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  1. #1
    Eruption Women And Roth First's Avatar
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    08.30.13 @ 12:55 PM
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    I'm not Roger Ebert or anything, but I would like to announce some upcoming Films that would make massive amounts of money at the box office!

    I can almost smell "Oscars" in the air!

    National Lampoon's World Tour:
    Move over Chevy Chase, because Eddie is in the driver's seat now! He's on the most highly anticipated tour of the century, the Van Halen "Tabula Rasa" Tour, and not only that... he's bringin' the Whole family!
    Journey into the beyond in this hillirious new comedy, and all the misadventures. Including Wolfgang catching his first VD, lots of fun for the whole family!

    Rated (PG-13)

    Hey Post some good ones yourselves



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  2. #2
    Eruption Women And Roth First's Avatar
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    08.30.13 @ 12:55 PM
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    Ishtar 2: Voyage To Cabo
    Sammy Hagar and Gary Cherone showcase this follow-up to the 1987 comedy classic, The adventure begins outside of Los Angeles when two fired lead singers join forces to become the infamous Lounge Act of the 21st century.
    From the makers of Sammys' first box office smash, "The Haircage" comes a journey into the inspirational musical backgrounds of two underachievers!

    Look out Elvis, Sammy is going to Cabo, Lock your doors... and cover your tequilla!




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  3. #3
    Eruption Women And Roth First's Avatar
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    08.30.13 @ 12:55 PM
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    More to come from the mentally challenged mind of the WARF!

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    DLR Army Webmaster

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  4. #4
    Hang 'Em High Stuff No More's Avatar
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    5150
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    Dreams
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    01.08.05 @ 11:08 AM
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    Not sure that these are really opinions or speculations. I'll move it out to the "Every fan for themselves" section in the main and see if it floats there.

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    RIGHT NOW I'm livin' on the corner of Mean St. and Old Amsterdam Blvd.
    --------
    "Take your vitamin "T" with salt 'n lemon slice ..."
    UP FRONT FANATIC!

  5. #5
    carpe damn diem billy007's Avatar
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    12.12.17 @ 06:57 PM
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    Well, until I feel like thinkin' up something else, I'll just borrow one that I did on the similar thread at the DLRARMY:

    From the people who brought you "Goldsinger" and "Diamond Dave is Forever" comes the latest blockbuster motion picture: "The Man With The Golden Hair". A multiplatinum rock band has been placed in peril by an evil manipulative manager. As their career hurtles toward disaster, only one man can save them:
    She: What's your name
    He: Roth. David Lee Roth. Now lose the dress, keep the shoes.
    David Lee Roth is back in an all new adventure. It's going to be wild, wild, wild, wild... Little Elvis is combat ready and he's got a license to thrill. "The Man With The Golden Hair" - coming soon to a theatre near you. Soundtrack available early 2001 from Warner Brothers records.


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    "Ain't much distance 'tween a pat on the back
    And a kick in the pants..."

    "M-TV Get off the air...now!" - Jello Biafra

    Eat Us And Smile, y'all

    For more great Van Halen discussion, visit www.DLRArmy.com

  6. #6
    carpe damn diem billy007's Avatar
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    12.12.17 @ 06:57 PM
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    Ok, put my little peabrain to work for a few minutes:

    Somewhere, near Coldwater Canyon in Los Angeles, the mystery unfolds...
    From the people who brought you "We're Clueless" and "Just Say Anything" comes a new mystery thriller: "We Still Don't Know What You Did This Summer".
    "Had me in suspense the whole time" - Rex Reed
    "You'll be begging for more" - USA Today
    "More twists than a bag of pretzels" - Entertainment Tonight
    "Elvis seen entering 5150" - Weekly World News
    "We Still Don't Know What You Did This Summer" - playing now at a theatre near you. Rated PG for "Please, Guys..."


  7. #7
    Sinner's Swing! Darkstar's Avatar
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    Too Many!
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    12.04.14 @ 11:23 PM
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    Move over Julie Roberts........Warner Brothers presents: "Pretty Woman" starring Gary Cherone...........

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    Where the possessed go to mingle........
    Don't sweat the petty things in life, just pet the sweaty things........

