Follow us on...
Follow us on Twitter Follow us on Facebook Watch us on YouTube
Register
Results 1 to 7 of 7
  1. #1
    Sinner's Swing! Buckeye's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.09.04
    Age
    47
    Location
    Columbus, Ohio
    Posts
    2,875
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning/5150
    Favorite VH Song

    Mean Street/Summer Nights
    Last Online

    10.30.17 @ 01:16 PM
    Likes
    301
    Liked 91 Times in 38 Posts

    Default George Carlin: Life Is Worth Losing

    Recent HBO special. Man, he looks old. And his comedy has gettoen rather cynical. He is still a comedic genious though as evidenced by his opening sequence below, all memorized I might add:

    Iím a modern man Ė a man for the millennium, digital and smoke-free. A diversified multi-cultural post-modern deconstructionist; politically, anatomically and ecologically incorrect. Iíve been uplinked and downloaded, Iíve been inputed and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing and I know the downside of upgrading. I live the lowlife. A cutting-edge state of the art bicoastal multitasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond. Iím new wave but Iím old school, and my inner child is outward bound. Iím a hot-wired heat-seeking warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and biodegradable. I interface on my database, my database is in cyberspace. Iím interactive, hyperactive and from time to time Iím radioactive.

    Behind the 8-ball, ahead of the curve, riding a wave, dodging a bullet, pushing the envelope. Iím on point, on task, on message and off drugs. I got no need for coke and speed, no urge to binge and purge. Iím in the moment, on the edge, over the top but under the radar. A high-concept low profile medium-range ballistic missionary. A street-wise smart bomb, a top gun bottom feeder; I wear power ties, I tell power lies, I take power naps, I run victory laps. Iím a totally ongoing big foot, slam dunk rainmaker with a proactive outreach. A raging workaholic, a working rageaholic! Out of rehab, and in denial.

    I got a personal trainer, personal shopper, personal assistant and a personal agenda. You canít shut me up, you canít dumb me down. ĎCause Iím tireless and Iím wireless. Iím an alpha male on beta blockers. Iím a nonbeliever and an overachiever Ė laid back but fashion forward. An up-front, down home, low rent but high maintenance. Super-sized, long-lasting, high definition, fast acting, oven ready and built to last. Iím a hands-on, footloose, kneejerk headcase. Premature post-traumatic and I have a love child who sends me hate mail. But Iím feeling, Iím caring, Iím healing, Iím sharing. A supportive bonding nurturing primary caregiver. My output is down, but my income is up. I take a short position on the long bond, and my revenue stream has its own cash flow. I read junk mail, I eat junk food, I buy junk bonds, I watch trash sports. Iím gender-specific capital intensive user-friendly and lactose intolerant.

    I like rough sex, I like tough love. I use the F word in my email and the software in my hard drive is hard-core Ė no soft porn. I bought a microwave at a mini-mall, I bought a minivan at a megastore. I eat fast food in the slow lane. Iím toll-free, bite-sized, ready to wear and I come in all sizes. A fully equipped, factory authorized, hospital tested, clinically approved and scientifically formulated medical miracle. Iíve been pre-washed, pre-cooked, pre-heated, pre-screened, pre-approved, pre-packaged post-dated freeze dried double-wrapped, vacuum packed, and I have an unlimited broadband capacity.

    Iím a rude dude but Iím the real deal. Lean and mean, cocked, locked and ready to rock. Rough, tough and hard to bluff. I take it slow, I go with the flow. I ride with the tide, I got glide in my stride. Driving and moving, sailing and spinning, jiving and grooving, wailing and winning. I donít snooze, so I donít lose; I keep the pedal to the metal and the rubber on the road. I party hardy and lunchtime is crunchtime. Iím hanging in, there ainít no doubt, and Iím hanging tough, over and out!
    Brilliant!
    Last edited by Buckeye; 02.24.06 at 04:27 AM.

  2. #2
    Atomic Punk jimmy812's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.03.04
    Age
    46
    Location
    Connecticut
    Posts
    7,640
    Last Online

    06.03.17 @ 06:59 PM
    Likes
    1,188
    Liked 327 Times in 204 Posts

    Default

    Not to burst your bubble on Carlin, but I thought this special was sub-par for him. Ya gotta respect him for his career, though. He was the first comic I really liked. But watching that special, all I thought was this guy is just a really crotchety old grumpy man (which I'll probably be like someday).
    You're right, I think he was very cynical. Almost too cynical for comedy. He should probably get a job at FoxNews.

