Follow us on...
Follow us on Twitter Follow us on Facebook Watch us on YouTube
Register
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 16
  1. #1
    Atomic Punk chefcraig's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.01.02
    Location
    A Confederacy of Dunces
    Posts
    19,370
    Last Online

    03.07.10 @ 06:18 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Drunk Imbecile Puts Snake In Mouth, Predictable Result Ensues

    Man bitten after putting snake in mouth

    PORTLAND, Ore. - Snake collector Matt Wilkinson of Portland grabbed a 20-inch rattler from the highway near Maupin, and three weeks later, to impress his ex-girlfriend, he stuck the serpent in his mouth.

    He was soon near death with a swollen tongue that blocked his throat. Trauma doctors at the Oregon Health and Science University saved his life.

    "You can assume alcohol was involved," he said. Actually, not just beer. It was something he called a "mixture of stupid stuff."

    Calls from cable network television stations poured in Tuesday, when he still had sore muscles and nerves from the venom.

    It happened at a barbecue with friends.

    Wilkinson, 23, had downed a six-pack and his ex-girlfriend asked him for a beer. He handed her one, not realizing the snake was also in his hand.

    "She said, 'Get that thing out of my face,'" Wilkinson said. "I told her it was a nice snake. 'Nothing can happen. Watch.'"

    So he stuck the snake in his mouth.

    "It got a hold of my tongue," he said.

    He was having breathing problems when his ex-girlfriend drove him to the hospital. "She was the only one sober," Wilkinson said.

    En route, they spotted a police car and asked for help.

    His next memory, he said, was waking up at the hospital.

    Doctors could not get a breathing tube down his throat.

    Dr. Richard Mullins cut a hole in Wilkinson's neck to insert the breathing tube. Physicians started giving antivenin, moved him to intensive care and kept him sedated until the swelling went down.

    The Poison Control Center sees about 50 people a year with snake bites, usually hikers. Deaths from rattlesnake bites in Oregon are extremely rare.

    Wilkinson, who works in construction, has yet to return to work. His three Western diamondback rattlers have been removed from his home.

    He says co-workers have been pretty blunt.

    "They were like, 'What the heck were you thinking?'" Wilkinson said.

    The answer? "It's my own stupidity."


    http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070919/...9ePvprw4UZ.3QA
    Last edited by chefcraig; 09.20.07 at 07:49 AM.
    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
    George Bernard Shaw

  2. #2
    Atomic Punk ZeoBandit's Avatar
    Join Date
    01.29.02
    Age
    41
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    17,830
    Favorite VH Album

    F.U.C.K.
    Favorite VH Song

    Humans Being
    Last Online

    12.14.17 @ 05:57 AM
    Likes
    54
    Liked 40 Times in 29 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    Saw that on cnn.com a couple days ago, but it was in a video, which I couldn't post here. (CNN.com video sucks by the way)

    What a dumbass.
    "What we are dealing with here, is a complete lack of respect for the law" - Jackie Gleason, Smokey and the Bandit

    www.geocaching.com - The site where you are the search engine.

  3. #3
    Sinner's Swing! Bullwinkle's Avatar
    Join Date
    03.08.07
    Location
    698 Sycamore Road, San Pueblo, CA
    Posts
    2,789
    Favorite VH Album

    Sound Magazine
    Favorite VH Song

    I Think I Love You
    Last Online

    06.07.15 @ 10:30 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 2 Times in 1 Post

    Default

    He says co-workers have been pretty blunt.

    "They were like, 'What the heck were you thinking?'" Wilkinson said.



    "Heck"?

    I would have been a little more 'blunt'.

  4. #4
    Atomic Punk chefcraig's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.01.02
    Location
    A Confederacy of Dunces
    Posts
    19,370
    Last Online

    03.07.10 @ 06:18 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Bullwinkle View Post
    "Heck"?

    I would have been a little more 'blunt'.
    His tongue is still swollen, making it hard to pronounce words beginning with "F".
    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
    George Bernard Shaw

  5. #5
    Atomic Punk chefcraig's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.01.02
    Location
    A Confederacy of Dunces
    Posts
    19,370
    Last Online

    03.07.10 @ 06:18 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ZeoHalen View Post
    Saw that on cnn.com a couple days ago, but it was in a video, which I couldn't post here. (CNN.com video sucks by the way)

    What a dumbass.
    Thanks for the heads-up...from youtube:

    Interview With Above Mentioned Dumbass (2:11)
    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
    George Bernard Shaw

  6. #6
    Good Enough vhrocker's Avatar
    Join Date
    01.18.06
    Age
    46
    Location
    "Mean Street", Oklahoma
    Posts
    2,197
    Favorite VH Album

    The one I'm listenin' to.
    Favorite VH Song

    Can't pick just one
    Last Online

    01.21.15 @ 08:57 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 15 Times in 15 Posts

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by chefcraig View Post
    It was something he called a "mixture of stupid stuff."
    ALEX IS GOD!!!

    I've been doin' this for 'bout 20 years now, and I'll tell ya, to this day I still don't know the right drumstick from the left drumstick -Alex Van Halen


  7. #7
    Good Enough Thai Boxer 9901's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.08.03
    Age
    29
    Location
    Nampa, Idaho U.S.A
    Posts
    2,638
    Favorite VH Album

    5150, OU812, Balance, F.U.C.K
    Favorite VH Song

    Dont have one
    Last Online

    08.28.16 @ 11:47 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 18 Times in 11 Posts

    Default

    my mom had told me about this the other day and i was instantly grossed out because of the sole fact that i hate snakes with a passion. but how dumb and drunk do you have to be to put a FUCKING POISONOUS SNAKE in your mouth and expect it to not hurt you.

    God dammit! where has common sence gone in this world????
    Facebook http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=504401115
    YouTube http://www.youtube.com/user/jedimasterkyle

    BOISE STATE BRONCOS! - They're awesome. Deal with it!

    11/16/04 - VAN HALEN in Boise, Idaho. Changed my life forever

    8/8/06 - Sammy Hagar and the Wabos w/Michael Anthony in Boise, Idaho. Sam and Mike still kick ass

  8. #8
    Unchained scs5150's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.08.04
    Age
    49
    Location
    Sausalito, Ca
    Posts
    529
    Favorite VH Album

    All
    Favorite VH Song

    Unchained
    Last Online

    12.17.10 @ 10:56 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    Another episode of FDA


    Fucking Dumb Ass!

  9. #9
    Baluchitherium sisca's Avatar
    Join Date
    03.26.04
    Age
    47
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    5,186
    Favorite VH Album

    F.U.C.K.
    Favorite VH Song

    judgement day/ me wise magic
    Last Online

    06.12.16 @ 07:51 PM
    Likes
    1
    Liked 15 Times in 11 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    natural selection, culling the herd. people that stupid should be made to face the consequence sans medical attention. the human race would be better off.
    """"\//-/""""


    The Marines I have seen around the world have the cleanest bodies, the filthiest minds, the highest morale, and the lowest morals of any group of animals I have ever seen. Thank God for the United States Marine Corps!


    www.myspace.com/mikesisca

    "If ladies want Valentines Day so bad either make Superbowl Sunday an actual holiday or give guys Steak and Blowjob Day and we'll call it even." T.RYAN, sharing thoughts on valentine's day.

    " SHUT UP, FAGGOT." - Vinnie Velvet, showing off that sharp wit of his.

    DIRTY SANCHEZ- It's not just for breakfast anymore!



    “ Originally posted by FORD
    History tells us that oppressive nations build walls to keep people IN, not out.
    (See "Berlin Wall" and "Likud Israel" for examples) ” FORD- when i told him i'd build a wall between the US and Mexico.

    then ill build it from the mexican side. -my reply.

