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  1. #1
    Sinner's Swing!
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    Default The Latest Van Halen Newsletter

    Admittedly, I am speaking as an expert. I was a writer and publicist for over 20 years. But if any of my clients and/or bosses saw me sending out this newsletter it would get pulled and I'd probably lose my job. The amount of typos, wrong word usages, and just plain awful sentences makes me angry. Maybe, it's because I am better at this game than this. Maybe, it's because I am not working and she is. Maybe it's because I have more respect for the English language.

    In the Non-Music Forum there was a thread about people who shouldn't have their jobs. Allow me to add this to the list...I now present: the November 30th Van Halen Newsletter as it was received by me, just now. (There are some nifty pictures which, regrettably, did not reproduce here):


    VAN HALEN SCORES PEOPLEâ?TS CHOICE AWARDS NOMINATION
    The band's highly anticipated roadshow gets nominated for 34th Annual Peopleâ?Ts Choice Awards






    (Los Angeles, CA) November 30, 2007 - "Heard you missed us, we're back!"

    The immortal line from "Hot For Teacher" has never rung so true for VAN HALEN. The band saw its Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction earlier this year, and its landmark tour with original lead vocalist David Lee Roth is currently in full swing leaving trails of awestruck, sold-out crowds in its wake. Chalk up a recent People's Choice Awards nomination, and '07 has certainly been the year of VAN HALEN.

    For the 34th Annual People's Choice Awards, VAN HALEN has been grouped alongside The Police and Genesis in the Best Reunion Tour category. The public can log on to the People's Choice Awards Website (www.pcavote.com) and cast their votes. Fans have until December 5 to vote for VAN HALEN and the critically acclaimed tour The Hollywood Reporter calls "nothing short of spectacular." In addition to Roth, the latest incarnation of the legendary rock quartet features guitarist Eddie Van Halen, drummer Alex Van Halen and Eddie's 16-year-old son Wolfgang Van Halen on bass.

    The 34th Annual People's Choice Awards broadcasts at 9 p.m. EST January 8, 2008 on CBS. This year VAN HALEN helps make up a who's who list of nominees in music, television and film including Johnny Depp, Jessica Alba, Beyonce and Justin Timberlake. The winners will be announced during the program.

    The notoriety VAN HALEN'S tour continues to generate is tangible proof the band is more relevant than ever nearly 30 years after its debut album was released. And the band Rolling Stone magazine refers to as "rock gods" might just be delivering the goods with a People's Choice Award perched on an amplifier.

    For more VAN HALEN news and tour information, visit www.van-halen.com often.





    ON SALE DATES:
    Sat., Dec. 1 @ 10 a.m.
    San Antonio, TX
    Dallas, TX
    Houston, TX
    New Orleans, LA
    Charlottesville, VA
    Hershey, PA
    Atlantic City, NJ

    Sat., Dec. 1 @ Noon
    Omaha, NE

    Mon., Dec. 3 @ 10 a.m.
    East Rutherford, NJ
    New York, NY

    Tickets for all shows are available at:

    LiveNation
    http://www.livenation.com/artist/get.../artistId/3718
    Ticketmaster
    http://www.ticketmaster.com/artist/772490

    I LOVE ALL ACCESS VIP TICKET PACKAGES ON SALE DATES:

    On Sale Now
    Jan. 24 AT&T Center, San Antonio, TX
    Jan. 26 American Airlines Center, Dallas, TX
    Jan. 28 Toyota Center, Houston, TX
    Feb. 4 Qwest Event Center, Omaha, NE
    Feb. 8 New Orleans Arena, New Orleans, LA
    Feb. 22 John Paul Jones Arena, Charlottesville, VA
    Mar. 13 Izod Center, East Rutherford, NJ
    Mar. 17 Madison Square Garden, New York, NY
    Mar. 19 Giant Center, Hershey, PA
    Mar. 28 Boardwalk Hall, Atlantic City, NJ
    Mar. 30 Scottrade Center, St. Louis, MO

    Wed., Dec. 5
    Jan. 22 Ford Center, Oklahoma City, OK
    Feb. 12 BankAtlantic Center, Ft. Lauderdale, FL

    I Love All Access VIP Ticket Packages are available HERE. The Van Halen tour password is: vanhalen





    THIS WEEKâ?TS RADIO/TV STATION PROMOTIONS
    Tune in to the following stations for details on the VAN HALEN promotions happening in the San Antonio, Dallas, Houston, Omaha, New Orleans, Charlottesville, East Rutherford, Hershey, New York City, Atlantic City and surrounding areas this week. Don't forget to check your favorite radio station. Even if it's not on the list, they might be doing VAN HALEN giveaways, too!
    San Antonio, TX
    KZEP, KISS, KPUS, KTKR, KJXK, KLBJ, KENS-TV

    Dallas, TX
    KDBN, KLLI, KKTX, KEYJ, KTCK, KJKK

    Houston, TX
    KKRW, KIOC, KHPT, KHTC

    Omaha, NE
    KEZO, KQBW, KKCD, KTGL

    New Orleans, LA
    KRDJ, WTKX, WRKH, WHGO, WDGL, WKBU, WNOL-TV

    Charlottesville, VA
    WSUH, WZZI, WWLB, WINA, WACL, WAFX, WWWV, WRVA, WKLR

    East Rutherford, NJ
    WAXQ, WRAT, WDHA

    New York, NY
    WAXQ, WDHA, WBAB

    Hershey, PA
    WTPA, WQXA, WRVV, WRFY, WZZO, WYCR, WWYY, WODE, WFKB

    Atlantic City, NJ
    WMGK, WYSP, WMMR, WZXL, WMGM


    TOUR DATES

    Dec. 18 Honda Center, Anaheim, CA
    Dec. 20 Honda Center, Anaheim, CA
    Dec. 22 Oracle Arena, Oakland, CA
    Dec. 28 MGM Grand Garden Arena, Las Vegas, NV
    Dec. 30 MGM Grand Garden Arena, Las Vegas, NV
    Jan. 22 Ford Center, Oklahoma City, OK
    Jan. 24 AT&T Center, San Antonio, TX
    Jan. 26 American Airlines Center, Dallas, TX
    Jan. 28 Toyota Center, Houston, TX
    Feb. 1 Pepsi Center, Denver, CO
    Feb. 4 Qwest Event Center, Omaha, NE
    Feb. 8 New Orleans Arena, New Orleans, LA
    Feb. 12 BankAtlantic Center, Ft. Lauderdale, FL
    Feb. 14 Amway Arena, Orlando, FL
    Feb. 16 Jacksonville Veterans Memorial Arena, Jacksonville, FL
    Feb. 18 St. Pete Times Forum, Tampa, FL
    Feb. 22 John Paul Jones Arena, Charlottesville, VA
    Mar. 5 US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, OH
    Mar. 7 RBC Center, Raleigh, NC
    Mar. 9 1st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, MD
    Mar. 11 Verizon Wireless Arena, Manchester, NH
    Mar. 13 Izod Center, East Rutherford, NJ
    Mar. 17 Madison Square Garden, New York, NY
    Mar. 19 Giant Center, Hershey, PA
    Mar. 21 Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, PA
    Mar. 24 Dunkin Donuts Center, Providence, RI
    Mar. 26 Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, CT
    Mar. 28 Boardwalk Hall, Atlantic City, NJ
    Mar. 30 Scottrade Center, St. Louis, MO
    Apr. 1 Value City Arena, Columbus, OH
    Apr. 3 Allstate Arena, Chicago, IL
    Apr. 5 Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, MI
    Apr. 7 Bradley Center, Milwaukee, WI
    Last edited by Yesterdays; 11.30.07 at 07:46 PM.
    Mr. Horseradish courtesy of the International Horseradish Council and Brett.

  2. #2
    Atomic Punk TheresOnlyOneWay's Avatar
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    Donor

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Yesterdays View Post
    the band is more relevant than ever nearly 30 years after its debut album was released.
    Sure it is.
    Sammy did the impossible. He made Van Halen better. Deal with it.
    Michael did the impossible. He made Van Halen better. Deal with it.
    --------------------------
    IAMA I am a stage hand for big mainstream artists. (self.IAmA)

    Q: who was the biggest douche that you have worked with?

    A: Eddie Van Halen hands down he threatened all the stage hands that if we wernt all pushed to the side when he got off stage that he would "bash our faces in"

    Now the new David-Lee-Roth-Van Halen album, “Tokyo Dome In Concert,” is available for purchase, and it’s super, super, super, super, super, super, crazy bad. - Doug Elfman

  3. #3
    Atomic Punk chefcraig's Avatar
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    Huh?

    Yesterdays, I honestly believe that you are being somewhat dismissive and condescending in this instance. For one thing, did it escape your notice that somehow close to 88% of the information actually landed inside the computer?

    You see, that is precisely what is wrong about the media critics in this country...nobody ever wants to be bothered filming the planes that land safely...

    In all seriousness, this amateur hour dogshit reads like a first draft that was possibly "spell-checked". TWO of the paragraphs lead with the "People's Choice Awards" while the thrust should be on the client. And what is with the weird "in addition to Roth" genuinely strange band line up, finally mentioning Wolfgang in the last breathe?

    Poorly written and ill-conceived. FIRED? How on Earth would one have progressed far enough beyond mowing the lawn, let alone supply copy for a client in the first place?

    For those that follow the band, this is a kicker: "For more VAN HALEN news and tour information, visit www.van-halen.com often."

    Then again, consider the source, along with the absolutely astute and clear sighted brain trust behind it.
    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
    George Bernard Shaw

  4. #4
    Emperor of VHLinks.com Brett's Avatar
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    Default

    The newsletters pretty much suck, and the fact that whoever wrote it is putting in ridiculous hyperbole that VH is as relevant now as they've ever been is a fucking dolt. There's good PR and there's laughable BS. If it's Janie, my goodness.

    I think the fact that this site keeps having less and less reviews for every show, and far less than we had in 2004, shows that the band definitely isn't as relevant as they were, certainly not from its online base.

    I've been looking at the traffic of the other VH sites too, and none of them are impressive. Honestly we're not much busier than this time last year, if at all.
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  5. #5
    Good Enough Hack's Avatar
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    Premium Member

    Default ..

    Quote Originally Posted by TheresOnlyOneWay View Post
    Sure it is.
    theresonlyonewaytorock.

    Where the fuck have you been hiding?

    Guess you ain't diggin' VH with Dave kickin' ass.
    ...AND ON THE SEVENTH DAY, GOD CREATED VAN HALEN

    VAN HALEN IS A LIFESTYLE

  6. #6
    Top Of The World Wolfpack1's Avatar
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    Maybe, just maybe, VH is letting their stage performance talk for them. Is it 'too' much to realize they are letting the jaugernaut of their performance do the talking for them? Maybe, just maybe, VH is rocking and rolling along, that web sites, like this one, is slow with traffic because the fans are satisfied and don't need to express their satisfaction, BECAUSE the shows have kicked ass!? The 2004 was great, however, IMO, the show in 2007 has spoken for itself. We're all just satisfied!

  7. #7
    Top Of The World Wolfpack1's Avatar
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    Default

    Looking forward to Raleigh !

  8. #8
    Emperor of VHLinks.com Brett's Avatar
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Wolfpack1 View Post
    Maybe, just maybe, VH is letting their stage performance talk for them. Is it 'too' much to realize they are letting the jaugernaut of their performance do the talking for them? Maybe, just maybe, VH is rocking and rolling along, that web sites, like this one, is slow with traffic because the fans are satisfied and don't need to express their satisfaction, BECAUSE the shows have kicked ass!? The 2004 was great, however, IMO, the show in 2007 has spoken for itself. We're all just satisfied!
    No I don't think that's it at all actually.
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  9. #9
    Top Of The World Wolfpack1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brett View Post
    No I don't think that's it at all actually.
    why? why? why?

  10. #10
    Emperor of VHLinks.com Brett's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wolfpack1 View Post
    why? why? why?
    Because that doesn't make any sense. If people were really excited, they'd be sharing more. The reviews in 2004 were usually very positive (despite if the show really was), and we had TONS of reviews 3 years ago. It's not even close. I'm really shocked when I see how all of the VH sites have been less than busy.
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  11. #11
    Top Of The World Wolfpack1's Avatar
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    The fans are excited. From what i've heard they have played in front of nearly 750k fans already. A fan like me saw the first show, and read a plethora of reviews since then. They all say the same thing..."....VH kicked ass...." The average fan on any site has already witnessed this or is impatiently waithing this. Those who've already seen a show are ones who are taking in that moment of bliss and being silent. This site will get a ton of traffic after the turn of the calendar....

  12. #12
    Atomic Punk smithjc's Avatar
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    Donor

    Maybe the band just doesn't give a crap.

    But I must say, that porno/PR chick is doing one helluva job!
    RIP - Classic Van Halen

    "A lot of people take Van Halen more seriously than we do." The Diamond One



  13. #13
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    I only skimmed that newsletter when it came in--because I'm not interested in wasting my time on all the talk-talk hype-hype (as has been noted already in this thread).

    Good writing skills can go a long way in our culture. Half the fans out there could give a shit, yes; but when a rushed "official" newsletter--with numerous errors--shows up the way that one does, I get judgmental fast. It's part of the job description to be an expert writer for the one handling PR duties, and it reflects on the band (or business, whatever the case may be) when the job is done poorly.

    This is Van Halen's PR. Is anyone actually surprised?

  14. #14
    PM Goo with your concerns OLO's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AndrewThomas.net View Post
    This is Van Halen's PR. Is anyone actually surprised?
    Nope.
    ((Just My Two Cents))
    And thats about what its worth.

  15. #15
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    Aside from piss poor writing, there were three photos included in the email, at least in the one I received.

    One is of Ed. Another is of Al. And one is of Ed and Wolf.

    WHERE THE "F" IS DAVE???? Who would send out a "newsletter" about a band with photos included, and not have one of the frontman?

    Its very little things like this that make me wonder about the well being of this band right now. You always have to expect the other shoe to drop when it comes to VH. I remember in '04 the first hint we got that things weren't so peachy is that all the official pics posted online were of just Sam and Mike. Things like that seem small and stupid, but to me it says something.

    On a very basic human level, I think its just RUDE to not include a pic of Dave.

    On a professional level, its an awful mistake.

    Aside from Ed's playing during certain moments, I enjoyed the hell out of each show I attended so far on this tour. But I'm always ready for that shoe to come fallin'!

 

 

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