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09.23.06, 05:20 AM #1Light Up The Sky
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Papa Simpson has a new plan to pimp out his offspring.
Papa Joe's been on a tear this week, looking to maximize the profitability of his daughters in hopes of opening his own bronzer and hair frosting hall of fame.
For most dads, vacation pictures are a thing to take home, cherish and look back at every once in a while to reflect on all of the familial adventures. For Papa Joe, they're a business venture. You see, the preacher-turned-manager has a deal with a major photo agency, where he exclusively sells rights to pictures, often titillating ones, of his daughters. He even battles paparazzi at red carpet events and sells his own pictures. Way to go, dad!
As if that's not bad enough, his latest quest to capitalize on his daughter's money-makers, Simpson's all hopped up on the idea of opening a Daisy Dukes restaurant -- think Hooters, only campier and based on Jessica Simpson's short-shorts movie role."Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.” -- Gen. George S. Patton
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09.23.06, 06:35 AM #2Take Your Whiskey Home
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If he's gonna do a Daisy Dukes restaurant maybe he should pair it with a Milli-Vanilli Karaoke bar or something.
It's pathetic to say but everything he has done or is gonna do was gonna be done in some way shape or form by somebody. At least it's being kept in the family so dim-wit & lip-synch have a better chance of not having to do playboy until they're 50 or so.-TVH-
There seems to be some perverse human characteristic that likes to make easy things difficult. -Warren Buffett
If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace. -Thomas Paine
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09.23.06, 09:13 AM #3Master Bluesman
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Whatta mean based on "Jessica's" movie role. Catherine Bach was and is the only Daisy Duke. She created the shorts and the role. Jessica is a no-talent hack. A good-lookin one yeah. But still a hack.
Originally Posted by voivod
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09.23.06, 11:59 AM #4Somebody Get Me A Doctor
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05.31.14 @ 08:17 PM - Likes (Given)
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Why not do a promotion with the "Pink Taco" chain instead.
I dunno about this guy, I have friends with daughters, none of them would start a business based on how great their asses look in tight shorts.
The fact that Joe is/was a Christian Minister just makes this more than a little wierd. I mean the preacher's daughters were always crazy but the Preacher wasn't joining in on the fun.
"Nothing is ever what it seems but everything is exactly what it is." - B. Banzai
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09.23.06, 05:52 PM #5Somebody Get Me A Doctor
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Originally Posted by Elwood P.
I don't know... April Scott is making me forget about Catherine Bach pretty quick...
Okay, here's your Catherine Bach...
I'll take April anyday...Jet City Super Stealth
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09.23.06, 08:37 PM #6Light Up The Sky
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HEY... That's not fair, she was hot back in the day and this picture was taken after she just had a baby, for lunch... Originally Posted by fast98dodge
Okay, here's your Catherine Bach...
I'll take April anyday...
"Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.” -- Gen. George S. Patton
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09.23.06, 10:08 PM #7Everybody Wants Some!!
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Originally Posted by voivod
HEY... That's not fair, she was hot back in the day and this picture was taken after she just had a baby, for lunch...
Good lord......looks like she consumed and assimilated Kathleen Turner!
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09.24.06, 05:32 AM #8Master Bluesman
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Fine, I'll take Catherine B. (circa 1978) over April Scott, she looks like she could use a cheeseburger or 2. Originally Posted by fast98dodge
"I'm the opposite of Bill Cosby. Diamond Dave always gets your approval." (DLR)
"Rawhide in "A"
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09.24.06, 05:44 AM #9Master Bluesman
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Man, she has put on a couple of pounds though.
Last edited by Elwood P.; 09.24.06 at 05:46 AM.
"I'm the opposite of Bill Cosby. Diamond Dave always gets your approval." (DLR)
"Rawhide in "A"
Tom Brady hates tomatoes
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09.24.06, 09:54 AM #10Somebody Get Me A Doctor
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I hope she stays away from the cheeseburgers because you see what happened to Catherine Bach... Originally Posted by Elwood P.
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09.25.06, 01:31 PM #11Hang 'Em High
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You could say the same for his daughters... Originally Posted by Ted Van Halen
And what's up with April Scott's body...is she deformed? Her waist reminds me of a "Stretch Armstrong" doll.
"The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."George Bernard Shaw
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09.25.06, 02:24 PM #12Hang 'Em High
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I dunno about that Simpson guy. He needs to make dough on his own and quit living off of his daughters. I like those names that someone gave them earlier in the thread. Definitely appropriate.
And the original Daisy will do just fine. There's only one Daisy Duke.
RIP - Classic Van Halen
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09.25.06, 02:39 PM #13Big Bad Bill
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I'm to the point where who cares what that guy does. His daughters are dumb enough to go along (although they are loaded and I'm broke - so who's dumb?).
I just hope he convinces them to do Playboy before it's too late.
Well, I could see Jessica in Playboy.
Ashlee, she might do something a bit raunchier.
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