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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by RRvh1 View Post
    That was actually pretty cool! Reminded me a bit of Two Story Town by Bon Jovi, in terms of the chord changes during the verses and the slide playing rocked as well! You know my fondness for Sambora, so that's obviously not me taking a cheap shot...

    Still love the 'radio' voice and thought you pulled off the vocals well. The lyrics were cool and like you, I love the title! Very neat to hear.

    Kudos.
    Thanks, Robbie!

    When I started coming up with this, I was hearing Toby Keith's voice in my head and it seemed like it was coming together too fast, so I thought, "Is this a song I've already heard?" I'd never intentionally listened to Toby Keith, but I found he had a song called "I Wanna Talk About Me" that was similar. Then Green Day's "When I Come Around" started going through my head. The chord progression is I V vi IV, which I discovered is also the same as U2's "With or Without You" and The Police's "So Lonely!" Turns out a LOT of songs use this chord progression. That's what's interesting when you go to the acoustic, you find out a lot of songs are the "same" song, it's all in what you put on top of it.

    But maybe now I should go back to the electric and come up with some hard rock songs...

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  3. #32
    Atomic Punk RRvh1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArtyBoy View Post
    Thanks, Robbie!

    When I started coming up with this, I was hearing Toby Keith's voice in my head and it seemed like it was coming together too fast, so I thought, "Is this a song I've already heard?" I'd never intentionally listened to Toby Keith, but I found he had a song called "I Wanna Talk About Me" that was similar. Then Green Day's "When I Come Around" started going through my head. The chord progression is I V vi IV, which I discovered is also the same as U2's "With or Without You" and The Police's "So Lonely!" Turns out a LOT of songs use this chord progression. That's what's interesting when you go to the acoustic, you find out a lot of songs are the "same" song, it's all in what you put on top of it.

    But maybe now I should go back to the electric and come up with some hard rock songs...
    Music, as well as math, are universal. That's a broad topic. Not sure I want to get into it right now. Not meaning you! Just some like to argue for the sake of it, online.

    If you can't play your tune on an acoustic around the campfire? You are lacking in the songwriting department IMO. That's just me, and I have written tunes that I wouldn't perform on an acoustic! Haha. Playing a riff based tune is often very different to 'songwriting', which many online folk tend to ignore or gloss over.

    I'm never EVER going to be a guitar hero, yet would get goosebumps if my songs inspired someone.. Sorry to ramble...

    And more to your post ^^^^, I saw an acoustic Robert Tepper show or two where he did 'No Easy Way Out' from Rockt IV. Stripped down and bare bones, the song had none of the 80's sheen and production, yet I still dug it.

    Not every tune or version thereof has to be 'groundbreaking'. That's juvenile....
    "There's too many people on this basketball that's floating around the sun, who are too afraid to allow themselves to FEEL" - Edward Van Halen
    "Van Halen was never about the singer..." - A very wise fan.
    "Embrace the past. Live in the moment but keep your eyes on the future, and keep on moving forward..." - Richie Sambora

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  5. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by RRvh1 View Post
    If you can't play your tune on an acoustic around the campfire? You are lacking in the songwriting department IMO.
    I thought about making a Rick Beato-style video where I would talk about my observations on this, but I'll try to do it here.

    When you think about "Heartbreaker," "Black Dog," "Custard Pie," or "Immigrant Song," they don't have singalong choruses. They don't have ANY chorus! At most Robert Plant finishes the verse and then says, "Go away, heartbreaakerrrrr," then Jimmy Page plays the signature riff of the song again. I think that's because the riffs are too melodically strong in themselves to then put another melody on top of it without it clashing. The riff IS the chorus. Like Eddie said, "If Dave can squeeze in a word here and there, that works for me."

    Then you think about "You Shook Me All Night Long," "For Those About to Rock," etc. Those are huge choruses the whole crowd can get into. And the underlying guitar parts are strummed chords, not riffs! When you look at early `80's bands like Ratt and Dokken, you got more into that power chord chugging sound, the "Bark at the Moon" pedal tone thing, which is more low key and easier for a singer to fit a melody over.

    Eventually it evolved to something like "18 and Life" where they strummed their electrics like acoustics (not a sound I care for), and Sebastian Bach's voice is in the spotlight, not the guitars. I think Warrant, Steelheart and a lot of those bands were going that direction.

    So I found I can come up with a riff on an electric, but if I want to think of a melody and lyrics and not burden the singer, I have to convert it to a strummed version on an acoustic and the melody and maybe words will hit me. On electric the riff itself gets you too hypnotized and takes up too much space to think of anything else.

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  7. #34
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    I posted this song on a songwriter's forum, explaining that my vocal was only for scratch purposes, but they didn't seem to think it was so bad. Plus, I can't get anyone with a real country singing voice to do it without forking out $100, so I just re-sang it a little more seriously and added the harmonies that I was saving until I got a real singer.

    In other words, here's a song you've already heard, but hopefully with better vocals plus harmonies this time.


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  9. #35
    Atomic Punk bklynboy68's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArtyBoy View Post
    I posted this song on a songwriter's forum, explaining that my vocal was only for scratch purposes, but they didn't seem to think it was so bad. Plus, I can't get anyone with a real country singing voice to do it without forking out $100, so I just re-sang it a little more seriously and added the harmonies that I was saving until I got a real singer.

    In other words, here's a song you've already heard, but hopefully with better vocals plus harmonies this time.

    Sounds like you were going for a Brad Roberts vibe.
     "He has a swaggering retro machismo that will give hives to the Steinem cabal" -Camille Paglia on Donald Trump

    "But, fucking with Brook is like fucking with hot shit on and ax handle. You just don't get a grip"-track5

    "Make way for the bad guy"- Tony Montana

    'This hamburger don't need no helper"- David Lee Roth

    "I wish Bon Jovi would've given me a call before he recorded all of his hits, because the lyrics would've been smarter, the melodies would've been much more smashing, and they would've sold a lot fewer records." -David Lee Roth

    "My beef is people thinking Bon Jovi is good cuz they sold lots of records to housewives." -tango

    "But being number one doesn’t really mean jack fuck all. We sold twice as many records as other records that year (1984) that landed in the Number One position." ~Eddie Van Halen

  10. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by bklynboy68 View Post
    Sounds like you were going for a Brad Roberts vibe.
    Looking up who Brad Roberts is, and hoping it's not a bad thing...

    OH! Somebody on the songwriting forum said I sounded like that guy. Well there you have it. He made money, didn't he? He's got a career. FAME, HERE I COME!

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  12. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArtyBoy View Post
    Looking up who Brad Roberts is, and hoping it's not a bad thing...

    OH! Somebody on the songwriting forum said I sounded like that guy. Well there you have it. He made money, didn't he? He's got a career. FAME, HERE I COME!
    LOL

    This guy

     "He has a swaggering retro machismo that will give hives to the Steinem cabal" -Camille Paglia on Donald Trump

    "But, fucking with Brook is like fucking with hot shit on and ax handle. You just don't get a grip"-track5

    "Make way for the bad guy"- Tony Montana

    'This hamburger don't need no helper"- David Lee Roth

    "I wish Bon Jovi would've given me a call before he recorded all of his hits, because the lyrics would've been smarter, the melodies would've been much more smashing, and they would've sold a lot fewer records." -David Lee Roth

    "My beef is people thinking Bon Jovi is good cuz they sold lots of records to housewives." -tango

    "But being number one doesn’t really mean jack fuck all. We sold twice as many records as other records that year (1984) that landed in the Number One position." ~Eddie Van Halen

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  14. #38
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    I wouldn't consider myself a singer at all. I really wanted somebody with a Toby Keith/Trace Adkins kind of voice to do this, but I don't know anybody like that, and people who are good on the internet usually charge $150 to sing just three minutes. If I had a meeting with the manager of a big star I would do it, but not just to post to forums for a goof!

    However...what the heck, I was mostly in tune. I've always felt like if you didn't sound like Steven Tyler or Roger Daltrey, you sucked. But I guess there can be different styles.

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  16. #39
    Atomic Punk bklynboy68's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArtyBoy View Post
    I wouldn't consider myself a singer at all. I really wanted somebody with a Toby Keith/Trace Adkins kind of voice to do this, but I don't know anybody like that, and people who are good on the internet usually charge $150 to sing just three minutes. If I had a meeting with the manager of a big star I would do it, but not just to post to forums for a goof!

    However...what the heck, I was mostly in tune. I've always felt like if you didn't sound like Steven Tyler or Roger Daltrey, you sucked. But I guess there can be different styles.
    Funny you said that because those were two singers that immediately popped into my head when I heard it.
     "He has a swaggering retro machismo that will give hives to the Steinem cabal" -Camille Paglia on Donald Trump

    "But, fucking with Brook is like fucking with hot shit on and ax handle. You just don't get a grip"-track5

    "Make way for the bad guy"- Tony Montana

    'This hamburger don't need no helper"- David Lee Roth

    "I wish Bon Jovi would've given me a call before he recorded all of his hits, because the lyrics would've been smarter, the melodies would've been much more smashing, and they would've sold a lot fewer records." -David Lee Roth

    "My beef is people thinking Bon Jovi is good cuz they sold lots of records to housewives." -tango

    "But being number one doesn’t really mean jack fuck all. We sold twice as many records as other records that year (1984) that landed in the Number One position." ~Eddie Van Halen

  17. #40
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    That's a really cool tune, Art! I likes it.

    Yeah, I concur with bboy's CTD comparison. And that's not a bad thing at all. Heck, I spun their CD back in 91 or whenever that Mmmmmmm song was about.

