In my next life........
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  1. #1
    The Full Bug
    vhrocker's Avatar
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    The one I'm listenin' to.
    Favorite VH Song

    Can't pick just one
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    Default In my next life........

    I want to live my next life backwards:
    You start out dead and get that out of the way.
    Then you wake up in an old age home feeling better every day.
    Then you get kicked out for being too healthy.
    Enjoy your retirement and collect your pension.
    Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day.
    You work 40 years until you're too young to work.
    You get ready for college: drink alcohol, party, you're pretty much a free spirit.
    Then you go to grade school, become a kid, play, and have no responsibilities.
    Then you become a baby, and then...
    You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in spa-like conditions - central heating, room service on tap, and then...
    You finish off as an orgasm.

    I rest my case…

    ALEX IS GOD!!!

    I've been doin' this for 'bout 20 years now, and I'll tell ya, to this day I still don't know the right drumstick from the left drumstick -Alex Van Halen


  2. #2
    Hang 'Em High
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    Robin Williams used to do a riff like this in his stand-up routine, roughly twenty years ago. You know, when he was actually still funny.

    It ends stating "and then you disappear, just a gleam in someone's eye".
    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
    George Bernard Shaw

  3. #3
    Bullethead
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    Default

    haha good one..
    In my next life... I want to be a lesbian..

    I think that is not too much to ask for is it?

  4. #4
    Runnin' With The Devil
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    Panama
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    07.15.21 @ 02:28 PM
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    I had an uncle who was in the military for 33 years. Great guy. He lived to be 83 and died in a firey car crash, fell asleep at the wheel on the way home from a family reunion. Anyhow, I was the last one to talk to him before he left for home in California and he said, Golden years my ass, your golden years are when you are younger and can get around, enjoy life when you are young don't run run run. Live each day.

    In my next life, I would like to be an eagle. How cool would it be to fly above the earth like that whenever you wanted.
    "Knowing is not enough, we must apply,willing is not enough, we must do" -Goethe

    Minds are like parachutes. They only function when they are open.--Sir James Dewar, Scientist (1877-1925)

    Always drink upstream from the herd...
    --Will Rogers

    It is amazing how much some people can do with so little, however, what is even more amazing to me is how little some people can do with so much.
    --Somewhat me, mostly someone else, not sure who

  5. #5
    Everybody Wants Some!!
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    Default

    In my next life I want to be Jessica Alba's thong.

  6. #6
    I'm The One
    Thai Boxer 9901's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LowLifeFlatHeadScum View Post
    In my next life I want to be Jessica Alba's thong.
    haha, that didnt take much thought did it
    Facebook http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=504401115
    YouTube http://www.youtube.com/user/jedimasterkyle

    BOISE STATE BRONCOS! - They're awesome. Deal with it!

    11/16/04 - VAN HALEN in Boise, Idaho. Changed my life forever

    8/8/06 - Sammy Hagar and the Wabos w/Michael Anthony in Boise, Idaho. Sam and Mike still kick ass

 

 

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