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  1. #1
    Good Enough THE MARD's Avatar
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    Oh! You ate one, too?
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    Can't Stop Loving You
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    01.28.16 @ 02:05 AM
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    While dining in one of the finer Adult Entertainment Establishments, Diamond David Lee Roth, an icon of 80's rock, ponders his latest solo efforts. Very little is said about his video's, and what is said isn't very flattering. Unable to get a record deal, he decides to swallow his pride once more. "Hell. It's what everybody wants..." he says to himself.

    Pulling up to a secluded residence, he walks over to the gates of Edward Van Halen, guitarist legend, household. He takes a deep breath, and pushes the intercom button. A groggy, graspy voice answers "Yeah"? "Ed? It's me. It's...Dave." A long pause. Ed respose "what do want, Dave? It's 2:00 in the morning?". "I've been thinking, Ed. Don't you think it's time we settled this once and for all? We need each other. Whaddya say we give it one more try?" Ed pauses..."Dave...I'm just not into it right now...We're not kids anymore...this ain't the 70's...You just can't show up like we used to...The old days are over."
    The intercom goes dead.

    Visably upset, Dave jumps into his car and starts driving. He drives all night. He doesn't know where. He doesn't care.

    Finally, after dawn, he decides he has gone on far enough. He's tired. Hungry. "might as well get something to eat...where the hell am I?" He pulls over into the closest parking lot, gets out of his car, streches, looks around. "What the fuck...?" he says. "Am I in Mexico?" He stares at the white tower with a ball on top and reads the familar logo 'Cabo Wabo Cantina'. "Shit!" He starts rushing back to his car. "I gotta get the fuck outta here..." "Can this day get any worse?" Just then, as if on cue, he hears the sound of an engine and tires against the pavement. He turns and sees a red Farrari pulling up. Out from behind the wheel the totally impossible happens. "Dave?" it is Sammy Hagar.

    For the very first time, the two frontmen from Van Halen, two men who have taken several verbal jabs at each other, who have more in common than neither they, nor their fans ever care to admit, meet...


    (continue)

    [ March 07, 2002 at 07:47 AM: Message edited by: THE MARD ]</p>
    "Keep honking buddy. I'm reloading..." -The Mard

    "......HEY!.............alright............." -BIG FOOT

    " I know what you're thinking: "Do I want to watch Mard? We know that horses were very strong and could actually stop airplanes from flying away. The ones made out of stone called "statues" -- occasionally came to life and rode off is a colonial cliche. How many more times do we need to hear about how the oppressive Raj's wore villainous black capes, crafted cunning plastic masks to impersonate people, and drained all the blood from their slaves so they could keep the fluid in bottles in their dungeons? I mean, YAWN!

    But if you're willing to sit through this dry sort of historical drama one more time -- or even just this dry historical review -- you will not be disappointed. In fact, some of you might just learn something they didn't teach you in school!-
    MARD-The Movie

  2. #2
    carpe damn diem billy007's Avatar
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    09.25.16 @ 06:23 PM
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    Premium Member
    You should continue this...

  3. #3
    Atomic Punk FORD's Avatar
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    04.22.16 @ 10:07 AM
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    Nah, that's not the way it happenned at all....

    (Cue Lance Watts and/or Garth Jones to post their "Dave Meets Sammy" cartoon)
    Eat Us And Smile

    Welcome back, Van HALEN!!!!

    ...It's the BAND and Dave is really the cat that can front VH. He sang his ASS off and was really cool. No cheese here guys, this is filet Mignon! - Steve Lukather's comment after witnessing a Van HALEN 2007 rehearsal

    "What then is this bleating of sheep in my ears?"- 1 Samuel 15:14

    Howard Dean for President 2012. YEEEAAARRRGGGHHH!

  4. #4
    carpe damn diem billy007's Avatar
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    09.25.16 @ 06:23 PM
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    Premium Member
    Originally posted by FORD:
    Nah, that's not the way it happenned at all....
    Well, I do have to question the fact that Sammy didn't hit or run over anything when he pulled into the parking lot...

  5. #5
    Beloved Glenn's Avatar
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    02.13.15 @ 07:56 AM
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    Donor

    The two men eye each other suspiciously. A sort of dance begins, the potential combatants circling each other, perhaps looking to bury old hatchets; perhaps looking to bury old rivals!

    Facial creases are exaggerated as their individual minds run at high gear.

    "Is Dave so broke", Sammy wonders to himself, "that he's here to rob my bar at this early hour?"

    "Is Sammy pregnant?" Dave wonders.

    Finally, after what seems like hours, but in actuality is only mere seconds, words are exchanged between the two men.

    "Either your hairline has gone north or your eyebrows have gone WAY south man!", Sammy chuckles.

    "Dude, I'd punch ya in the mouth, but I'd hate to get cake all over my hand!", Dave responds.

    Dave turns to head back to his car, and Sammy makes his first move towards the front door of his club. But a new maturity comes over both, and they feel forced to express a final thought to each other. It's a monumental moment that few thought would ever come to pass, but they sum it up as only grown men can;

    "But fuck, at least you don't look like Cherone!!!", they say in unison.


    (continue)

  6. #6
    Hot For Teacher
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    05.03.05 @ 08:18 PM
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    Originally posted by Glenn:
    "Is Sammy pregnant?" Dave wonders.

    lol - that line is classic!!!

  7. #7
    Atomic Punk FORD's Avatar
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    04.22.16 @ 10:07 AM
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    Originally posted by TrapZZ:
    </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Glenn:
    "Is Sammy pregnant?" Dave wonders.

    lol - that line is classic!!!</font>[/QUOTE]Yeah, but it begs the question... Who's the father?
    Eat Us And Smile

    Welcome back, Van HALEN!!!!

    ...It's the BAND and Dave is really the cat that can front VH. He sang his ASS off and was really cool. No cheese here guys, this is filet Mignon! - Steve Lukather's comment after witnessing a Van HALEN 2007 rehearsal

    "What then is this bleating of sheep in my ears?"- 1 Samuel 15:14

    Howard Dean for President 2012. YEEEAAARRRGGGHHH!

  8. #8
    Hot For Teacher
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    05.03.05 @ 08:18 PM
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    Originally posted by FORD:
    </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by TrapZZ:
    </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Glenn:
    "Is Sammy pregnant?" Dave wonders.

    lol - that line is classic!!!</font>[/QUOTE]Yeah, but it begs the question... Who's the father? </font>[/QUOTE]i have my suspicions after seeing the new "In the Navy" video....


 

 

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