fort Lauderdale as having the rudest, most road-rage prone drivers in the country for the second year in a row, according to a national survey released Tuesday.

More than half of those surveyed reported seeing someone run a red light on a daily basis. More than half reported drivers doing multiple tasks while driving, like putting on makeup or reading. And more than a third reported seeing drivers slamming on their brakes at the last minute.

The study, sponsored by AutoVantage, a national auto membership club based in Connecticut, surveyed more than 2,500 people from the 25 largest metropolitan areas in the United States.

South Florida beat out New York, Boston and Los Angeles. According to the survey, the most courteous drivers were in Portland, Ore.; Pittsburgh, the Seattle-Tacoma area, St. Louis and Dallas-Fort Worth.

South Florida's dubious honor was little surprise to any local who has driven on Interstate 95.

"It's a free-for-all," said Deerfield Beach resident Debbie Szumski, who now avoids the highway entirely.

She has a theory for why the area is so bad: South Florida's sunshine has attracted the worst drivers from across the globe -- aging retirees, impatient youngsters, tourists and transplants from other states and countries who aren't familiar with local roads or laws.

"It's not necessarily Florida drivers. We're drivers from all over," said Szumski, 54, a Massachusetts native.

"They cut you off and it's like, `Yup, I left that spot open just for you, buddy!'" she said with sarcasm.

Gregg Laskoski, spokesman for AAA Auto Club South, which represents Florida, said the spread of rude driving has spurred his group to conduct a "Courtesy Counts" campaign. It recommends planning for accidents and traffic delays to reduce stress.

But Laskoski, a former New York cab driver, said South Floridians shouldn't take their rude reputation too personally.

"A lot of this has to do with population density and traffic congestion. Those high on the list are high on those factors," he said.

Florida's governor didn't bother to contest the survey.

"It's a reminder that we ought to -- all of us -- be a little more cautious, patient and do unto others," Gov. Charlie Crist said as he was being driven through Miami. (Yup, hoping for something always works. )

Jamie Malernee can be reached at jmalernee@sun-sentinel.com or 954-356-4849.

The Associated Press contributed to this report.
http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/loc...sfla-news-sfla

[jimmy812]

I don't doubt any of this, but there was really a study done on this?

[Menlow]

We're number one, we're number one

[Gypsy King]

Can't speak for South Florida but the worst drivers I have witnessed are in the Largo/Clearwater area of Florida. Once past a certain age, some people should definitely not be on the road.

[charlesresta]

Back to back champs! 2 years in a row. It will only get worse as many major highways are under construction,hurricane season looming and high gas prices. Really a waste of money on this study as I assumed this was common knowledge.

[mistershow]

I'm actually suprised that NJ, Mass, and Conn didn't beat FLA out. I guess I shouldn't be, but I am nonetheless.

[Axxman300]

I don't see how Los Angeles is in the top five.

The drivers in southern California are generally well behaved and are much smarter than their Northern California counterparts.

Then again, the reason for this is because nobody wants to cut off a car load of gangbabgers, but it does make for a better driving atmosphere. I realize that this will come as a shock to people who actually live in Los Angeles but I should point out that I'm talking about highway driving only, you're surface streets are still a giant bumber-car ride.

The worst place I've ever driven was the LBJ Freeway in Dallas, TX. Talk about a thrid world country. The four days I was there they had six people killed on a four mile stretch of that highway. Worst designed highway on Earth.

[chefcraig]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070515/...e_us/road_rage

The list, ranked from those reporting the most incidents of road rage to the fewest:

1. Miami/Fort Lauderdale

2. New York

3. Boston

4. Los Angeles

5. Washington, D.C.

6. Phoenix

7. Chicago

8. Sacramento, Calif.

9. Philadelphia

10. San Francisco

11. Houston

12. Atlanta

13. Detroit

14. Minneapolis-St. Paul

15. Baltimore

16. Tampa, Fla.

17. San Diego

18. Cincinnati

19. Cleveland

20. Denver

21. Dallas-Ft. Worth

22. St. Louis

23. Seattle-Tacoma

24. Pittsburgh

25. Portland, Ore.

[Wickett]

I don't see how Los Angeles is in the top five.

The drivers in southern California are generally well behaved and are much smarter than their Northern California counterparts.

Then again, the reason for this is because nobody wants to cut off a car load of gangbabgers, but it does make for a better driving atmosphere. I realize that this will come as a shock to people who actually live in Los Angeles but I should point out that I'm talking about highway driving only, you're surface streets are still a giant bumber-car ride.

The worst place I've ever driven was the LBJ Freeway in Dallas, TX. Talk about a thrid world country. The four days I was there they had six people killed on a four mile stretch of that highway. Worst designed highway on Earth.

I thought Dallas driving was nuts until I moved to South Florida. The traffic is a bitch at times in DFW, but the idiocy of the drivers doesn't even compare. The drivers in Miami/Ft Lauderdale are generally rude and obnoxious. Not to mention I've never seen more panhandlers on the side of the road as there are there.

[Axxman300]

Not to mention I've never seen more panhandlers on the side of the road as there are there.

That's because it's leathal to stand within 10 yards of the road on Dallas. In the case of panhandlers, that's probably a good thing.

I was visiting my brother, he drove me around big D and pointed out all of the craziness. This is a guy who's driven in Rome, Athens, Cairo, London, Paris and Ryad. He says to me that if we blow a tire that we won't stop because it's too dangerous, sure enough the next morning I read in the newspaper about some guy who was killed changing a tire on the LBJ.

What kills me are the "Access Roads", in California we have "On-Ramps" and "Off-Ramps". In Dallas, you drive parallel along an Access Road and at some point you just jump onto the freeway. Often at the same point where someone on the freeway can jump off. I don't have that kind of faith in my fellow drivers. It's bad enough when some chump decides to take the freeway doing 40mph, at least with an on-ramp you know it's coming and can merge left, with an access road, BOOM, said asshat it right there.

I totally agree with the Florida thing BTW.

[vhrocker]

Good thing I live in Oklahoma.