  3. #3
    Hang 'Em High perticelli's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.07.03
    Age
    52
    Posts
    6,658
    Favorite VH Album

    fair warning, women & children
    Favorite VH Song

    unchained,take your whiskey
    Last Online

    11.30.15 @ 02:22 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 14 Times in 8 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    I saw him do this live in vegas. i am a big fan of Carlin. not as funny as his older days, but thought provoking nonetheless. And i agree, the opening sequence, all from memory, was very impressive.
    Eddie is the greatest, period

    The Unofficial VHLinks RRHOF

    SkyyeFM-Radio without the Rules(Webpage)

  4. #4
    Don't Touch the Dog There axebrian's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.04.03
    Posts
    2,442
    Last Online

    01.28.17 @ 02:56 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 8 Times in 6 Posts


    Premium Member

    Donor

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by perticelli
    I saw him do this live in vegas. i am a big fan of Carlin. not as funny as his older days, but thought provoking nonetheless. And i agree, the opening sequence, all from memory, was very impressive.
    I also seen Carlin recently in Vegas opening with that long-winded bit. Gees...I don't know any 68 year old man that can spit that out from memory. Awesome ability to memorize at his age.
    ####......###,
    #............#.....#
    ###........#......#
    #............#.....#
    ####......###'

    February 10, 1978...The day that changed the Rock N Roll guitar world!!!

  5. #5
    Baluchitherium mistere's Avatar
    Join Date
    05.31.02
    Location
    Bangkok
    Posts
    5,364
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Women Down
    Favorite VH Song

    Chicken Feet for Breakfast
    Last Online

    07.11.09 @ 03:27 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default

    I have to agree. Carlin is the ONLY comedian whose books and records I
    have ever actually bought and more power to him for his uncanny ability
    to call bullshit and his cerebral faculties. But I had the same take on this
    in that he's now just coming off as bitter. Justifiably so, perhaps, but sorta
    hard to watch.

  6. #6
    Atomic Punk smithjc's Avatar
    Join Date
    04.12.00
    Location
    The US of A
    Posts
    16,463
    Favorite VH Album

    Women & Children First
    Favorite VH Song

    Fools/All things Halenized
    Last Online

    08.04.17 @ 11:33 PM
    Likes
    130
    Liked 29 Times in 14 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    I love George Carlin. His mind is like a steel trap isn't it.
    RIP - Classic Van Halen

    "A lot of people take Van Halen more seriously than we do." The Diamond One



  7. #7
    Hang 'Em High janthraxx's Avatar
    Join Date
    05.12.03
    Age
    32
    Location
    Emerald Triangle
    Posts
    6,614
    Favorite VH Album

    CVH minus DD, FUCK, Balance
    Favorite VH Song

    Humans Being, 5150
    Last Online

    11.18.14 @ 07:57 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default

    I saw him do this show in Long Beach, it was stellar He came off as no more bitter than usual, which is to say, extremely fucking bitter
    "Suck a fat one, faggot."
    -MikeL, showing off that sharp wit of his.

    "You may recognize some of these chemicals. Let's start with cyanide...The one the Aum Shinrikyo cult attempted to use to commit mass murder in a Tokyo subway in May 1995...The same cyanide produced routinely--1.4 million tons per year--for use in the production of plastics, adhesives, cosmetics, pharmaceuticals, and so on. It seems that those who put small amounts of cyanide in subways are terrorists. But those who produce it in mass quantities and contaminate broad reaches of soil, water, and air, killing countless living beings, are not terrorists, but rather capitalists, and are counted among the finest and most powerful people on the planet."

    -Derrick Jensen, "What We Leave Behind"

    "You know what's weird to me is Christians who are against the death penalty. After all, if it weren't for the death penalty, we wouldn't celebrate Easter!"

    -the late, great, Bill Hicks

 

 

Similar Threads

  1. video: Real Life vs Internet Life
    By voivod in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 01.11.06, 05:51 PM
  2. Losing weight
    By extreme red roth in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 48
    Last Post: 04.24.05, 05:45 PM
  3. Am I losing it?
    By Thai Boxer 9901 in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Music Only)
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 04.17.05, 06:49 AM
  4. vh losing to bon jovi in new poll:(
    By JMJ in forum Main VH Discussion
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 09.02.01, 08:16 PM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •