Follow us on...
Follow us on Twitter Follow us on Facebook Watch us on YouTube
Register
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 26
  1. #1
    Unchained 5150jeff's Avatar
    Join Date
    09.01.07
    Age
    51
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    526
    Favorite VH Song

    I'm the one
    Last Online

    01.06.11 @ 05:09 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts


    Donor

    Default police arrest mich.man for vacuum sex!

    THOMAS TOWNSHIP, Mich. – Police say a Michigan man has been arrested after "receiving sexual favors from a vacuum" at a car wash.LOL

    The Saginaw News reports the 29-year-old Swan Creek Township man was arrested Thursday in Saginaw County's Thomas Township, about 90 miles northwest of Detroit.

    Police Sgt. Gary Breidinger says a resident called to report suspicious activity at the car wash about 6:45 a.m. An officer approached on foot and caught the man in the act.

    The suspect, whose name wasn't immediately released, is being held in the Saginaw County Jail.

    THOMAS TOWNSHIP, Mich. – Police say a Michigan man has been arrested after "receiving sexual favors from a vacuum" at a car wash.

    The Saginaw News reports the 29-year-old Swan Creek Township man was arrested Thursday in Saginaw County's Thomas Township, about 90 miles northwest of Detroit.

    Police Sgt. Gary Breidinger says a resident called to report suspicious activity at the car wash about 6:45 a.m. An officer approached on foot and caught the man in the act.

    The suspect, whose name wasn't immediately released, is being held in the Saginaw County Jail. What a moron hahahahahahahah!
    http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081018/...odd_vacuum_sex
    Last edited by 5150jeff; 10.19.08 at 08:53 AM.

  2. #2
    Atomic Punk onefootoutthedoor's Avatar
    Join Date
    12.15.01
    Age
    42
    Location
    Surf City, USA
    Posts
    8,033
    Last Online

    07.24.15 @ 10:25 PM
    Likes
    10
    Liked 10 Times in 3 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    Police say the man was distraught after being repeatedly banned from a Van Halen fan website.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  3. #3
    Atomic Punk ZeoBandit's Avatar
    Join Date
    01.29.02
    Age
    41
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    17,830
    Favorite VH Album

    F.U.C.K.
    Favorite VH Song

    Humans Being
    Last Online

    12.14.17 @ 05:57 AM
    Likes
    54
    Liked 40 Times in 29 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    That is wrong on so many levels. He'd be getting his car dirty, right after getting it cleaned!
    "What we are dealing with here, is a complete lack of respect for the law" - Jackie Gleason, Smokey and the Bandit

    www.geocaching.com - The site where you are the search engine.

  4. #4
    ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ Number 47's Avatar
    Join Date
    10.08.06
    Posts
    29,833
    Last Online

    12.14.17 @ 02:59 PM
    Likes
    1,881
    Liked 6,840 Times in 3,580 Posts


    Premium Member
    I don't know! I've been good to my vacuum, changed it's bags and belts on a regulat basis... given it a nice closet to live in... but when it comes to sex... she gets all aggresive with that damn rotating brush and I can't get near her.

    She can be so cold and mechanical at the most imtimate of times.


  5. #5
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
    Join Date
    03.08.04
    Location
    Secret Witness Protection Location
    Posts
    31,731
    Favorite VH Album

    Anything Mike played on
    Favorite VH Song

    Anything Mike played on
    Last Online

    07.30.17 @ 08:59 PM
    Likes
    34
    Liked 60 Times in 35 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    Sucks.
    LowLifeFlatHeadScum

    [sigpic][/sigpic]


    Your Hacked Nude Photo Here!

  6. #6
    Atomic Punk BREW CREW's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.09.00
    Age
    45
    Posts
    11,665
    Favorite VH Album

    Van Halen 1
    Favorite VH Song

    Somebody Get Me A Doctor
    Last Online

    08.27.17 @ 09:39 AM
    Likes
    45
    Liked 185 Times in 105 Posts

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by onefootoutthedoor View Post
    Police say the man was distraught after being repeatedly banned from a Van Halen fan website.
    Dude!
    Just go for it!

