Follow us on...
Follow us on Twitter Follow us on Facebook Watch us on YouTube
Register
Page 1 of 4 1234 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 60
  1. #1
    carpe damn diem billy007's Avatar
    Join Date
    04.19.00
    Age
    54
    Location
    On the wild card line...
    Posts
    28,669
    Favorite VH Song

    "Dance The Night Away"
    Last Online

    12.12.17 @ 09:42 AM
    Likes
    1,045
    Liked 1,345 Times in 922 Posts

    Default Sinead O'Connor On the Hunt for Sex

    from billboard.com:



    Sinead O'Connor is looking for, well, what Justin Bieber might call a snake named Johnson: the Irish singer has taken to her website and Twitter account to make a public inquiry and search for a good man and a good time.

    She explains her situation in a post on her website: "I recently read of a woman in America who married and regularly humps her truck. I don't yet own a truck but I'm beginning to understand her head space. And am worried I too may be so desperate for sex that within days I might run up the road and hump Bray Cab's whole fleet in one hour."

    O'Connor claims that her sex life is "so dire" that "inanimate objects are starting to look good" and laments that she's "in the peak of her sexual prime and way too lovely to be living like a nun." Luckily, she's also admitted an affinity for men, but not just any man. O'Connor's standards are high and at times bizarrely specific, including some expected ones:


    "He must be no younger than 44."

    "Has to be employed. Am not fussy in what capacity generally but vehicle clampers need not apply."

    "No hair dye."

    And some unusual demands:

    "Must not be named Brian or Nigel."

    "I like me a hairy man so buffed and/or waxed need not apply."

    "Must be very 'snuggly'. Not just wham-bam."

    "Must be wham-bam."

    Wait, what? As if it all weren't confusing enough already, O'Connor has been through three husbands, announced she was a lesbian in 2000, and later clarified to Entertainment Weekly in 2005 that she was merely "three-quarters heterosexual, one-quarter gay." She explains on her website that she's "in fact 99.999% vaginally oriented but has experienced the odd shall we say 'bark up the wrong tree' and immensely enjoyed it."

    If her website wasn't shocking enough, O'Connor has also taken to Twitter, where she's accumulated more than 3000 followers and more than 300 tweets since making her dilemma public. There, O'Connor hardly holds back, with posts that are far more graphic than what you might find on her website regarding everything from her attraction to Robert Downey, Jr. and Dave Chappelle, to the types of applicants she's getting: "V odd offer guy wants 2 pork me wearing JP2 mask. Psychiatrist urgently needed..."

    O'Connor has already found one successful applicant, but after the winner admitted he had a pregnant girlfriend, the deal was off. But if you're interested, don't fret; O'Connor is still taking applications, but you "must have a sweet heart and filthy mind." Good luck. You're going to need it.


    words escape me!

  2. #2
    ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ Number 47's Avatar
    Join Date
    10.08.06
    Posts
    29,801
    Last Online

    12.12.17 @ 01:35 PM
    Likes
    1,874
    Liked 6,823 Times in 3,568 Posts


    Premium Member

    Default

    I know this thread will not be nice, but I'd like to say that The Lion And The Cobra is one of the best records I have in my LP collection. Can't believe it's been almost twenty five years since I took a wild chance at the record store on that one, just for the unknown bald chick on the cover... which back then was very rare.

    Anyway... good luck with your quest Sinead, but when did you turn into Billy Jean King?

  3. #3
    Atomic Punk Little Dreamer's Avatar
    Join Date
    12.25.99
    Age
    45
    Location
    Pasadena, CA, USA
    Posts
    8,932
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Hear About It Later
    Last Online

    12.12.17 @ 03:57 PM
    Likes
    991
    Liked 1,384 Times in 759 Posts

    Default

    Did this woman eat Sinead? It can't be her. She used to be beautiful, despite her shaved head. This is not a good way to start my day. Upset.
    Little Dreamer

  4. #4
    Baluchitherium loveevhsince79's Avatar
    Join Date
    09.22.04
    Location
    Cols, OH
    Posts
    5,420
    Last Online

    10.23.15 @ 04:49 PM
    Likes
    2
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    I find it hard to believe that any woman is unable to get laid if she wants too. Go sit in a bar from about 12:30 to 2:30 Sinead. I know there will be some guy willing to take a chance on you.
    Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.

    Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly.

  5. #5
    Sinner's Swing! chewbaccamonkeylunch's Avatar
    Join Date
    12.06.01
    Location
    Weatherford, TX
    Posts
    3,839
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning and Balance (Tie)
    Favorite VH Song

    Summer Nights (LWAN)
    Last Online

    02.16.16 @ 06:50 AM
    Likes
    15
    Liked 5 Times in 3 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Little Dreamer View Post
    Did this woman eat Sinead?
    The trashman was my hero.......
    -Seenbad

  6. #6
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
    Join Date
    03.08.04
    Location
    Secret Witness Protection Location
    Posts
    31,731
    Favorite VH Album

    Anything Mike played on
    Favorite VH Song

    Anything Mike played on
    Last Online

    07.30.17 @ 08:59 PM
    Likes
    34
    Liked 60 Times in 35 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    You know the world's in need of an enema when Mrs Doubtfire takes to the web in a quest to get the nasty on.
    LowLifeFlatHeadScum

    [sigpic][/sigpic]


    Your Hacked Nude Photo Here!

  7. #7
    5150 adamvhcornell's Avatar
    Join Date
    09.06.06
    Age
    45
    Location
    Toledo Ohio
    Posts
    583
    Favorite VH Album

    f.u.c.k.
    Favorite VH Song

    cant get this stuff no more
    Last Online

    02.02.14 @ 01:29 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    hey now! big girls give great head!!