  8. #8
    Eruption Women And Roth First's Avatar
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    08.30.13 @ 12:55 PM
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    The Straining (The Shining)
    Sammy Hagar stars in the bizarre masterpiece of horror. During the winter of 1985, Sammy takes his new band, "Van Halen" isolated high in the mountains to become the possessed caretaker of a haunted hotel to recored the anticipated "5150" album.

    Eddie: I think michael needs to go to a hospital.

    Sammy: (In an eerie voice) You think Michael needs to go to a hospital? You waited your whole freakin' career for a new lead singer... what's a new lead singer gonna do you now?!?!

    Eddie: Stop It!

    Sammy: Put down the gibson.

    Eddie: (Crying) Stop It! (Swings the guitar at Sammy)

    Sammy: Eddie, Honey, Light of my life! Put down the gibson... I'm not gonna hurt ya! I'm gonna hurt your career! I'm gonna destroy your career, right the fuck in!

    Journey into the Overlooked 6 hotel. The most stylish and effectively photographed horror film of our generation.

    Michael: (Speaking with his index finger) REDROCKER!! REDROCKER!!

    Sammy: Hereeeeee's Hagarrrr!!!

    Coming soon to a theatre near you!!


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  9. #9
    Eruption Bassman's Avatar
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    04.12.16 @ 04:42 PM
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    Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones reprise their roles as secret government agents in "Men In Black, Red & White."

    Last time, their job was to keep the existence of aliens a secret from the public.

    This time, they face a much tougher test: Keeping the happenings at Area 5150 secret from the public!

    See how they masterfully use disinformation, lies, mind control, and state-of-the-art disguises to confuse even the most die-hard fans:

    [Clip of Sammy saying "they've already kicked him out of the band. They couldn't finish the record." After the interviewer leaves, "Sammy" pulls off his mask, revealing Will Smith, who turns and winks at the camera.]

    [More clips:
    -Tommy Lee Jones holding Brad Starks upside-down over the edge of a building calmly telling him "now repeat after me: No News Is Good News."

    -Will Smith zaps Sherman with a device which puts him in a state of suspended animation.

    -A close up of a sweating Gary Cherone saying "It's not my job to speak for Van Halen." The camera zooms out to show Smith and Jones standing behind him, arms crossed, nodding in approval.]

    Coming to a theater near you...we just can't tell you WHEN.

    ------------------
    "Big double-take but 'ya keep on walkin', I'm in love..."
    --DLR, So This Is Love

    "That's the thing about self-improvement. Don't get me wrong, I plan to get some soon"
    --DLR, Can't Get This Stuff No More

    [This message has been edited by Bassman (edited September 21, 2000 at 06:12 PM).]

  10. #10
    Atomic Punk Wolfman's Avatar
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    07.20.17 @ 03:43 PM
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    Wolfman Pictures Worldwide presents:
    "The Blair Halen Project"
    This creepy documentary style film takes place deep in the woods outside 5150, where the locals discuss rumors of an alleged return of former frontman David Lee Roth. Although difficult to get many to discuss the rumors, one thing is for sure - They all believe the rumors, but none of them can confirm anything with actual sightings of the mysterious blonde legend.

    Pan to a tent deep in the woods, surrounded by eerie =VH= stick icons hanging from the trees. Inside the tent sit Ed, Al, and Mike, who have decided to see if there is any truth to the rumors themselves - It is dark, and the boys are all alone -lost with no sense of direction. Suddenly hushed cries in the distance elicit the group from their tent in sheer panic! They run under a power other than their own towards the mysterious murmurs. Ed leads the pack, eyes wide with horror, and a harrowing cry escapes from his trembling lips - DAAAAAAVVE! DAAAAAVE! DAAAAAAVE!!!!!!!

    Cut to a close-up image of Ray Danniels, snot running down his nose, weeping frantically - "I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!"



    ------------------

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    *gulp* - Down In Flames

    "Come on FORD, tell us how you really feel." - Said by virtually every member of VHLinks at one time or another.

  11. #11
    Top Of The World
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    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
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    Hmmmm...I think the first one I'll see is Men in Red, Black & White....and then "We Still Don't Know What You Did This Summer"

    ------------------
    "My belligerent enthusiasm is as optimistic as ever" - DLR

 

 

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