Dave vs. Eddie

[Van Heineken]

Ok, it's bizarro world and you're forced to choose between living out the rest of your days as Dave or Ed. Which would it be?

• Both shadows of their former greatness.
• Both performing Hillbilly Halen music that has classic VH fans considering the upside of premature hearing loss.
• Both struggling with addictions: Ed's love of the cig/grape/pipe/metal pick/take your pick; Dave's love for himself and Melrose Avenue takeout.
• Both with image problems: Dave's Jack LaLanne meets Wink Martindale vibe. Ed's Keith Richards meets Howard Hughes combo.
• Both looking to distance themselves from monumental failures: VH III and Dave FM - "If it sounds good, it ain't these."
• Both former heavyweight champeens. In this corner, metal's greatest frontman and stripper boffer. In this corner, hard rock's greatest guitarist and whammy bartender.
• Both needing the other far more than they care to admit.

For me, the choice is an easy one. As much as I would give my left butt cheek to be able to play guitar for one day like Ed, I'm not going to sacrifice my cognitive abilities to do it and in recent years, Ed appears to be about as lucid as Anna Nicole Smith on a diet pills and bourbon bender. Dave's career is a veritable "how to guide to hasbeen land," but the guy can actually still carry on a conversation and has done more in the last few years than most people squeeze into a lifetime (author, paramedic, DJ, Van Halen karaoke tours, etc.).

Sad that's it come to this, but in bizarro world, it's Dave to the grave for moi. What do y'all think?

On a completely unrelated note, I'm listening to the Scorpion's Blackout as I write this and must say that Matthias Jabs was a damn fine Eddie clone in his day right down to the stripes. LOL

[Lance]

Didn't they do that as an episode of "Celebrity Death Match", once? If not, they should.

[Van Heineken]

221 views and no one would rather step into Eddie's shoes than Dave's. Either this thread is just too bizarro for it's own good or the flower shop gig has people seriously reconsidering the appeal of being Kind Edward. LOL

I just find it interesting that 15 or 20 some years ago, most people on this board would've happily traded places with their chosen VH hero in the prime of their lives to live out their rock and roll fantasy. Now that prospect is not nearly as appealing, primarily because Dave and Ed have refused to grow old gracefully. Being young and reckless was a big part of VH's appeal, so it's not surprising that these guys clung to that image for so long, but I honestly believe if either of them have any hopes of regaining credibility and repairing the legacy of a once great band, it's time to embrace new roles befitting their age.

The Rolling Stones are the model to follow. They're old men in a young man's game, but they've acknowledged the limitations of their age. They downplay the sex and drugs stuff that you really don't want to hear from guys who are grampas and it's all about the rock and roll now. If VH could put out an album anywhere near A Bigger Bang at this point in time, the world would beat a path to their door.

[Fair Warning Rocks!]

This thread is "too bizarro"! Your comparisions are sad but pretty much true. You left out DLR's cocaine habit. But using the Rolling Stones as an example? Maybe Mic, but Ron Woods is still in and out of rehab, and Keith Richards is falling out of coconut trees on his head (i swear this guy made a deal with Satan).

[mikewails]

So who is better? Dave or Sam?

[Lance]

So who is better? Dave or Sam?

Oh no, here we go, again.

[Greenpaw]

I'd pick Ed because at least I could go to rehab and a therapist, call Sam and get the band back together.

Dave's been long gone since the early 80's

[Van Squalen]

I like cucumber and gorgonzola cheese sammiches.

[Jimmy is Cool]

I like cucumber and gorgonzola cheese sammiches.

That had me rolling on the floor laughing

[Bob_R]

Ed as a musician.
Dave as a human being.

[z28girl]

So I can look at myself naked in the mirror while playing guitar.

[mcbain]

I'd pick Ed because at least I could go to rehab and a therapist, call Sam and get the band back together.

Dave's been long gone since the early 80's

I agree with this. At this point Ed could release a VH album with Sammy, start a new band and retire the VH name, or release an album with a bunch of current singers ala Santana. I think any of these things would be relevant in todays music scene. The only thing Dave could do that would possibly be considered relevant is get back with Ed.

[EddiePie68]

There both talented on different levels.
But I would have to say Ed because what he does on a guitar is a huge talent. Dave could never touch that lol

[smithjc]

I'd go with the Edward choice along with a big mirror like someone else posted earlier.

I like to think I'd make better choices for utilizing all that talent tho.

btw - Disagree w/the Matthias Jabs comment. No effin way.

[sixstring]

WTF...