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  1. #1
    Eruption 5150's Avatar
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    12.02.17 @ 12:58 PM
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    Default BBQ Mishaps, anyone?

    Well. This is what happens when you leave me alone. I might have accidentally added a lil too much lighter fluid to the coals while they were simmering. (The grill would not stay up to tempature - I dont think I had enough coals on there) All the sudden, a fireball erupted from the grill and cinged 3/4 of my forearm hair, 1/4 of my left leg hair, part of the goatee, and a small patch on the top of my head. Good thing I hadn't been drinking or I coulda been injured! (Let the flaming begin)
    Anyone else lose some hair or have some BBQ horror stories?
    "I didn't just drive a thousand goddamn miles on a motorcycle to watch some little girl prance around on stage" - Steve Morrison on if Justin Bieber performed at Sturgis Motorcycle Rally

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  2. #2
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
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    07.30.17 @ 08:59 PM
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    NOW THAT's A FIRE!!!!! THAT's A FIRE!!!!!

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  3. #3
    Eruption Lightning Fingers's Avatar
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    Is this what you looked like?

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  4. #4
    Master Bluesman Elwood P.'s Avatar
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    12.12.17 @ 09:36 AM
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    That's just the one of the perfectly acceptable risks you run while BBQ'ing. Never liked those charcoal starters myself. Isn't really a real BBQ unless you go the fluid/flamethrower routine.
    "I'm the opposite of Bill Cosby. Diamond Dave always gets your approval." (DLR)

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  5. #5
    Hot sauce on everything Red's Avatar
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    12.06.17 @ 06:36 AM
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    For those who decide to use a gas grill, it has been my experience that lifting the lid prior to lighting is a damn good idea.

  6. #6
    Atomic Punk jimmy812's Avatar
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    06.03.17 @ 06:59 PM
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    Default

    Fiftyone, I hope you're alright. Take it easy, bro.
    Well, my little story doesn't even compare to that, but:

    I've never been injured or anything like that (knock on wood) from BBQ'ing, but last week I was cooking up some nice marinated chicken and right in the middle of cooking I ran out of propane. My reserve tank was empty as well. So I march back in the house and tell my wife the news. She kind of laughs and says I'll just throw them in the oven. I said "ok, but I don't think you understand. I feel like half the man I was 15 minutes ago." I knew I was getting close to the end of the tank, but I thought it would last just one more time. I felt like Kramer when he wanted to see how far he could drive when the fuel needle was on 'E'mpty. Do you know the feeling of eating a half-grilled, half oven-cooked chicken? Ugh, it's devastating. I took a bite and said to my wife, "all I taste is failure." At least she was able to laugh at it.

    I know it's not much of a story, but I take pride in cooking on the grill. The next day I filled both tanks and I felt like I could conquer the world!!
    2-time Fantasy Baseball Champion.

  7. #7
    Atomic Punk chefcraig's Avatar
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    03.07.10 @ 06:18 AM
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    Thanksgiving is plainly an unlucky time for myself and my family. We've lost two family members on or near the date, and it has been the source of more misbegotten mishaps than I'd care to remember regarding the preparation of the dinner.

    One nut-busting classic occurred in a public park in Miami over a decade ago. My friend and co-worker Kevin invited me to his annual "turkey day wing-ding", an assembly of family and friends to celebrate the day through beer, food and football. The prep starts early in the week, gathering all the shit needed to put on a successful party away from home.

    This year would feature a first: a "deep fried" turkey, complete with a rather large (and expensive) fryer.

    (I'm certain that most of you already see where this is going. )

    Several electrical cords were laid out (Kevin and I both worked construction, so at the time we access to several hundred foot cords) and aligned with the outlets provided by the park. These were needed for the various tv's, radios and assorted appliances in use, not to mention the fryer.

    Well...the beer (and other things) started to get imbibed, and some of the guests started getting...[I]"well baisted"[I]. Particularly the one dim-fuck who decided it was neccessary to run between two tables marked with signs DO NOT Approach, where the electrical lines intersected along with the extremely short cord connected to the turkey fryer.

    You guessed it: His feet became tangled in the cords. That and the inertia from his spirited running were enough to YANK the cords, dislodging various connections and unfortunately TIPPING OVER THE TURKEY FRYER, ALONG WITH THE TURKEY AND SEVERAL GALLONS OF VERY HOT COOKING OIL.

    The grandmother who was quikly doused with this concoction of futility spent the evening in the burn ward of a local hospital. Needless to say, the party abruptly ended.

    Out of respect for her sacrifice to this most dim-bulbed way of celebrating the holiday, the event has been sadly cancelled ever since. Ah yes, the joy of entertaining for the holidays.
    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
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  8. #8
    Sinner's Swing!
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    My brother-in-law (dumb as a bag of rocks), was at my house starting up the grill. He was already on his 6th beer, thus even dumber than usual. He was contiuously squirting the flames with lighter fluid while telling us some story about the drama in his life when the flame crept up the stream of lighter fluid and blew the bottle up. Thankfully, the bottle was plastic and 1/2 empty. We were far enough away from him to not get any flames on us but my brother-in-law's pants and jacket were on fire and he just stood there and, in true Beavis & Butthead manner, said "cool"! He patted the flames out and wasn't badly burned but I do recall NOT running to help put the fire out.

  9. #9
    Romeo Delight lil_redrocker5150's Avatar
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    12.02.12 @ 12:09 PM
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    Quote Originally Posted by looper_guy View Post
    My brother-in-law (dumb as a bag of rocks), was at my house starting up the grill. He was already on his 6th beer, thus even dumber than usual. He was contiuously squirting the flames with lighter fluid while telling us some story about the drama in his life when the flame crept up the stream of lighter fluid and blew the bottle up. Thankfully, the bottle was plastic and 1/2 empty. We were far enough away from him to not get any flames on us but my brother-in-law's pants and jacket were on fire and he just stood there and, in true Beavis & Butthead manner, said "cool"! He patted the flames out and wasn't badly burned but I do recall NOT running to help put the fire out.
    LMFAO!!!!! thats the funniest damned thing i've heard in a long time! i laughed so hard it brought tears to my eyes!!!
    waiting for inspiration to take place here....

  10. #10
    Eruption 5150's Avatar
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    12.02.17 @ 12:58 PM
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lightning Fingers View Post
    Is this what you looked like?
    Close. More like...


    Im kidding, of course.
    I have a sense of humor about it now. Nothing more came out of it than cinged hair, a fight with the will-be wife and some half-assed cooked chicken. Live and learn, eh? By the way, cinged hair has got to be one of the most disgusting things i've smelled - and took almost a week to get rid of.
    "I didn't just drive a thousand goddamn miles on a motorcycle to watch some little girl prance around on stage" - Steve Morrison on if Justin Bieber performed at Sturgis Motorcycle Rally

    -"I'd rather stick my junk into a freshly-slapped hornet's nest." LLFHS on banging Lindsay Lohan

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  11. #11
    Hang 'Em High jetguy5150's Avatar
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    12.12.17 @ 11:16 AM
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    Ok....so while there was no personal injury, I did learn a lesson about the type of chicken to buy. I had a LOT of people coming over for my son's 3rd birthday so I decided to cheap out a bit and go with chicken thighs. I knew they were fattier and thus greasier than breasts but MAN!!! One second nothing, the next second flames are licking out of every opening in the BBQ. Luckily everyone at the party was nice enough to take photos but not help with the fire. And of course everyone was talking about how bad the chicken would be. Turned out to be the best chicken any of us had ever had.




    PS: I'm wet because I was trying out the kid's slip and slide. Obviously I should have spent less time making an ass out of myself and more time watching the BBQ.
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  12. #12
    Baluchitherium hatchetforce's Avatar
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    11.27.15 @ 03:34 PM
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    Quote Originally Posted by jetguy5150 View Post
    PS: I'm wet because I was trying out the kid's slip and slide. Obviously I should have spent less time making an ass out of myself and more time watching the BBQ.
    LOL @ the postscript my friend

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  13. #13
    Damage your reputation seenbad's Avatar
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    11.30.17 @ 06:15 PM
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    It was the best chicken you had ever had because like with steak, it pays to sear it first to keep the moisture retained..... a little less napalm next time though there sparky.
    sheepa latta peepah dabba looka foh a moopy

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  14. #14
    Super Duper Frontman track 5's Avatar
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    12.03.17 @ 09:00 PM
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    Quote Originally Posted by seenbad View Post
    It was the best chicken you had ever had because like with steak, it pays to sear it first to keep the moisture retained.
    Now once again we'll debate this method of cooking a steak. If we haven't, then we will now. My pops is from your school. I'm, however, from the school of the slow medium heat mesquite wood grill. It takes a tad longer, but it can't be beat. I am the master at it. I've got other buddies that burn that shit at burly fucking temps to start, then back off with the direct heat. Fuck that. Slow and easy...smoke it up just right. The smoke rings on my steaks are killer. I think I saw a porno named that. LOL. Out.
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  15. #15
    Atomic Punk chefcraig's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by track 5 View Post
    ...The smoke rings on my steaks are killer. I think I saw a porno named that. LOL. Out.
    Do me a favor my friend: Step away from the grill, and at least, go rinse your hands with the hose..

    Unless one is watching a porn vid regarding BBQ after everyone has left one's party, the two simply do not work together.
    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
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