  10. #10
    Damage your reputation seenbad's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.24.00
    Age
    45
    Location
    Portland Oregon
    Posts
    26,946
    Favorite VH Album

    Halen 1
    Favorite VH Song

    I'm the one
    Last Online

    11.30.17 @ 06:15 PM
    Likes
    73
    Liked 257 Times in 92 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    Wow.

    Side note, I've played golf with Dr. Mullins there. He's an ass.
    sheepa latta peepah dabba looka foh a moopy

    Gunter glieben glauchen globen

  11. #11
    Good Enough vcooper3's Avatar
    Join Date
    05.30.02
    Age
    40
    Location
    VA
    Posts
    2,227
    Last Online

    12.14.17 @ 02:47 PM
    Likes
    835
    Liked 1,940 Times in 785 Posts


    Premium Member

    Default

    "Liquid courage" does the trick. Ideas always seem to be so much better when you're drunk. I think he figured out that rattlesnakes aren't good pets.

  12. #12
    Good Enough vcooper3's Avatar
    Join Date
    05.30.02
    Age
    40
    Location
    VA
    Posts
    2,227
    Last Online

    12.14.17 @ 02:47 PM
    Likes
    835
    Liked 1,940 Times in 785 Posts


    Premium Member

    Default

    Check out this video on break. This seems just about as brilliant as the snake man.

    http://www.break.com/index/asian-gir...-scorpion.html

  13. #13
    Atomic Punk smithjc's Avatar
    Join Date
    04.12.00
    Location
    The US of A
    Posts
    16,463
    Favorite VH Album

    Women & Children First
    Favorite VH Song

    Fools/All things Halenized
    Last Online

    08.04.17 @ 11:33 PM
    Likes
    130
    Liked 29 Times in 14 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    Just when you think people can't get any stupider...............

    Gotta wonder what kinda crap he was on tho. A bunch of stupid stuff??
    RIP - Classic Van Halen

    "A lot of people take Van Halen more seriously than we do." The Diamond One



  14. #14
    Sinner's Swing!
    Join Date
    11.21.03
    Posts
    3,080
    Last Online

    07.01.10 @ 06:21 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    The Darwin Awards have a category for near-misses. I'll bet this will be listed in due time.
    http://darwinawards.com/darwin/

  15. #15
    Imperial Fascist Overlord Down In Flames's Avatar
    Join Date
    05.28.00
    Location
    Your Mother's Bedroom
    Posts
    14,285
    Favorite VH Album

    VH II
    Favorite VH Song

    D.O.A.
    Last Online

    @
    Likes
    0
    Liked 3 Times in 3 Posts

    Quote Originally Posted by chefcraig View Post
    to impress his ex-girlfriend, he stuck the serpent in his mouth.
    Let this be a lesson to you confused young men out there!

    The way to impress your girlfriend is by putting your serpent in her mouth.

    ("Dr. DIF, Sex Therapist" 2:00 AM, Tuesdays on NBC.)
    http://www.vhlinks.com/vbforums/images/avatars/michael3.jpg

    "You are the McCarthy of this board. The witch burner." - strungout, on yours truly

    "Only Eddymon would claim victory during a FOUR game losing streak." - OLO

    "Did I not say, 'I think we should shoot him!' I did. Double rainbow on this end. I require a high five. Out."- track 5, on the delicate art of banning

    "If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire..."

 

 

Similar Threads

  1. Ed puts unneccesary pressure on himself
    By extreme red roth in forum Main VH Discussion
    Replies: 19
    Last Post: 05.23.05, 09:02 PM
  2. Why can't all rap "music" result in this??
    By rrussou812 in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 03.25.05, 07:24 AM
  3. Replies: 11
    Last Post: 03.23.05, 11:26 AM
  4. Michael Jackson puts hex on Speilberg...
    By SactoFan in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 03.12.03, 08:26 AM
  5. Maybe this puts the whole Dave thing in perspective
    By Rikk in forum Main VH Discussion
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 01.29.02, 01:32 AM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •