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  1. #1
    Baluchitherium Mikey Metalhead's Avatar
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    06.12.15 @ 11:43 AM
    Liked 5 Times in 4 Posts


    Default the end of christmas

    A Christmas Story

    'Twas the night before Christmas--Old Santa was pissed.
    He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
    Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks. I have a good mind to scrap the whole works!

    I've busted my ass for damn near a year,
    Instead of "Thanks Santa"--what do I hear?
    The old lady bitches cause I work late at night.
    The elves want more money--The reindeer all fight.

    Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids.
    Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.
    And just when I thought that things would get better
    Those assholes from the IRS sent me a letter,
    They say I owe taxes--if that ain't damn funny
    Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?

    And the kids these days--they all are the pits
    They want the impossible--Those mean little shits
    I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
    Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads
    I made a ton of yo yo's--No request for them,
    They want computers and robots...they think - I'm IBM!

    Flying through the air...dodging the trees
    Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
    I'm quitting this job there's just no enjoyment
    I'll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment.

    There's no Christmas this year now you know the reason,
    I found me a blonde. I'm going SOUTH for the season
    I SURVIVED TEXAS LINKERS WEEKEND I, II, III, IV and VI and VII.barely made it to VIII time to slow down
    I musta had a broken middle finger for V

  2. #2
    Little Dreamer Pumpkin Escobar's Avatar
    Join Date
    SFV California
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Romeo Delight
    Last Online

    11.29.05 @ 03:55 PM
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    If your nose is running and your feet are smelling, you're probably upside down....

  3. #3
    Atomic Punk sixstring's Avatar
    Join Date
    Favorite VH Album

    1984 / 5150
    Favorite VH Song

    the ones with ed on them.
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    07.23.14 @ 01:02 PM
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts



    LOL! THAT'S the SPRIT!

    Bah Humbug, bitches...

    "20 minutes (late to work)? Shit. Last year I woke up three weeks too late.
    My advice is to go for the alien abduction story. Look bemused, dishevelled and on the verge of tears as you recount your story of intrusive and degrading medical tests.
    Worked for me anyway. I still have colleagues asking me what it is like to fuck a green womanoid with seventeen breasts.
    Alternatively just walk in and inform everyone that alcoholism is indeed a disease and that they should be less judgemental and perhaps a little more supportive."
    - graeme on the addiction to this place.

    "something tells me that after the nuclear holocaust, there'll be twinkies, cockroaches, and a dave vs. sammy argument going on somewhere".
    - han valen, 6.11.04

    "in my best "saw" scary movie voice: "oh, yes, there will be beagles."
    - hatchetforce, 6.7.06



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