  7. #7
    Romeo Delight
    Join Date
    10.19.03
    Age
    43
    Location
    Bryan, Ohio
    Posts
    120
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Humans Being
    Last Online

    07.19.15 @ 05:22 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by LowLifeFlatHeadScum View Post
    Sucks.
    LOL!

  8. #8
    Good Enough
    Join Date
    02.15.08
    Age
    49
    Location
    Virginia
    Posts
    1,943
    Favorite VH Song

    Drop Dead Legs
    Last Online

    01.06.12 @ 02:10 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default

    Penis's and vacuums are never a good mix.... I've been in the ER when men have gotten frisky with the hoover... it is something to stay away from... you are better off using what God gave you if you become "needy"....

    although- if you do not want to be needy ever again...go ahead stick your penis in the business end of a vacuum...the ER doc will most likely send you to surgery and have them remove it. Problem solved!
    Model Citizen, Zero Discipline


    "***"...now please take off my VanHalen t-shirt, before you jinx the band and they break up..." (The wedding singer)"

    *Thanks SNIC for my AWESOME new avatar!*

  9. #9
    Good Enough avhevhmashdlr's Avatar
    Join Date
    04.28.04
    Age
    29
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    2,127
    Favorite VH Album

    Women and Children First
    Favorite VH Song

    Somebody Get Me a Doctor
    Last Online

    03.10.14 @ 08:22 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    wait- arent the car wash vaccums pretty damn strong? why would you do that to your manliness? what sick fu--- oh, wait, The Dude. sorry for the partial rant.
    [On the House Un-American Activities Committee] "They'll nail anyone who ever scratched his ass during the National Anthem."- Humphrey Bogart
    The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, "You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done".- George Carlin
    "I just think people should be very free with sex. They should draw the line at goats." - Elton John
    "I'm just trying to figure out why you donít have any clothes on," the deputy said.

    "Me too," Krauss replied.

    "Donít forget! One sperm can ruin your whole day!"

  10. #10
    Atomic Punk Viking's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.21.03
    Age
    52
    Location
    Mound Valley, Kansas
    Posts
    9,043
    Favorite VH Album

    5150, Fair Warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Dance The Night Away, Dreams
    Last Online

    11.02.17 @ 09:45 PM
    Likes
    37
    Liked 28 Times in 9 Posts

    Default

    Oh boy. I'm pretty sure I don't have any relatives in Michigan, so that's a plus.

    A vacuum cleaner in a car wash? Even at home it's a stupid idea, but a car wash? Who knows what kind of shit people vacuum out of their cars. That, and yes, car wash vacuums usually have pretty good suction. Stupid.

    Besides, I don't need a vacuum. The Vikings suck enough.
    "Viking - last to sleep, first to rise, last to leave, that's how the Nords of old rocked the house." ~ timmac in the 'Texas Linkers' thread talking about yours truly. :-)

  11. #11
    Baluchitherium sisca's Avatar
    Join Date
    03.26.04
    Age
    47
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    5,186
    Favorite VH Album

    F.U.C.K.
    Favorite VH Song

    judgement day/ me wise magic
    Last Online

    06.12.16 @ 07:51 PM
    Likes
    1
    Liked 15 Times in 11 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    yeah those car wash vacuums are pretty damn strong. they could probably suck your nuts through your peehole.

    sounds painful to me.
    """"\//-/""""


    The Marines I have seen around the world have the cleanest bodies, the filthiest minds, the highest morale, and the lowest morals of any group of animals I have ever seen. Thank God for the United States Marine Corps!


    www.myspace.com/mikesisca

    "If ladies want Valentines Day so bad either make Superbowl Sunday an actual holiday or give guys Steak and Blowjob Day and we'll call it even." T.RYAN, sharing thoughts on valentine's day.

    " SHUT UP, FAGGOT." - Vinnie Velvet, showing off that sharp wit of his.

