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  1. #1
    Atomic Punk
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    05.31.14 @ 08:17 PM
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    Default Creed Bratton(The Office) On How To Pick Band Members.

    If you watch the Office then you know that Creed Bratton is a legend. Anyway,he (or someone writing for him) has a blog called "Creed's Thoughts" on the show official website.

    This one Creed offers tips on putting together a band:

    http://blog.nbc.com/CreedThoughts/20...ts_36.php#more

    January 31, 12:24 PM

    Creed Thoughts



    Being in a band is the greatest, especially if you’re into smoke machines. You’ve got to be careful about who you put in your band, though, because if you get the wrong combination of rockers, you could be in for a lifetime of pain. I made a little guide to help you out when you’re choosing band members.

    Guitarists
    These guys are the toughest to pick. If you’re a guitar player yourself, consider yourself lucky that you don’t need to find one because these dudes have the biggest egos. They’re the ones who want to be front and center all the time. They’re the first ones buying the leather pants and they’re the ones spitting whiskey fireballs at everyone after shows. When you’re finding a guitarist, look for one that says stuff like “Maybe the drummer should be the singer,” or “Sometimes I like to play with my back to the audience because I don’t really like attention.” Trust me, he’s going to work out a lot better than picking the guy that says he wants to dress up like a sexy astronaut at every gig.




    Bass Players
    You want your bass player to be the coolest guy on the stage and the quietest. If it were up to me, kids who were taught to play the bass wouldn’t be allowed to speak for the rest of their lives. There’s something calming a bass player who slaps out the notes without a word. You know why I’m so against bass players speaking? They’re the first guy to steal your lady and the first guy to rat you out to the cops to save their own hides. I know this from experience. They should also be expert head-nodders, as this is a major part of playing the bass.

    Drummers
    When you’re looking for a drummer, you want crazy but not too crazy. You want a beat-keeper that’s going to pull up foxy lady’s skirts with his drumsticks when he passes by, but you don’t want someone that’s going to hit you in the face with those sticks if you tell him he needs some gum. Once in a while you’ll find a drummer who embodies everything that is rock and rock, but most of the time those guys flame out real fast (I miss you, Moonie). Bottom line: make sure whomever you pick can count to four and hold his liquor.

    Keyboardists
    If you put a keyboardist in your band, I will personally kick your ass no matter how old I am. A dude that plays the organ is a different story, but I don’t even have time to tell you to find someone like that. It would take hours.

    Horns Section
    You don’t need them, but for some reason, these guys will always buy the beer. I think they’re just glad they’re not in marching band anymore.

    If you follow my advice, you’re going to wind up with one hell of a band. Just make sure you have a killer name, too, or you can just give up before you start.
    "Nothing is ever what it seems but everything is exactly what it is." - B. Banzai


    My Blog:

    http://axxman300tool.blogspot.com/

    http://www.myspace.com/axxman300

  2. #2
    Forum Frontman
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    Creed is actually a musician and was in a semi-popular band years ago. The details are escaping me now, but I'm sure his bio info is out there.

    I miss The Office!

  3. #3
    Good Enough vhrocker's Avatar
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    01.21.15 @ 08:57 AM
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    Default

    Drummers
    When you’re looking for a drummer, you want crazy but not too crazy. You want a beat-keeper that’s going to pull up foxy lady’s skirts with his drumsticks when he passes by, but you don’t want someone that’s going to hit you in the face with those sticks if you tell him he needs some gum. Once in a while you’ll find a drummer who embodies everything that is rock and rock, but most of the time those guys flame out real fast (I miss you, Moonie). Bottom line: make sure whomever you pick can count to four and hold his liquor.

    ALEX IS GOD!!!

    I've been doin' this for 'bout 20 years now, and I'll tell ya, to this day I still don't know the right drumstick from the left drumstick -Alex Van Halen


  4. #4
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    Default

    Guitarists don't have the "biggest egos" .... singers do.

  5. #5
    Atomic Punk MF5150's Avatar
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    12.14.17 @ 04:54 PM
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    Default

    Bass Players
    You want your bass player to be the coolest guy on the stage and the quietest. If it were up to me, kids who were taught to play the bass wouldn’t be allowed to speak for the rest of their lives. There’s something calming a bass player who slaps out the notes without a word. You know why I’m so against bass players speaking? They’re the first guy to steal your lady and the first guy to rat you out to the cops to save their own hides. I know this from experience. They should also be expert head-nodders, as this is a major part of playing the bass.
    I hear the word "kid" and bass" and I automatically think of Van Halen.... How the mighty VH has fallen...
    Last edited by MF5150; 02.04.08 at 07:16 AM.
    My man, when you are fantasizing, don't go for attainable, you can get attainable at the local Applebee's. - Dave's Dreidel

  6. #6
    Atomic Punk Menlow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AndrewThomas.net View Post
    Creed is actually a musician and was in a semi-popular band years ago. The details are escaping me now, but I'm sure his bio info is out there.

    I miss The Office!

    He was in The Grass Roots.(Sooner or Later,Two Divided By Love).

  7. #7
    Top Of The World thebrownboys's Avatar
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    11.09.16 @ 12:27 PM
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    Somebody needs to add a section on singers!

  8. #8
    Sinner's Swing! Bullwinkle's Avatar
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    06.07.15 @ 10:30 AM
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    Quote Originally Posted by thebrownboys View Post
    Somebody needs to add a section on singers!
    I'll try. How about this?

    Pick your singer not by how well he can sing but by what he does on stage between songs.

    Amusing story:

    I once played an all day festival at a park. We were going on around four o'clock. At that time of day the crowd was full of families sitting on blankets. I forget the name of the band who was on before us, but I'll never forget the singer who screamed, "Let me see your hands!!" during the intro to the first song, and then introduced the next song by screaming "Are you guys ready to fuckin' rock tonight?"







    Don't read this.

  9. #9
    Sinner's Swing! the_atomic_punks_rule's Avatar
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    12.20.16 @ 03:09 PM
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    Default

    Creed is one of my favorite's on the office. I think most people have worked with a guy like that, one that flies under the radar and just does his time at the job, while having the potential to either steal your wallet or go postal at any moment.

  10. #10
    Sinner's Swing! Wickett's Avatar
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    http://creedbratton.com/
    The Grass Roots

    Live for Today


    Midnight Confession
    Last edited by Wickett; 02.04.08 at 02:26 PM.
    Don't drink the Jim Jones punch. They're called theToxic Twins for a reason...

  11. #11
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    I know it's supposed to be a joke, but I wonder how this cat would have felt about Paul McCartney or Geddy Lee as a bass player?

  12. #12
    Atomic Punk
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    05.31.14 @ 08:17 PM
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    Geddy Lee doesn't count, I don't know how well he did with the groupies back in the day but my guess is that they probably looked like him.

    Also, Lee and McCartney are both serious head-bobbers.
    "Nothing is ever what it seems but everything is exactly what it is." - B. Banzai


    My Blog:

    http://axxman300tool.blogspot.com/

    http://www.myspace.com/axxman300

 

 

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