In my next life........

**vhrocker** · 04.20.07, 02:36 PM

I want to live my next life backwards:
You start out dead and get that out of the way.
Then you wake up in an old age home feeling better every day.
Then you get kicked out for being too healthy.
Enjoy your retirement and collect your pension.
Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day.
You work 40 years until you're too young to work.
You get ready for college: drink alcohol, party, you're pretty much a free spirit.
Then you go to grade school, become a kid, play, and have no responsibilities.
Then you become a baby, and then...
You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in spa-like conditions - central heating, room service on tap, and then...
You finish off as an orgasm.

I rest my case…

**chefcraig** · 04.20.07, 03:05 PM

Robin Williams used to do a riff like this in his stand-up routine, roughly twenty years ago. You know, when he was actually still funny.

It ends stating "and then you disappear, just a gleam in someone's eye".

**m4rk0** · 04.20.07, 04:00 PM

haha good one..
In my next life... I want to be a lesbian..

I think that is not too much to ask for is it?

**Executionor** · 04.22.07, 09:02 PM

I had an uncle who was in the military for 33 years. Great guy. He lived to be 83 and died in a firey car crash, fell asleep at the wheel on the way home from a family reunion. Anyhow, I was the last one to talk to him before he left for home in California and he said, Golden years my ass, your golden years are when you are younger and can get around, enjoy life when you are young don't run run run. Live each day.

In my next life, I would like to be an eagle. How cool would it be to fly above the earth like that whenever you wanted.