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  1. #16
    Atomic Punk Get The Show On The Road's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by It's Mike View Post
    Italians are the same way. My parents home is always home to me. It's just the way we were raised. There was never a rush to leave. If your kids moved out young then something went very wrong.
    Yep. In my house something went very wrong and I couldn't wait to get the hell out of there.
    The only genre I really know is Van Halen.

  2. #17
    Emperor of VHLinks.com Brett's Avatar
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    Default The Mind Boggles

    I lived at home until I was 25. Of course I lived away from home for four years in college. But it took me a couple years of working to have enough to move out. My parents would never think of charging me anything. Hell I could move back home today if I had to.
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  4. #18
    Forum Frontman It's Mike's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Get The Show On The Road View Post
    Yep. In my house something went very wrong and I couldn't wait to get the hell out of there.
    parents split, right? Also unusual among Italians back in the day. Sadly, not so much anymore.

  5. #19
    Atomic Punk Get The Show On The Road's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by It's Mike View Post
    parents split, right? Also unusual among Italians back in the day. Sadly, not so much anymore.
    Yep. Mom bailed when I was 12. My dad remarried and she turned out to be an abusive you know what. Once I turned 18 and graduated high school I made plans to get out and my dad helped me by co-signing for my first apartment.

    He divorced her a few years later.

    My number one goal in my life now is to make sure that doesn't happen to my boys.
    The only genre I really know is Van Halen.

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  7. #20
    Good Enough
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    Quote Originally Posted by It's Mike View Post
    I'd have no issues with our kids doing the same, actually I'd prefer it.
    You don't trust your adult kids - even 35 year-olds - enough to lead their own lives without your watchful gaze and playing chaperone? If so then that's fucked up.

  8. #21
    Forum Frontman It's Mike's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlofeldsCat View Post
    You don't trust your adult kids - even 35 year-olds - enough to lead their own lives without your watchful gaze and playing chaperone? If so then that's fucked up.
    I don't remember saying that.

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  9. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by It's Mike View Post
    Italians are the same way. My parents home is always home to me. It's just the way we were raised. There was never a rush to leave. If your kids moved out young then something went very wrong.
    Yep. I figured you would understand. I lived at home for a long time. I was the baby and wasn't married or kids. Mom was basically single/alone as dad was in a nursing home. She and I weren't in a hurry to go our separate ways. We relied on each other.

  10. #23
    Atomic Punk RRvh1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brett View Post
    I lived at home until I was 25. Of course I lived away from home for four years in college. But it took me a couple years of working to have enough to move out. My parents would never think of charging me anything. Hell I could move back home today if I had to.
    My mom and dad have been apart for a very long time.... Much water under the bridge that I just don't feel like typing out or trying to explain. Both good people, both devoted parents to their only child - yours truly - yet not without faults... I've been in a rut for a while with "M" for various reasons. Nothing critical, yet a few bumps in the road on a few levels. My mom (Bless her heart!) said "You know there's always a room here for you..." Haha. Not that I'm in need of one, and tbb, she has drastically downsized since the divorce, yet you gotta love the mommy instincts!



    Quote Originally Posted by Get The Show On The Road View Post
    Yep. Mom bailed when I was 12. My dad remarried and she turned out to be an abusive you know what. Once I turned 18 and graduated high school I made plans to get out and my dad helped me by co-signing for my first apartment.

    He divorced her a few years later.

    My number one goal in my life now is to make sure that doesn't happen to my boys.
    I only 'liked' the post for the fact that you obviously want a different path for your kids. That's awesome, and I hope it continues to play out the way you want it.
    "There's too many people on this basketball that's floating around the sun, who are too afraid to allow themselves to FEEL" - Edward Van Halen
    "Van Halen was never about the singer..." - A very wise fan.
    "Embrace the past. Live in the moment but keep your eyes on the future, and keep on moving forward..." - Richie Sambora

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  12. #24
    Gird your loins Daisy Hill's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by It's Mike View Post
    I don't believe in kids paying rent to live at home. Just not something I'd ever ask my kids to do nor did my parents ever ask me to do. But I think this only works if the kids are responsible. I lived at home til I get married as did my wife. I'd have no issues with our kids doing the same, actually I'd prefer it. But our kids will have jobs (just like I always did) once they are done school or they'll live somewhere else. I don't want their money but they will be working and saving so that when they leave they'll never have to return. Living at home doesn't mean being allowed to be irresponsible. It merely gives you an opportunity to be in a better financial spot long term.
    It's one thing if your kids are being responsible with their money, paying down student loan debts or saving up. But to have a kid living at home with no strings attached is doing them a dis service in my opinion.

    I told my boy he could live at home free as long as he was going to school, bettering himself, etc, But once he dropped out and got himself a dead end job, he had to pay up. At that point he had taken the position that he was a grown man, "finished" with being raised and capable of making his own decisions

    He was given a time line to line up some roomies and find an apartment, because to continue to support him and be the safety net that allowed him to make poor decisions was not in his best interest.

    yes I would have liked him to hang around, I enjoyed his company. but that would have been selfish.

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  14. #25
    Forum Frontman It's Mike's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Daisy Hill View Post
    It's one thing if your kids are being responsible with their money, paying down student loan debts or saving up. But to have a kid living at home with no strings attached is doing them a dis service in my opinion.

    I told my boy he could live at home free as long as he was going to school, bettering himself, etc, But once he dropped out and got himself a dead end job, he had to pay up. At that point he had taken the position that he was a grown man, "finished" with being raised and capable of making his own decisions

    He was given a time line to line up some roomies and find an apartment, because to continue to support him and be the safety net that allowed him to make poor decisions was not in his best interest.

    yes I would have liked him to hang around, I enjoyed his company. but that would have been selfish.
    No strings attached is not the way I'd describe my family. Lol. I worked from when i was 12 and gave the cheque to my mom for years. Allowed me to buy a 2000 dollar computer at age 15, allowed me to pay for university. Have never had 1 penny of debt except for my mortgage. This only works with responsible kids but i find that hard working responsible parents tend to get responsible kids more times than not.



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  15. #26
    Forum Frontman It's Mike's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CaboChris View Post
    Yep. I figured you would understand. I lived at home for a long time. I was the baby and wasn't married or kids. Mom was basically single/alone as dad was in a nursing home. She and I weren't in a hurry to go our separate ways. We relied on each other.
    And i think that's great. My brother in law is in the same spot. He's not married. Could have left home years ago but leaving his mom alone to live on his own almost seems like deserting her (husband died a long time ago).

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  16. #27
    Atomic Punk Dave's Dreidel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Daisy Hill View Post
    It's one thing if your kids are being responsible with their money, paying down student loan debts or saving up. But to have a kid living at home with no strings attached is doing them a dis service in my opinion.

    I told my boy he could live at home free as long as he was going to school, bettering himself, etc, But once he dropped out and got himself a dead end job, he had to pay up. At that point he had taken the position that he was a grown man, "finished" with being raised and capable of making his own decisions

    He was given a time line to line up some roomies and find an apartment, because to continue to support him and be the safety net that allowed him to make poor decisions was not in his best interest.

    yes I would have liked him to hang around, I enjoyed his company. but that would have been selfish.
    This.

    I can remember when my older brother quit college. My dad.."ok, you are a grown man, you can do what you want. And a grown man doesn't live with his parents. Consider this your two week notice to get out of my house."

    I love my sons, but you have to kick them out. Not saying I won't help them until the day I die, but they have to get out on their own and make the effort.
    If I don't respond to you it means I have you on ignore, which means you are a douchenozzle.

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  18. #28
    Atomic Punk Get The Show On The Road's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RRvh1 View Post
    My mom and dad have been apart for a very long time.... Much water under the bridge that I just don't feel like typing out or trying to explain. Both good people, both devoted parents to their only child - yours truly - yet not without faults... I've been in a rut for a while with "M" for various reasons. Nothing critical, yet a few bumps in the road on a few levels. My mom (Bless her heart!) said "You know there's always a room here for you..." Haha. Not that I'm in need of one, and tbb, she has drastically downsized since the divorce, yet you gotta love the mommy instincts!





    I only 'liked' the post for the fact that you obviously want a different path for your kids. That's awesome, and I hope it continues to play out the way you want it.
    All good Robbie, I figured as much.
    The only genre I really know is Van Halen.

  19. #29
    Atomic Punk bklynboy68's Avatar
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    †"He has a swaggering retro machismo that will give hives to the Steinem cabal" -Camille Paglia on Donald Trump

    "But, fucking with Brook is like fucking with hot shit on and ax handle. You just don't get a grip"-track5

    "Make way for the bad guy"- Tony Montana

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    "I wish Bon Jovi would've given me a call before he recorded all of his hits, because the lyrics would've been smarter, the melodies would've been much more smashing, and they would've sold a lot fewer records." -David Lee Roth

    "My beef is people thinking Bon Jovi is good cuz they sold lots of records to housewives." -tango

    "But being number one doesnít really mean jack fuck all. We sold twice as many records as other records that year (1984) that landed in the Number One position." ~Eddie Van Halen

  20. #30
    Forum Frontman It's Mike's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bklynboy68 View Post
    Well that was awkward.

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