  8. #8
    Forum Frontman fudd's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.22.08
    Age
    38
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    14,260
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair warning, 5150
    Favorite VH Song

    HAIL, love walks in, 5150
    Last Online

    @
    Likes
    1,316
    Liked 6,302 Times in 3,170 Posts


    Premium Member

    Donor

    Default

    I would rather sodomize myself with a backhoe than pork this bitch.

  9. #9
    Eruption donkost's Avatar
    Join Date
    03.28.08
    Age
    54
    Location
    Eastern PA
    Posts
    1,350
    Last Online

    12.10.17 @ 08:16 PM
    Likes
    174
    Liked 93 Times in 37 Posts

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by fuddman5150 View Post
    I would rather sodomize myself with a backhoe than pork this bitch.
    __________________
    And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.
    When your reply is read along with your signature line, it's such a beautiful sentiment. LMAO

  10. #10
    Good Enough
    Join Date
    03.12.04
    Posts
    1,584
    Last Online

    12.11.17 @ 05:18 PM
    Likes
    10
    Liked 214 Times in 92 Posts

    Default

    Jesus that's a rough ride, I don't think I could do it. I've seen trannies more attractive than that...just sayin.

  11. #11
    Emperor of VHLinks.com Brett's Avatar
    Join Date
    09.02.99
    Age
    46
    Location
    Somewhere Near LA
    Posts
    68,691
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Unchained
    Last Online

    12.12.17 @ 03:41 PM
    Likes
    1,263
    Liked 11,545 Times in 4,919 Posts

    Default

    Who is that beast? Did it eat Sinead O'Connor?
    Webmaster
    VHLinks.com - Your Van Halen Internet Resource Guide
    http://www.vhlinks.com

    JamToThis.com
    Audio/Video Trading Community
    Tons of Van Halen!

  12. #12
    Forum Frontman fudd's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.22.08
    Age
    38
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    14,260
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair warning, 5150
    Favorite VH Song

    HAIL, love walks in, 5150
    Last Online

    @
    Likes
    1,316
    Liked 6,302 Times in 3,170 Posts


    Premium Member

    Donor

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by donkost View Post
    When your reply is read along with your signature line, it's such a beautiful sentiment. LMAO
    It's the last lyric from the last Beatles song ever made together.

  13. #13
    Sinner's Swing! Bullwinkle's Avatar
    Join Date
    03.08.07
    Location
    698 Sycamore Road, San Pueblo, CA
    Posts
    2,789
    Favorite VH Album

    Sound Magazine
    Favorite VH Song

    I Think I Love You
    Last Online

    06.07.15 @ 10:30 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 2 Times in 1 Post

    Default

    [i]
    Quote Originally Posted by Sinead "Man Hands" O'Connor
    I too may be so desperate for sex that within days I might run up the road and hump Bray Cab's whole fleet in one hour."

    The only thing more horrible than getting naked with the woman(?) in the picture above, would be seeing her masturbate on a taxi cab in a parking lot in broad daylight.

    Fellows, one of us has to step up and prevent this from happening. I nominate graeme. He lives close to her. All in favor?


    Understand, I'd do it myself if it wasn't for my trick knee...







    Don't read this.

  14. #14
    carpe damn diem billy007's Avatar
    Join Date
    04.19.00
    Age
    54
    Location
    On the wild card line...
    Posts
    28,669
    Favorite VH Song

    "Dance The Night Away"
    Last Online

    12.12.17 @ 09:42 AM
    Likes
    1,045
    Liked 1,345 Times in 922 Posts

    Default

    trying to figure out what's going on with her left arm there - is that some kind of tattoo, or does she have the set list written on her arm, kind of like a quarterback?

  15. #15
    Baluchitherium
    Join Date
    09.24.02
    Location
    North Central OKC
    Posts
    4,582
    Favorite VH Album

    VH, WACF, FW, 5150, OU812
    Favorite VH Song

    Dreams/Unchained/InASR/5150
    Last Online

    11.25.17 @ 04:30 AM
    Likes
    290
    Liked 298 Times in 161 Posts

    Default I'm keepin' it about the music...

    Quote Originally Posted by Number 47 View Post
    I know this thread will not be nice, but I'd like to say that The Lion And The Cobra is one of the best records I have in my LP collection. Can't believe it's been almost twenty five years since I took a wild chance at the record store on that one, just for the unknown bald chick on the cover... which back then was very rare.
    EXCELLENT ALBUM! I listen to it to this day. "Just Like You Said It Would Be", "Mandinka", "Jerusalem", "Troy"...so many great songs.

    "The shit I read on this site." -- Dave's Dreidel (Nov 6th, 2013)

    "Don't ever confuse talent with fame." -- Bob Lefsetz

    "There's very little greatness in this world, but in the crucible of quality there's a special corner reserved for Van Halen." -- Bob Lefsetz

 

 

Similar Threads

  1. Van Halen /Helen Hunt connection
    By VHfan79 in forum Main VH Discussion
    Replies: 79
    Last Post: 05.16.07, 01:44 PM
  2. Justice Sandra Day O'Connor retiring....
    By Dennis in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 07.04.05, 04:38 PM
  3. Somebody hunt Eddie down!
    By Sam Rocker in forum Main VH Discussion
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 02.21.03, 02:59 PM
  4. Impossible (?) Scavenger Hunt CONTEST!!!
    By FH in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 11.12.02, 09:55 AM
  5. wolf hunt...part II
    By strangegrey in forum Guitar Room
    Replies: 30
    Last Post: 03.08.02, 05:20 AM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •