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  1. #1
    PM Goo with your concerns OLO's Avatar
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    12.17.17 @ 10:54 AM
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    Default Those of you that served in the Military, tell us your stories.

    To those of you that served in the Military tell us your stories. Basic Training sounds like fun and games. I have had a few guys work for me that served in the Navy, I never get tired of hearing the stories from them.
    ((Just My Two Cents))
    And thats about what its worth.

  2. #2
    PM Goo with your concerns OLO's Avatar
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    I honestly thought about joining the Navy after High School, it was a toss up between School and joining. I phoned a Navy recruitment office and had a appointment all set up. My step father served in the Navy for 4 years during the 50's, he thought it was a great idea. I arrived at the appointment with a very open mind, I knew what I wanted to do in the Navy and that I would qualify for that schooling. The recruiter was such a idiot, he was the most unprofessional dork I had ever come across. He kept talking to me in a Pepe la Pue accent, I was embarrassed for him. At one point I caught the Marine recruiter chuckling and shaking his head. I bet that fool chased off more possible recruits than he did sign them.

    I often wonder what my life would be like had I joined the Navy.
    ((Just My Two Cents))
    And thats about what its worth.

  3. #3
    Baluchitherium sisca's Avatar
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    06.12.16 @ 07:51 PM
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    during the LA riots in 92, i was in the Marine Corps stationed at Camp Pendleton, Ca, just north of San Diego. our unit, MP company, was put on alert to go up to LA and get ready to pull riot duty. after a day spent at MCAS El Toro, we drove into long beach to deploy, and took residence in a local shopping mall's parking garage. our first night out, i was on post with another buddy, guarding a KFC(!) and a drugstore from being looted. my buddy, who was watching the drugstore, was across the street when we saw a bronco pull up to the red light at the intersection. as soon as i saw someone in the passenger side moving around, i started looking for some kind of cover. NOTHING BUT A TELEPHONE POLE. the bronco came through the intersection, A FUCKING UZI comes through the window and the guy just laughed. now, he could have sawed me in half, but he didnt, and i didnt engage him because his driver was hauling ass. we radioed in to our command post, who alerted the long beach PD, and caught them several blocks later. upon search, that bronco contained AK-47's and Uzi's, and enough ammo to take out a small 3rd world nation. which brings me to the next night. same scenario, only I had the the drugstore covered and my buddy took the KFC. relatively quiet night, until a white van came out of nowhere, jumped the curb, and the side door slid open. no sooner did that door slide open i had my rifle locked and loaded and sighted in on the guys who came out. my buddy joined me, and in a profanity laden, very loud manner we instructed them to get their asses up against the van arms, up, legs apart. " but we're FEDS," said one of the guys. "Bullshit, motherfucker!" i replied, and we told these guys we want to see ID and to slowly reach for it and hold up behind them. and holy shit, they WERE feds. FBI feds. 4 of em. "who's your comannding officer?" asked one of the agents. i said, "Major R.S. Street, military police company, 1st Marine division. um, are we in trouble?" the agents all laughed and said "actually no. you guys are doing a damn good job out here and we wanted to tell him so." i explained to the agents why i was so high strung out there from the night before, and they all understood. " dont blame ya. im just glad you didnt shoot!"
    """"\//-/""""


    The Marines I have seen around the world have the cleanest bodies, the filthiest minds, the highest morale, and the lowest morals of any group of animals I have ever seen. Thank God for the United States Marine Corps!


    www.myspace.com/mikesisca

    "If ladies want Valentines Day so bad either make Superbowl Sunday an actual holiday or give guys Steak and Blowjob Day and we'll call it even." T.RYAN, sharing thoughts on valentine's day.

    " SHUT UP, FAGGOT." - Vinnie Velvet, showing off that sharp wit of his.

    DIRTY SANCHEZ- It's not just for breakfast anymore!



    Originally posted by FORD
    History tells us that oppressive nations build walls to keep people IN, not out.
    (See "Berlin Wall" and "Likud Israel" for examples) FORD- when i told him i'd build a wall between the US and Mexico.

    then ill build it from the mexican side. -my reply.

  4. #4
    Baluchitherium sisca's Avatar
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    06.12.16 @ 07:51 PM
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    Default but wait! there's more!

    so, me and a few buddies used to go down to pacific beach and go clubbing. one of the clubs, moose mcgillicuddy's, was always full of great looking women, and the night usually ended with all of us hooking up. one night, however, my friend billy met this girl, and left the club with her, saying he was going back to base to get it on. me and the other guys stayed behind, partied all night and got back to base around 4 am. later that morning, i hear a banging on my door. its billy, pleading for me to let him into my room. i have a screaming fucking hangover, so it takes me a few minutes to pry myself out of my rack and open the door. the look on billys face was priceless. eyes wide, face pale, jaw hitting the floor. "dude, " he said, "you gotta get rid of that chick for me. i cant go back to my room." "why not?" i asked. "whats going on?" "well, you know i picked her up and we came back here, i noticed she was talking funny, and i just figured she was drunk." i said "yeah,so?" billy tells me in a quivering voice, "man, she's still talking like that! she wasn't drunk last night! she's retarded!" and yes, he hit it. we ended up giving the girl a ride back to san diego and all was good. but he never lived it down, thats for sure.
    """"\//-/""""


    The Marines I have seen around the world have the cleanest bodies, the filthiest minds, the highest morale, and the lowest morals of any group of animals I have ever seen. Thank God for the United States Marine Corps!


    www.myspace.com/mikesisca

    "If ladies want Valentines Day so bad either make Superbowl Sunday an actual holiday or give guys Steak and Blowjob Day and we'll call it even." T.RYAN, sharing thoughts on valentine's day.

    " SHUT UP, FAGGOT." - Vinnie Velvet, showing off that sharp wit of his.

    DIRTY SANCHEZ- It's not just for breakfast anymore!



    Originally posted by FORD
    History tells us that oppressive nations build walls to keep people IN, not out.
    (See "Berlin Wall" and "Likud Israel" for examples) FORD- when i told him i'd build a wall between the US and Mexico.

    then ill build it from the mexican side. -my reply.

  5. #5
    Atomic Punk WinterlessIceness's Avatar
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    Lol sisca, that made me wanna join the military

  6. #6
    Atomic Punk ZeoBandit's Avatar
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    12.14.17 @ 05:57 AM
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    LOL Sisca!!!!
    "What we are dealing with here, is a complete lack of respect for the law" - Jackie Gleason, Smokey and the Bandit

    www.geocaching.com - The site where you are the search engine.

  7. #7
    Atomic Punk ziggysmalls's Avatar
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    12.17.17 @ 05:21 AM
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    I probably will make a few posts here because I defintely have some stories about my millitary experience. I lived a pretty decadent lifestyle from 93-97 while serving overseas in the Navy.

    Work related
    Boot camp was a blast. After a few weeks you figure out what to do and its pretty easy. At least for me it was. Anyway we had this one guy name Klingefeld or something like this. Could not make his rack. There is this seam that goes on the sheet that is called the "Catchedge". Needs to be up on your sheets so when you fold it back over, its down. Pretty easy Right? Not for this guy. Anyway after making our racks for about two hours we have an inspection. This guy has his "Catchedge" the wrong way. Our Company Commander asks him what the fuck happened and why his catchedge was wrong. He said that it was right when he did it and he does not know why it was flipped. Our CC said it must have been a ghost that flipped it....the Catchedge Ghost. He then takes the sheet off and puts it over the recruits head. Tells him to go outside and in every open window in the barracks compounds (held like 10 companies) he needed to say "Booo I'm the Catchedge ghost". So this 6'4'' recruit goes outside and started doing this all around the building. Funniest thing I have seen.

    Non Work Related -
    I used to have what you can say, sex parties with some local Scottish women. I knew a couple of middle aged women who if you could not get lucky with the younger girls would be around for after bar parties. We would invite some other girls over to a flat and start drinking and playing truth and dare. Don't ask me why but that always got things going. Anyway one night we were over this Nora's house. Her kid had a friend sleeping over so we were told to be quiet. Its 3 girls and 3 guys. Anyway eventually people are in various states of undress. I am naked though and hungry. I decided to make sandwiches however there is only bread and tomatos. So I make about 6 or so tomato sandwiches and put them on a platter. As I started to go back in the room with the rest of the people, a door opens and its Nora's 8 year old daughter. I am naked with a platter of tomatos with a half hard on. She goes "Mom??????" in a nervous voice. Nora comes storming in and tells her to go back in her room. Anyway later on we eat and I am making out with this other women Chris. Both of us are naked on the floor but not having sex. My friend Derrick is making out with this girl on the couch and feels the couch shaking. He turns around and sees our friend Keith masterbating while holding a condom in his hand. He looks at Derrick and says "When he (me) sticks it in, I'm cornholing her" Anyway people go off in their respective rooms and Chris and I start going at it. Eventually we end up in doggy when the door opens. Its that Nora's kid again and she goes "Chris?????"" since Chris was her babysitter sometimes. Anyway Chris turns her head around and says "Get Out!!!" in this weird Demonic Scottish brouge. The kid ran away and that was the last time I ever saw her. Eventually I left but I always wondered how that kid is screwed up in life because she seen me naked twice in one night.

  8. #8
    Baluchitherium sisca's Avatar
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    during boot camp, one of the Drill Instructors from a different platoon would round up all the native american recruits and take them outside to do raindances on the parade deck.
    """"\//-/""""


    The Marines I have seen around the world have the cleanest bodies, the filthiest minds, the highest morale, and the lowest morals of any group of animals I have ever seen. Thank God for the United States Marine Corps!


    www.myspace.com/mikesisca

    "If ladies want Valentines Day so bad either make Superbowl Sunday an actual holiday or give guys Steak and Blowjob Day and we'll call it even." T.RYAN, sharing thoughts on valentine's day.

    " SHUT UP, FAGGOT." - Vinnie Velvet, showing off that sharp wit of his.

    DIRTY SANCHEZ- It's not just for breakfast anymore!



    Originally posted by FORD
    History tells us that oppressive nations build walls to keep people IN, not out.
    (See "Berlin Wall" and "Likud Israel" for examples) FORD- when i told him i'd build a wall between the US and Mexico.

    then ill build it from the mexican side. -my reply.

  9. #9
    Atomic Punk ziggysmalls's Avatar
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    God I miss the unpolitically correct armed forces.

    In my first day of boot camp we were doing roll call for the first time. CC goes Francis. Two guys answer "here sir". One was black and one was white. Our CC goes..."this is not going to work" pointed at the white guy and said "Salt" Pointed at the black guy and said "pepper".

    For the next 10 weeks they were Salt and Pepper.

  10. #10
    Eruption
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    04.28.16 @ 08:41 PM
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    Default

    [QUOTE=ziggysmalls]I probably will make a few posts here because I defintely have some stories about my millitary experience. I lived a pretty decadent lifestyle from 93-97 while serving overseas in the Navy.

    Work related
    Boot camp was a blast. After a few weeks you figure out what to do and its pretty easy. At least for me it was. Anyway we had this one guy name Klingefeld or something like this. Could not make his rack. There is this seam that goes on the sheet that is called the "Catchedge". Needs to be up on your sheets so when you fold it back over, its down. Pretty easy Right? Not for this guy. Anyway after making our racks for about two hours we have an inspection. This guy has his "Catchedge" the wrong way. Our Company Commander asks him what the fuck happened and why his catchedge was wrong. He said that it was right when he did it and he does not know why it was flipped. Our CC said it must have been a ghost that flipped it....the Catchedge Ghost. He then takes the sheet off and puts it over the recruits head. Tells him to go outside and in every open window in the barracks compounds (held like 10 companies) he needed to say "Booo I'm the Catchedge ghost". So this 6'4'' recruit goes outside and started doing this all around the building. Funniest thing I have seen.
    QUOTE]


    I did U.S. Coast Guard boot camp last year around this time and once that first half of basic is over all the bullshit goes out the window and its really quite hilarious. I got a story similiar to your ghost story. This guy I can't remember his name for the hell of me but he had a bad habit of looking in the Company Commanders compartments(office for you civilian types)and one night finally got caught so PO McKenzie rounds up the company and we follow this guy around every building(4 barracks buildings with about 20 rooms per building)and the CC has this guy jump in front of every open door and say Peek-a-boo. Hilarious watching this huge 220 pound 6'5 black guy jump infront of doors yelling peek-a-boo. We were laughing our asses off and surprisingly didn't get beat for it.

    Now the most hilarious thing that happened in Basic in my opinion sort of involved me. We were getting our mail one evening and my sister had gotten creative and wrote "Dan Dan he's our man if he can't do it no one can" on the outside and well one of my CC's saw it and was giving me shit for it and said "yeah your gonna be doing that cheer out on my quarterdeck last night of training" So I'm minding my own business and this guy Spear walks up and just starts doing a cheerleader looking type jig infront of me chanting "dan dan he's our man" unbeknownst to him because his back was to the door PO Garcia had returned to the room and was watching him dance. She walks up behind him and just calmly says "I can get you a tutu since you like dancing so much" she took him out on the quarterdeck and made him dance for 2 hours like a ballerina and of course followed by sending us outside to push the dirt for awhile for laughing.

  11. #11
    Good Enough Phatie's Avatar
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    I wanted to join at 19, but my Dad, the Marine talked me out of it, instead to work for him for a decade - which was basically the same deal anyway, I just didn't get the retirement.

    To all of you who've ever had the shit severely kicked out of you by your Marine fathers, this bud's for you!

  12. #12
    Atomic Punk ziggysmalls's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by VanHalen2079
    I did U.S. Coast Guard boot camp last year around this time and once that first half of basic is over all the bullshit goes out the window and its really quite hilarious. I got a story similiar to your ghost story. This guy I can't remember his name for the hell of me but he had a bad habit of looking in the Company Commanders compartments(office for you civilian types)and one night finally got caught so PO McKenzie rounds up the company and we follow this guy around every building(4 barracks buildings with about 20 rooms per building)and the CC has this guy jump in front of every open door and say Peek-a-boo. Hilarious watching this huge 220 pound 6'5 black guy jump infront of doors yelling peek-a-boo. We were laughing our asses off and surprisingly didn't get beat for it.

    Now the most hilarious thing that happened in Basic in my opinion sort of involved me. We were getting our mail one evening and my sister had gotten creative and wrote "Dan Dan he's our man if he can't do it no one can" on the outside and well one of my CC's saw it and was giving me shit for it and said "yeah your gonna be doing that cheer out on my quarterdeck last night of training" So I'm minding my own business and this guy Spear walks up and just starts doing a cheerleader looking type jig infront of me chanting "dan dan he's our man" unbeknownst to him because his back was to the door PO Garcia had returned to the room and was watching him dance. She walks up behind him and just calmly says "I can get you a tutu since you like dancing so much" she took him out on the quarterdeck and made him dance for 2 hours like a ballerina and of course followed by sending us outside to push the dirt for awhile for laughing.
    Haha that is funny.

    Here is another one that happened at Boot camp. We had this CC (company commander) in our department who was the meanest toughest black women you could ever meet. We called her the Black Widow. She made the male CC's nervous. Anyway one of our guys screwed up but our CC's told them his punishment would come later. About three days later they come in early and tell him to get on the sidewalk outside leading to the Quarterdeck (basically the entrence to the building in civilan speak). They told him to get on all fours and bark at any woman they see. Well they knew what time the Black Widow was coming in and they were setting him up. When she walked up, he started barking. She cycled (pushups, situps, jog in place, bodybuilders) him for about an hour or so. He was throwing up all over himself.

    Priceless.

  13. #13
    Good Enough Nickdfresh's Avatar
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    I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you (or you'd die of boredom anyways.)

    Seriously, I'll post a story when I have a little more time.... (And no, I could never make this up.)
    Last edited by Nickdfresh; 04.26.06 at 07:47 AM.
    Originally posted by Katydid

    Because I realize you all (the Roth Army) are a bunch of twisted, demented, beastility, porn loving, drug addicts and alcoholics and psycopaths. I guess Devil worshippers more aptly describe you.

  14. #14
    Atomic Punk ziggysmalls's Avatar
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    Want to know the difference between a fairy tale and a sea tale?

    A fairy tale starts off "Once upon a time..." and a sea tale starts off with "this is a no shitter...."

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    Damage your reputation seenbad's Avatar
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    12.15.17 @ 10:48 AM
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    Quote Originally Posted by sisca
    so, me and a few buddies used to go down to pacific beach and go clubbing. one of the clubs, moose mcgillicuddy's, was always full of great looking women,
    I remember Moose Mac! Were you in Honolulu?? Anyways, that's where I sucked down a few beers and watched O.J. drive down the freeway. Later on it turned in to a pub crawl. Good times.
    sheepa latta peepah dabba looka foh a moopy

    Gunter glieben glauchen globen

 

 

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