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  1. #1
    Atomic Punk
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    Default Penis Sizes By State: How Does Yours Measure Up?

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/1...n_4379664.html

    1. North Dakota
    2. Rhode Island
    3. South Dakota
    4. District of Columbia
    5. Massachusetts
    6. Ohio
    7. Arizona
    8. Alabama
    9. New York
    10. South Carolina
    11. Colorado
    12. Maryland
    13. Wisconsin
    14. New Jersey
    15. California
    16. Florida
    17. Connecticut
    18. Virginia
    19. Oregon
    20. Pennsylvania
    21. Washington
    22. Tennessee
    23. New Mexico
    24. Iowa
    25. Illinois
    26. Louisiana
    27. Vermont
    28. Utah
    29. Maine
    30. Nebraska
    31. Idaho
    32. Kansas
    33. Delaware
    34. Michigan
    35. Nevada
    36. New Hampshire
    37. Oklahoma
    38. Montana
    39. Minnesota
    40. Kentucky
    41. Texas
    42. Indiana
    43. West Virginia
    44. Missouri
    45. Alaska
    46. North Carolina
    47. Wyoming
    48. Arkansas
    49. Hawaii
    50. Mississippi
    "Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.” -- Gen. George S. Patton

  2. #2
    Baluchitherium Ted Van Halen's Avatar
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    At least SC is top ten somewhere. Wonder why Georgia didn't make the list?
    -TVH-


    If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace. -Thomas Paine


    What is government itself but the greatest of all reflections on human nature? - James Madison


    Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the Government take care of him better take a closer look at the American Indian. - Henry Ford

  3. #3
    ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ Number 47's Avatar
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    Stupid. I know someone from Mississippi with a very large penis.

  4. #4
    Forum Frontman fudd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ted Van Halen View Post
    At least SC is top ten somewhere. Wonder why Georgia didn't make the list?
    Don't they kinda have to being part of the United States.

  5. #5
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fuddman5150 View Post
    Don't they kinda have to being part of the United States.
    BA-ZING!

    LowLifeFlatHeadScum

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  6. #6
    Baluchitherium Ted Van Halen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fuddman5150 View Post
    Don't they kinda have to being part of the United States.
    I see DC on there and the list only goes to 50. Georgia is missing.
    -TVH-


    If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace. -Thomas Paine


    What is government itself but the greatest of all reflections on human nature? - James Madison


    Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the Government take care of him better take a closer look at the American Indian. - Henry Ford

  7. #7
    ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ Number 47's Avatar
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    Default The Correct List

    Georgia should be #24

    1. North Dakota
    2. Rhode Island
    3. South Dakota
    4. District of Columbia
    5. Massachusetts
    6. Ohio
    7. Arizona
    8. Alabama
    9. New York
    10. South Carolina

    11. Colorado: Mountainous members.
    12. Maryland: The proximity to D.C. must be rubbing off.
    13: Wisconsin: Don't be offended the next time someone calls you "cheesehead."
    14. New Jersey: Hey, fuggedaboudit.
    15. California: California love.
    16. Florida: Good overall, but disappointing since the state's shaped like a penis.
    17: Connecticut: Land of steady habits and middling penis size.
    18. Virginia: Virginia is for lovers. Slightly above-average lovers.
    19. Oregon: The Oregon Trail doesn't lead to exceptional penis size. #BeaverState.
    20. Pennsylvania: Home to the Pirates, and other disappointments.
    21. Washington: We see what you're doing with that Space Needle, Seattle.
    22. Tennessee: Known for country and rock 'n' roll. And now, the blues.
    23. New Mexico: "Land of Enchantment" refers mostly to the desert, FYI.
    24. Georgia: "Time" thinks there are no penises in Georgia. Well, they're wrong.
    25. Iowa: Where corn is king... of innuendo.
    26. Illinois: Have you heard the good news about the penis church?
    27. Louisiana: Somehow we thought things would be bigger in the Big Easy.
    28. Vermont: Let's not make Green Mountains out of molehills.
    29. Utah: Average wieners, but at least the women are beautiful... however...
    30. Maine: If "you can't get there from here," don't be surprised.
    31. Nebraska: More corn. More innuendo.
    32. Idaho: Long on potatoes. Meat? Not so much.
    33. Kansas: What's the matter with Kansas? Small penises.
    34. Delaware: Mediocre ranking, but c'mon... it's Delaware.
    35. Michigan: You know there had to be a tradeoff for the 2013 Lions season.
    36. Nevada: And you thought one-night-stands in Vegas were a gamble before...
    37. New Hampshire: Live free or die of shame.
    38. Oklahoma: OOOOOklahoma where not many people have large penises.
    39. Montana: Not so mountainous.
    40. Minnesota: Not so nice.
    41. Kentucky: Original recipe for disaster? Some sad lil' nuggets.
    42. Texas: Not everything is bigger in Texas.
    43. Indiana: Hoosiers lose. Hoosiers lose...
    44. West Virginia: As if West Virginia didn't have it hard enough.
    45. Missouri: Not much to see in the "Show Me State."
    46. Alaska: That rugged exterior hides a lie.
    47. North Carolina: South Carolina is like ROFLCOPTER.
    48. Wyoming: Big sky, little else.
    49. Arkansas: Don't worry, you have personality.
    50. Hawaii: Prophetically, "aloha" means "hello" and "goodbye."
    51. Mississippi: lol...

  8. #8
    Atomic Punk ziggysmalls's Avatar
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    Ohio is number 6?

    Surely fans of the SEC will be bitching that we don't deserve our ranking due to our "soft" schedule.

  9. #9
    Atomic Punk bsbll4's Avatar
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    Default

    Rhode Island is only nunber two because everything looks big when you're in Rhode Island. It's an optical illusion.
    CNN may think my opinion matters, but you shouldn't.

  10. #10
    Good Enough pickslide's Avatar
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ziggysmalls View Post
    Ohio is number 6?

    Surely fans of the SEC will be bitching that we don't deserve our ranking due to our "soft" schedule.
    No, we quite accept the ruling, because most Ohio State fans are big dicks. Present company excluded, of course.



    Also, in this instance a "soft schedule" is to your advantage...

    TK

  11. #11
    Forum Frontman Double Down's Avatar
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    Default

    Easily one of the funniest stories ever posted here. The commentary at that link has some hilarious shit in there. Love the Massachusetts caption.
    .
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    .
    VH with Dave ('78-'84) - The best years....the "real" VH.
    VH with Sam ('86-'96) - Incredible era....."We have renamed this town 'New Halen!'.
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    VH with Wolf/Dave ('12-'15) - Amazing comeback. Smokin' album and tours.

  12. #12
    Sinner's Swing! Darkstar's Avatar
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ted Van Halen View Post
    At least SC is top ten somewhere. Wonder why Georgia didn't make the list?
    Apparently Georgia is a dick-less state......
    Love should NOT be work, it should be as easy as breathing Dave's Dreidel

    My god, our government has less secrets than Van Halen. Emperor Brett

    I'm a Democrat and an Atheist, but I've yet to receive my ticket to Hell. Is this something I call Live Nation about or what? JakeK21

    I feel it takes far more energy to hate than love. Well outside of Obamacare, How Many Say I and Heineken beer. ziggysmalls

  13. #13
    Emperor of VHLinks.com Brett's Avatar
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    Default

    I guess not everything is bigger in Texas.

    Edit..I missed someone said that already...woops.
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  14. #14
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Number 47 View Post
    16. Florida: Good overall, but disappointing since the state's shaped like a penis.
    Fucker. Ya joke-blocked me.
    LowLifeFlatHeadScum

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