"I'm Sammy J. Van Halen West!"
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  1. #1
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    "I'm Sammy J. Van Halen West!"

    Published: April 27, 2007 08:08 pm

    PFEIFFER: Hey, I’m with the band

    Cops Notebook
    By Rick Pfeiffer/pfeifferr@gnnewspaper.com
    Niagara Gazette

    Sorry I failed to make it to Falls City Court on Friday morning for the appearance of two legendary rockers.

    Well, actually, I think it was the appearance of a conflicted man who isn’t exactly sure who he wants to be.

    I’m referring to Sammy J. Van Halen West. It seems he can’t quite decide between the persona of one time Van Halen frontman Sammy Hagar or the leader of the band, Eddie Van Halen.

    Where the “West” comes from is not clear.

    Reliable sources say he announced his arrival to face trespassing charges by entering the Court Clerk’s office and uttering, “Van Halen in the house.” Understand he also took pains to point out to the judge that Van Halen is his legal name.

    Now, as to that trespassing charge, seems the 45-year-old Van Halen West was kicked out, for good, of the McDonald’s on Niagara Falls Boulevard. He was barred because a McDonald’s manager told police, “Sammy keeps coming in and hitting on all the girls.”

    Slick.

    His final transgression was apparently telling a young girl at the fast food joint that, and I’m paraphrasing here, large chests mean large trouble.

    Nonetheless, he returned half an hour later, so now the Munson Avenue resident can explain his behavior to the judge.

    Baby I’ll be there to share the land...

    With apologies to the Guess Who, it seems Clarence J. Smoke is looking to share some land, like a piece of the 300 block of Fourth Street.

    Smoke, who according to police booking records has no home address, was arrested early Friday morning after a tussle with both Seneca Nation marshals and Falls police.

    Seems the marshals told him to stop taking pop bottles from a recycling bin outside the casino. When he refused to stop they tried to detain him and call the cops.

    Not content to wrestle with the marshals, Smoke decide to tangle with Falls Police Capt. Dave LeGault, the commander to the SWAT team and a pretty big guy. Smoke lost that match and was taken into custody.

    It was then, after being charged with disorderly conduct, resisting arrest and trespass, that Smoke proclaimed his Native American heritage and posed a pointed question, “How do I get arrested trespassing on my own land?”

    Moving up and moving out

    Wow, the changes keep coming at 520 Hyde Park Blvd.

    There are two new lieutenants on the afternoon shift, with former narcotics detective Bryan DalPorto and Roving Anti-Crime Officer Dave Kok moving into those slots. DalPorto is being replaced in narcotics by former RAC Officer Jay Reynolds, while Patrol Officers Joe Palermo and Dan Pierini are moving into RAC.

    More retirements are looming with Detective Ed Janese, and City Court Detail Officers Roland Johnston and Bill Frye now also preparing to hang up their badges.

  2. #2
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    HUH??????

  3. #3
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    This guy is goofier than a pet coon!!!
    ALEX IS GOD!!!

    I've been doin' this for 'bout 20 years now, and I'll tell ya, to this day I still don't know the right drumstick from the left drumstick -Alex Van Halen


  4. #4
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    Yes yes, the Niagara Falls police blotter will do that too you. A Buffalo morning radio show used to read it for shits and giggles...

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nickdfresh View Post
    Reliable sources say he announced his arrival to face trespassing charges by entering the Court Clerk’s office and uttering, “Van Halen in the house.”

    That's funny as hell. Whenever I show up to face charges, I usually make eye contact with a bailiff and say, "WTF are you looking at, Fife?"

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by vhrocker View Post
    This guy is goofier than a pet coon!!!


    "This guy is nuttier than squirrel turd!"

    "You're nuttier than Chinese chicken salad, mmmkay"

    LOL.....
    "It doesn't mean that much to me to mean that much to you..." -Neil Young

    "The sun's not yellow, it's chicken." -Bob Dylan

    "If you go out and buy a Van Halen record and put it in your collection, it'll melt your other records." -David Lee Roth, 1981.

    Guy of Gisborne: Why a spoon, cousin? Why not an axe?
    Sheriff of Nottingham: Because it's DULL, you twit!!! It'll HURT MORE!!!

  7. #7
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    My dad was a NFPD cop for 31 years, and founded the original k-9 Corps in the 60's/70's.

    Reading this brings back memories, I know all those streets.....

  8. #8
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    11.30.11 @ 08:12 PM
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    +1 just because I read that.
    Fair Warning... It's 5150 Time!!

 

 

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