    Cool mix too. Doesn't sound fancy, and I like that. What do you use?

    I've got a little 6 track recorder on the way that I just ordered yesterday, hoping to dummy down my song production process for this digital age production dummy.

    Anyway. Cool song.
    ☩ ☩ ☩

  18. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArtyBoy View Post
    I posted this song on a songwriter's forum, explaining that my vocal was only for scratch purposes, but they didn't seem to think it was so bad. Plus, I can't get anyone with a real country singing voice to do it without forking out $100, so I just re-sang it a little more seriously and added the harmonies that I was saving until I got a real singer.

    In other words, here's a song you've already heard, but hopefully with better vocals plus harmonies this time.

    I'm not well versed in modern country, but that sounds like a hit song to me. That slide solo sounded awesome!

    And who knows what "good singing" is? Tom Petty had a massive career. And you ever listen to Johnny Cash real close? He was out of key all the time!

  19. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wruff_ajax View Post
    Cool mix too. Doesn't sound fancy, and I like that. What do you use?
    I use Cakewalk Home Studio 2, 2005. I got that for Christmas in 2004, I think, and have used the crap out of it ever since. Other than that, I use my Line 6 Pod 2.0 and a bunch of freeware plugins. I tried the latest, full version of Cakewalk Sonar that's now free, but found it hard to look at and difficult as hell to do things I can do as easy as breathing in the ancient version. I did use it's time stretching feature when someone suggested slowing this a few BPM might make it easier to cram in some of the lyrics.

    Quote Originally Posted by Harpospoke View Post
    I'm not well versed in modern country, but that sounds like a hit song to me. That slide solo sounded awesome!

    And who knows what "good singing" is? Tom Petty had a massive career. And you ever listen to Johnny Cash real close? He was out of key all the time!
    ^^ THIS man has a musical ear! I was surprised people on the songwriting forum seemed to really get into it, too. After Vince Neil said everyone who was in L.A. in the `80's is now in Nashville I started looking into it, and I've got to book myself a hotel up there for a couple of days and have a look around. I'd love to write songs for bands. I hear lots of people who can play and sing great, and their stuff is well-produced, but their songs have no hooks at all. Maybe I could help.

    I must confess that slide solo was piecemeal. I've never really played slide, but I worked that out on my SG Standard that has super low action. After about 10 minutes I knew the positions I needed for the melody, but playing it clean was another thing, so there's some editing magic there! If the need ever arises to play that for an arena, I'll practice up or hire Derek Trucks for a cameo.

    My Dad used to hold up Ernest Tubb as an example of a great singing voice. Now I read it was a running joke in Nashville that Ernest Tubb was almost never in tune!

    Thanks, everyone!
    Last edited by ArtyBoy; 07.29.18 at 10:01 AM.

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  21. #43
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    I like that, Art. Pretty good.

    Not sure about your singer choices, though. I see what ya mean. A low voice like those guys singing it. It would be good I'm sure, but with that guitar I think a higher voice might work better.

  22. #44
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    More of my crappy singing coming your way!

    This song isn't exactly an original, but it sort of is. First the song, then the story behind it.

    My version:



    The original:



    THE STORY:

    I was walking around our town square, and I heard this voice coming out of a taco place that was just huge. I went around the corner, and this guy was playing "Turn the Page" on acoustic guitar and singing while people ate. I've been keeping an ear out for good singers to do my songs, so I took one of the cards he had by his tip jar.

    When I got home I went to his site, and I heard this song. I liked the metaphor, that grandpa and the fiddle were one and the same, but I felt like I wanted to do a Desmond Child on it.

    So I did my rearrangement and sent it to the guy. One of my friends said I was going to look like a lunatic, but actually he was quite flattered. He's got someone from the Zac Brown Band helping him, as it turns out, and he's also got a video of him jamming with Tommy Emmanuel, so it sounds like he's making the right kind of friends! So I don't feel like this turned into a big waste of time.

    I have a hard rock song with the music finished that would be up this board's alley, but I have to write some lyrics for it. Plus I can squeak by singing country songs, but I couldn't do a hard rock song justice at all. But I'll unveil something board-appropriate in the future.

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  24. #45
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    Here's a new one called "I See It Differently." This one will further reflect the country jag I've been on this year. I was going for a Georgia Satellites/Drive-by Truckers country-rock kind of vibe.

    The third verse is a milestone for me trying to write lyrics. With this one I've really realized you don't have to write a song as yourself, you can invent characters and situations just like a movie. Based on the little bit of feedback I've gotten, what people think of the lead character/narrator affects how they like the song. Because of this I've got songs in the oven that I think will take on more of a Jason Isbell/Bruce Springsteen sort of lyrical direction.

    This one has a total of five guitars on it, so it was also a real lesson in mixing, trying to keep all the guitars from stepping on each other.


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