Follow us on...
Follow us on Twitter Follow us on Facebook Watch us on YouTube
Register
Results 1 to 7 of 7
  1. #1
    Baluchitherium hatchetforce's Avatar
    Join Date
    01.03.02
    Age
    52
    Location
    Marblehead, Mass.
    Posts
    5,288
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Hear About It Later
    Last Online

    11.27.15 @ 03:34 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 65 Times in 42 Posts


    Donor

    Default Hatchetforce Myst’ry

    Hatchetforce Myst’ry



    Thought I’d share a little morning laugh…



    So I’m taking a break from writing my opus “Verticality among the Pews” and going out for a smoke. I’ve recently switched to my U.S. Embassy Caracas, Venezuela Slimline Zippo. I’m giving my primary lighter, 1962 lotus and sword SVN, a break because it’s getting a little too old for daily use (much like its owner). My wife’s cats Attila and Plato are going through their morning routine (observing me, sleeping, and perennially looking for the sunbeam). I don my primary denim smoking jacket, withdraw the Camels, but find no lighter. I upend my backup barn coat. I check the usual spots (floor, coach crevices, under the globe) to no avail. I check the secondary locations (on top of the mailbox, coffee table, and the spot where it’s supposed to go) and no dice. Disenchanted, I grab a pack of matches and head for the eastern smoking location (the sun hits it first in the morning).



    By now, my wife has joined the cats and is watching me with mirthful disdain. The three of them look like that curious dog in the old RCA phonograph ads. As I’m holding the pack, I think, hmm, there should be nine smokes in here. This feels like a full pack. I open the hardpack and sure enough the Slimline has slipped into it. My wife smiles, the cats go back into the sunbeam, and she says, “Mystery solved Miss Marple, would you like some morning play, I’m off today”. I reply “as soon as I finish my smoke”.


    . . . . .
    "The eagle lands at midnight: bacon burger ice cube over" ~ jetguy5150

  2. #2
    Sinner's Swing! racefan8's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.27.05
    Age
    35
    Location
    To Hell and back ~ 26.2 miles
    Posts
    3,515
    Favorite VH Album

    Van Halen
    Favorite VH Song

    Mean Street
    Last Online

    04.01.11 @ 07:59 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    Love it
    Stupid is forever, ignorance can be fixed.
    False words are not only evil in themselves, but they infect the soul with evil.
    Compassion is the basis of all morality.
    The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget.
    www.myspace.com/getracefan8

  3. #3
    Sinner's Swing! InTheBeginning's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.12.04
    Age
    51
    Location
    In a van down by the river
    Posts
    3,182
    Favorite VH Album

    Van Halen/5150
    Favorite VH Song

    RWTD/BoBW
    Last Online

    07.20.17 @ 05:17 PM
    Likes
    27
    Liked 76 Times in 30 Posts

    Default

    Good to hear from you!
    A little more volume in the headphones please.

  4. #4
    Hang 'Em High jetguy5150's Avatar
    Join Date
    04.19.04
    Location
    Burlington, On, Canada, Earth
    Posts
    6,142
    Favorite VH Album

    F.U.C.K. 1984
    Favorite VH Song

    Feels So Good (deal with it...
    Last Online

    12.08.17 @ 12:46 PM
    Likes
    581
    Liked 426 Times in 228 Posts


    Premium Member

    Donor

    Default

    Mr. Hatchetforce...always a pleasure reading your dissertations. You painted a vivid picture of the morning events!
    Signature not currently available. You aren't missing much.

  5. #5
    Hang 'Em High perticelli's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.07.03
    Age
    52
    Posts
    6,658
    Favorite VH Album

    fair warning, women & children
    Favorite VH Song

    unchained,take your whiskey
    Last Online

    11.30.15 @ 02:22 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 14 Times in 8 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    So, your lighter got you laid?
    Kudos
    Eddie is the greatest, period

    The Unofficial VHLinks RRHOF

    SkyyeFM-Radio without the Rules(Webpage)

  6. #6
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
    Join Date
    03.08.04
    Location
    Secret Witness Protection Location
    Posts
    31,731
    Favorite VH Album

    Anything Mike played on
    Favorite VH Song

    Anything Mike played on
    Last Online

    07.30.17 @ 08:59 PM
    Likes
    34
    Liked 60 Times in 35 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    Hatchet, man you don't post nearly enough for my taste.
    LowLifeFlatHeadScum

    [sigpic][/sigpic]


    Your Hacked Nude Photo Here!

  7. #7
    Baluchitherium hatchetforce's Avatar
    Join Date
    01.03.02
    Age
    52
    Location
    Marblehead, Mass.
    Posts
    5,288
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Hear About It Later
    Last Online

    11.27.15 @ 03:34 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 65 Times in 42 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    Thanks man, rumors of my exaggeration are greatly demised

    . . . . .
    "The eagle lands at midnight: bacon burger ice cube over" ~ jetguy5150

 

 

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •