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  1. #1
    Atomic Punk
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    My Lindsay Lohan comeback movie/vehicle idea...

    It's a no-brainer...

    a Private Benjamin redo...

    Where she can play a role that closely mimics her own life... Judy Benjamin, a Hollywood child star gone bad once the spotlight faded and the public became jaded... When the "crazy" judge finally snaps, she's is given two choices; Join The Army, or go to jail for 3 years...

    She chooses the Army...

    "Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.” -- Gen. George S. Patton

  2. #2
    Atomic Punk Eddymon's Avatar
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    Only if she shows her tits like Goldie did, and has a nice lesbian scene with Angelina Jolie who plays her drill sargeant.
    'Old Van Halen, when I was in it-classic Van Halen-makes you wanna drink, dance and screw, right? And the new Van Halen encourages you to drink milk, drive a Nissan and have a relationship.' - David Lee Roth.

  3. #3
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eddymon View Post
    Only if she shows her tits like Goldie did, and has a nice lesbian scene with Angelina Jolie who plays her drill sargeant.
    Did she show her tiny, goose-bump teets in Private Benjamin? I thought we didn't see those until Wildcats.
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  4. #4
    Atomic Punk Eddymon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LLFHS View Post
    Did she show her tiny, goose-bump teets in Private Benjamin? I thought we didn't see those until Wildcats.
    Maybe I'm wrong, but wasn't there a shower scene, maybe I am thinking of the male version of that movie. STRIPES.
    'Old Van Halen, when I was in it-classic Van Halen-makes you wanna drink, dance and screw, right? And the new Van Halen encourages you to drink milk, drive a Nissan and have a relationship.' - David Lee Roth.

  5. #5
    Atomic Punk
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    Parents Guide for Private Benjamin

    Sex & Nudity
    Rated R-Sexual Content, Language and Some Nudity

    - A man and woman have sex. (We hear moaning and see thrusting, no nudity visible.)

    - A brief scene takes place in a shower-room where we see multiple nude women. (Breasts and buttocks are briefly seen.)

    - People walk in on a man and woman making out. (The woman is topless, but her hands are covering her breasts.)

    - Man and woman have sex. (Moaning and thrusting are present, as well as a brief shot of the woman's breast.)

    - A man attempts to rape a woman on an airplane, but does not succeed.

    Violence & Gore
    An attempted rape scene near the end of the film.

    A woman punches a man in the mouth.

    Profanity
    Some strong language such as f*ck is present, but not used excessively.

    Milder language (i.e. sh*t, hell, damn, etc.) is also used moderately throughout.

    Alcohol/Drugs/Smoking
    Cigarette smoking is present.

    One scene takes place in a bar, other uses of alcohol throughout.

    Frightening/Intense Scenes
    The attempted rape scene may be intense to some viewers.
    "Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.” -- Gen. George S. Patton

  6. #6
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eddymon View Post
    Maybe I'm wrong, but wasn't there a shower scene, maybe I am thinking of the male version of that movie. STRIPES.
    Oh, I wish I was a loofa!
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  7. #7
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by voivod View Post
    Parents Guide for Private Benjamin

    Sex & Nudity
    Rated R-Sexual Content, Language and Some Nudity

    - A man and woman have sex. (We hear moaning and see thrusting, no nudity visible.)

    - A brief scene takes place in a shower-room where we see multiple nude women. (Breasts and buttocks are briefly seen.)

    - People walk in on a man and woman making out. (The woman is topless, but her hands are covering her breasts.)

    - Man and woman have sex. (Moaning and thrusting are present, as well as a brief shot of the woman's breast.)

    - A man attempts to rape a woman on an airplane, but does not succeed.

    Violence & Gore
    An attempted rape scene near the end of the film.

    A woman punches a man in the mouth.

    Profanity
    Some strong language such as f*ck is present, but not used excessively.

    Milder language (i.e. sh*t, hell, damn, etc.) is also used moderately throughout.

    Alcohol/Drugs/Smoking
    Cigarette smoking is present.

    One scene takes place in a bar, other uses of alcohol throughout.

    Frightening/Intense Scenes
    The attempted rape scene may be intense to some viewers.

    Aaaaand, I have my new title.
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  8. #8
    Atomic Punk
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    Quote Originally Posted by LLFHS View Post
    Aaaaand, I have my new title.
    hahahaha
    "Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.” -- Gen. George S. Patton

  9. #9
    Baluchitherium Scott's Avatar
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    There is only one way to revive her career...and I must say that she DOES have acting chops - and is hot. However, her massive messed up personal life has derailed this potentially brilliant actress.

    The answer is simple, two words, Quinten Tarantino. Look what he did for Travolta, Samuel Jackson (one of my favorites) and Uma....he will straighten her out, get her to perform and hopefully result in another kick ass movie (of his).
    Winners come and go; legends are forever.

  10. #10
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
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    The differences between Freckle-Tits and Vinnie Barbarino though (besides the obvious) is that Travolta was only guilty of slipping into obscurity in the 80's, I'd imagine, though I dont know the guy, that while working pn Pulp Fiction, he probably showed up for work on time, had a professional attitude, and I'm reasonably certain he didnt try to mow anyone down in a Mercedes while hopped up on the booger-sugar.
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  11. #11
    Good Enough VH Wahoo's Avatar
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  12. #12
    Atomic Punk
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    She's going to be living on Tom Seizmore's couch in a flea-bag motel.

    Comebacks cannot be manufactured. Remeber Yasmine Bleeth? It has taken her 14 years to get to a place where she could stage a comeback.

    Robert Downey Jr had to take small parts to rehab his career after being a high-paid leading man.

    Lindsey doesn't think that she's done anything wrong. I predict that within six months she will be right back in the can again.
    "Nothing is ever what it seems but everything is exactly what it is." - B. Banzai


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  13. #13
    Good Enough cabomiro's Avatar
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    http://www.torontosun.com/entertainm.../14881241.html


    Lindsay Lohan is in a new movie, directed by the ShamWow guy.

    TMZ reports Vince Shlomi (also known as Vince Offer) met Lohan in Cannes in May and spoke with her about being in a project called the Underground Comedy Movie 2010. The website reports Lindsay plays a "gun-toting Marilyn Monroe" who shoots at paparazzi.

    Production stills show Lohan wearing the iconic short white dress and heels, while also donning her SCRAM bracelet.

    The photos also show Shlomi showing Lohan how he wants her to pose for certain parts of the scene.

    There is no record of the film in the Internet Movie Database (IMDB) and no release date has been set.

    But Shlomi has produced a similar movie before.

    In 1999, the ShamWow and SlapChop spokesman wrote and directed a movie called The Underground Comedy Movie. It is described as "a series of comedic short films guaranteed to offend."

    That film won a B-Movie Award for best celebrity cameo with Joey Buttafuoco, who made headlines in 1992 for his affair with teenager Amy Fisher.

    The New York Post reviewed the movie and said it "may be the least amusing comedy ever made."
    Cabo x 20
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  14. #14
    Gird your loins Daisy Hill's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Axxman300 View Post
    She's going to be living on Tom Seizmore's couch in a flea-bag motel.

    Comebacks cannot be manufactured. Remeber Yasmine Bleeth? It has taken her 14 years to get to a place where she could stage a comeback.

    Robert Downey Jr had to take small parts to rehab his career after being a high-paid leading man.

    Lindsey doesn't think that she's done anything wrong. I predict that within six months she will be right back in the can again.

    Robert Downey Jr was able to make his comeback because his good friend Mel Gibson personally put up all the dough to fund the completion bond for the uninsurable RDJ

    survivor of the Bowling Green Massacre 9-3-2016 BGSU 10 OSU 77

    She was warned. She was given an explanation. Nevertheless, she persisted.

  15. #15
    Atomic Punk Viking's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Daisy Hill View Post
    Robert Downey Jr was able to make his comeback because his good friend Mel Gibson personally put up all the dough to fund the completion bond for the uninsurable RDJ
    Mel may be a bit of an asshole, but he's also done some good things. He helped out Robert Downey Jr. and I believe he was also there for Brittany Spears when she was at a low point.
    "Viking - last to sleep, first to rise, last to leave, that's how the Nords of old rocked the house." ~ timmac in the 'Texas Linkers' thread talking about yours truly. :-)

 

 

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