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Thread: Bond vs. Bauer

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    Outta Space Cowboy Scotty's Avatar
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    Default Bond vs. Bauer

    A friend posed this intriguing question today.

    If Jack Bauer and James Bond were forced to battle it out to the death, who would be left standing?

    After much consideration, I decided on Bond as the victor, if only because Jack is more emotional and Bond more calculated. But it's close.

    Debate.

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    Atomic Punk MF5150's Avatar
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    Bond...... Period... End Debate
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    Baluchitherium hatchetforce's Avatar
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    Jack wins everytime accept against Connery Bond, because old age and treachery always overcome youth and inexperience.

    . . . . .
    "The eagle lands at midnight: bacon burger ice cube over" ~ jetguy5150

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    Quote Originally Posted by hatchetforce View Post
    Jack wins everytime accept against Connery Bond, because old age and treachery always overcome youth and inexperience.
    Too true. The Moore, Lazenby and Dalton Bonds would lose for feyness, where as the Brosnan version would merely bore poor Bauer unconscious.
    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
    George Bernard Shaw

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    I don't know if it's fair to separate the Bonds by actor. Bauer/Bond should be compared character-to-character, not Jack vs. Connery/Lazenby/Dalton/Moore/Brosnan/Craig. LOL!

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    Atomic Punk chefcraig's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by scotty5150 View Post
    I don't know if it's fair to separate the Bonds by actor. Bauer/Bond should be compared character-to-character, not Jack vs. Connery/Lazenby/Dalton/Moore/Brosnan/Craig. LOL!
    That's another thread, too: Who is the superior "Casino Royale" Bond, Sellers/Niven or Craig?
    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
    George Bernard Shaw

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    Outta Space Cowboy Scotty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chefcraig View Post
    That's another thread, too: Who is the superior "Casino Royale" Bond, Sellers/Niven or Craig?

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    Bond would win. He has Q on his side.
    "What we are dealing with here, is a complete lack of respect for the law" - Jackie Gleason, Smokey and the Bandit

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    Baluchitherium KT's Avatar
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    I'm gonna be the odd-man out here and go with my man, Jack!

    Top 60 Facts on Jack Bauer

    If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".
    If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.
    Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
    If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life.
    Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
    When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack Bauer found it and put it back.
    Jack Bauers calender goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.
    Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.
    1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
    When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer fucking hates lemonade.
    If it tastes like chicken, looks like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Jack Bauer says its beef. Then it's fucking beef.
    Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
    Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.
    Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.
    Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
    Osama bin Laden's recent proposal for truce is a direct result of him finding out that Jack Bauer is, in fact, still alive.
    Jack Bauer is the leading cause of death in Middle Eastern men.
    Jack Bauer once won a game of rock paper scissors using niether rock, paper nor scissors.
    Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.
    Every mathematical inequality officially ends with "< Jack Bauer".
    Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.
    Jack Bauer removed the "Escape" button from his keyboard. Jack Bauer never needs to escape.
    If Rosa Parks was in Jack Bauer's seat, she'd move to the back of the bus.
    Simon Says should be renamed to Jack Bauer Says because if Jack Bauer says something then you better fucking do it.
    Jack Bauer once double teamed a girl.. by himself.
    Jack Bauer's favorite color is severe terror alert red. His second favorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.
    When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer for help.
    Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days time. Wait, that is a real fact.
    When you open a can of whoop-ass, Jack Bauer jumps out.
    When Jack Bauer was a child, he made his mother finish his vegetables.
    Jack Bauer arm once wrestled Superman. The stipulations were the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside of his pants.
    Your attraction to Jack Bauer in no way affects your sexual orientation.
    It is a known fact that when Time magazine awards "The Man of Year*", there is fine print on the bottom of the cover that says, " *besides Jack Bauer."
    Superman's only weakness is Kryptonite. Jack Bauer laughs at Superman for having a weakness.
    In 96 hours, Jack Bauer has killed 93 people and saved the world 4 times. What the fuck have you done with your life?
    Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.
    Meet me in Cabo!

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    "What we are dealing with here, is a complete lack of respect for the law" - Jackie Gleason, Smokey and the Bandit

    www.geocaching.com - The site where you are the search engine.

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    Great find, kt.

    I'm one of the few who never really enjoyed the Bond movies. Just not my thing, I guess.

    Bauer gets my vote.

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    Damage your reputation seenbad's Avatar
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    Impossible. The dual would cause an implosion to a black hole where space/time continuem warps and the only visible sign of the struggle would be interpreted through and x-ray out the back side in another demension.

    Don't even go there dude. It's just not safe.
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    Quote Originally Posted by seenbad View Post
    Impossible. The dual would cause an implosion to a black hole where space/time continuem warps and the only visible sign of the struggle would be interpreted through and x-ray out the back side in another demension.

    Don't even go there dude. It's just not safe.
    I am forced to agree with this statement

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    Bauer gets my vote, Bond may be more calculated, but he never cut someone's head off with a hacksaw, or barged into a room and kneecapped someone. Bauer is just plain brutal when he has to be, Bond has always had a sense of decorum about him, and I think if it came down to it, Bauer would win hands down. Of course we would be running the risk of all life as we know instantly stopping and every molecule in our bodys simotaneuosly exploding because of the force of the fight that would be taking place, it would be like "crossing the streams"(Ghostbusters)...just a bad idea.
    Van Halen....nothing else is needed....

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    Neither.

    Bond would buy Bauer a drink. Then exchange phone numbers "Just in case".
    "Nothing is ever what it seems but everything is exactly what it is." - B. Banzai


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