    DIRTY SANCHEZ- It's not just for breakfast anymore!



    ď Originally posted by FORD
    History tells us that oppressive nations build walls to keep people IN, not out.
    (See "Berlin Wall" and "Likud Israel" for examples) Ē FORD- when i told him i'd build a wall between the US and Mexico.

    then ill build it from the mexican side. -my reply.

  12. #12
    Atomic Punk Viking's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.21.03
    Age
    52
    Location
    Mound Valley, Kansas
    Posts
    9,043
    Favorite VH Album

    5150, Fair Warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Dance The Night Away, Dreams
    Last Online

    11.02.17 @ 09:45 PM
    Likes
    37
    Liked 28 Times in 9 Posts

    Default

    Maybe this guy was the child of the chronic masturbator from "Slap Shot".
    "Viking - last to sleep, first to rise, last to leave, that's how the Nords of old rocked the house." ~ timmac in the 'Texas Linkers' thread talking about yours truly. :-)

  13. #13
    Baluchitherium
    Join Date
    07.26.07
    Age
    47
    Location
    Las Vegas, NV
    Posts
    4,654
    Favorite VH Album

    VH II
    Favorite VH Song

    Down in Flames
    Last Online

    12.13.17 @ 02:13 AM
    Likes
    1,164
    Liked 200 Times in 83 Posts

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by 5150jeff View Post
    THOMAS TOWNSHIP, Mich. – Police say a Michigan man has been arrested after "receiving sexual favors from a vacuum" at a car wash.
    I think the "receiving" implies that the vacuum was willing. I just can't buy that. I think he should be charged with rape. Although he would have had to put in some money, so perhaps they should impound the vacuum for prostitution.

    Seriously, how'd you like to end up a registered sex offender for the rest of your life because you stuck your wiener in a car wash vac?!

    I guess sex with the patio table was just getting mundane.
    Posted from yo' mama's house.


  14. #14
    Good Enough avhevhmashdlr's Avatar
    Join Date
    04.28.04
    Age
    29
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    2,127
    Favorite VH Album

    Women and Children First
    Favorite VH Song

    Somebody Get Me a Doctor
    Last Online

    03.10.14 @ 08:22 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by VegasVic View Post
    I think the "receiving" implies that the vacuum was willing. I just can't buy that. I think he should be charged with rape. Although he would have had to put in some money, so perhaps they should impound the vacuum for prostitution.

    Seriously, how'd you like to end up a registered sex offender for the rest of your life because you stuck your wiener in a car wash vac?!

    I guess sex with the patio table was just getting mundane.
    [On the House Un-American Activities Committee] "They'll nail anyone who ever scratched his ass during the National Anthem."- Humphrey Bogart
    The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, "You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done".- George Carlin
    "I just think people should be very free with sex. They should draw the line at goats." - Elton John
    "I'm just trying to figure out why you donít have any clothes on," the deputy said.

    "Me too," Krauss replied.

    "Donít forget! One sperm can ruin your whole day!"

  15. #15
    Atomic Punk chefcraig's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.01.02
    Location
    A Confederacy of Dunces
    Posts
    19,370
    Last Online

    03.07.10 @ 06:18 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    I dunno...sometimes after a few beers, I could swear that damned shop-vac is coming on to me. Noisy little sucker, too...

    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
    George Bernard Shaw

 

 

Similar Threads

  1. police arrest man with .491 blood alcohol level
    By voivod in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 07.25.08, 01:43 PM
  2. Depraved Masturbator Breaks Into House, Builds Sex Toy Out Of Vacuum Cleaner
    By chefcraig in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 24
    Last Post: 09.21.07, 05:42 AM
  3. Replies: 7
    Last Post: 09.05.07, 06:24 AM
  4. Flux Capaciters Are For Pussies. All You Need Is A Donut-Shapped Vacuum.
    By Axxman300 in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 08.06.07, 07:41 AM
  5. Pro Athlete Police Arrest thread
    By Pasadena Murdock in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 07.21.02, 12:33 PM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •