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Thread: True Story

  1. #1
    Eruption lacy_vious's Avatar
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    03.01.11 @ 01:34 PM
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    Default True Story

    A friend of mine forwarded a message from his uncle that, if I hadn't heard about the characters involved before I would have believed it to be one of those joke forwarded messages. It's so amusing I have to share.

    Subject: Nanners

    Well, I needed the break I just wasn't planning to take it yet, now I need a vacation! As you know Nanners likes to be near to me as much as she can and I like that so I let her. She had been feeling poorly but had been a trooper all day while I painted the walls white (bright white) she had found a spot on the moving pad that I put down for her and she just watched me, the togetherness was nice. I came to a point where I needed to move some furniture and the ladder around so she dutifully moved as requested, when I was resettled in my new location she came over to get comfy. Unfortunately she bumped her head into the freshly painted wall, I reached around to see what the damage was to the wall and to her head. She thought that I was going to pet her and she sat down to allow me the full privilege. Neither of us noticed as her tail dipped into the 3/4 full paint can. Well shit! OK, off to the kitchen we go to clean her tail and head. I lead so that she would follow, first mistake. She sauntered around and bumped into as many things as she could find. Paint all over the place! When I raised my voice to get her over to me she thought somehow that I may be angry, scared the shit right out of her! All over the floor. OK, regroup and do it calmly so we don't make things worse. Happily she saw the Daddy was not mad just excited so she rejoiced, wagging her tail like a god dam machine gun. The paint flew in every which direction and landed all over my new dark chocolate stained cherry cabinets, thousands of spots, not the look I was going for. Well Shit! she had been strategically positioned so that we got full coverage on three walls of cabinets, the dishwasher and the microwave that had been placed low to be handy for use and cleaning. Quick decision, clean the cabinets before the paint dries or the tail before the problem gets worse? Mistake number two! When diluted with water and wagged by a happy dog, paint goes much much farther! Now triple the spots need to be removed and I can't grab the tail with out scaring more shit out of her. I concentrate on the tail so that I can eliminate new problems before they happen, Mistake number three, Unclad foot finds a warm and mushy spot on the otherwise cold hard tile floor, what could that be? Here's a hint it is the same color as my cabinets use to be! I give up, I look to see if her tail is clean and let her go into the other room, you know where the carpet is! I scrub and scrub, I wipe and pick up and think I'm done, Mistake number four! I hadn't checked her head, but she is a good girl and wiped it off for me, I'll let you figure where, we do have a pretty good carpet cleaner right? I only need to finish about three feet of wall to be done with the room I was painting but I need a nap more.

  2. #2
    Girl Gone Bad smithjc's Avatar
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    10.08.15 @ 02:17 PM
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    Wow whatta mess!! It's kinda amusing though.
    RIP - Classic Van Halen

    "A lot of people take Van Halen more seriously than we do." The Diamond One



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