Follow us on...
Follow us on Twitter Follow us on Facebook Watch us on YouTube
Register
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 37
  1. #1
    Good Enough VivaVH's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.09.04
    Location
    Cambridge, OH
    Posts
    1,954
    Favorite VH Album

    Dave - WACF, Sam - FUCK
    Favorite VH Song

    Romeo Delight, Dream is Over
    Last Online

    04.02.15 @ 09:23 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 4 Times in 1 Post


    Donor

    Default Hulk Hogan's Rules for Dating

    From FHM magazine:

    ďI run a tight ship here, and if you want to date my daughter, Brooke, you must obey the Hulk Hogan Demandments. Theyíre not commandments - theyíre demandments. Obey them, and you might pass the test.

    First off, you have to be clean-cut. If youíre a jabroni-you know, tattoos, piercings, purple hair and all that crap-itís not happening. Not in this lifetime.

    You must be respectful. When you come over to my house, I donít expect a present, but I do expect you to call me Mr. Hogan and that you bring your best behavior, values, and manners. If you come over, and for some reason Iím not around, stay out of my office and my gym. I donít want my stuff messed with.

    Before you take my daughter anywhere, you need to spend some quality time at our house with the family so we can get to know you. Thatís also when Iíll be checking to make sure your pupils arenít dilated and that your eyes arenít jitterbugging all over the place-drugs and alcohol are a definite no-no.

    I prefer that youíre not a wrestler. If youíre meek and mild, I can put the fear of God into you more easily.

    You have to be modest. If thereís one thing I canít stand, itís cockiness! We had that Aaron Carter kid come by once wanting to date my daughter. He lasted about an hour in my house before I kicked him out. Brooke somehow talked me into inviting him over, and once he was here, he started putting his feet up on the furniture and going into the refrigerator without asking. Finally, I told him to hit the highway.

    If I do finally allow you to take Brooke out, I demand that sheís returned home on time and that she call to check in every half-hour. I have GPS installed in her car, so I know where youíre going. I can also remotely shut her car engine down if I think something funny is going on.

    Keep your hands to yourself-and thatís not even a demandment, thatís standard procedure if you want to live.

    Iíve also taught Brooke how to defend herself. Sheís been boxing for three years now and can throw one hell of a right cross. Iíve taught her some submission holds if somebody puts their hand in the wrong place and basic self-defense stuff like the heel stomp, the crotch shot and the thumb-in-the-eye technique. But no one has been stupid enough to disrespect Brooke like that. It would be trouble if they did: Iím not afraid of a good lawsuit.Ē
    If it's BROWN, flush it DOWN.

    GO STEELERS!

  2. #2
    Good Enough rrussou812's Avatar
    Join Date
    01.27.00
    Age
    41
    Location
    Denton TX
    Posts
    2,147
    Favorite VH Album

    FUCK
    Favorite VH Song

    Top Of the World
    Last Online

    04.23.17 @ 12:14 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default



    "Touched my daughter's ass??? OOOOhhh the Hulkster and all his little Hulkamanics are gonna run wild on YOU brutha."


  3. #3
    Eruption valdez44's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.25.02
    Location
    Alhambra, CA
    Posts
    1,193
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning, and 5150
    Favorite VH Song

    Outta love again, Humans Being
    Last Online

    12.14.12 @ 08:13 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    I've got 2 daughters....so some day I will be applying similar rules.
    If you shake my hand better count your fingers - Mustaine

  4. #4
    Atomic Punk Viking's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.21.03
    Age
    52
    Location
    Mound Valley, Kansas
    Posts
    9,045
    Favorite VH Album

    5150, Fair Warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Dance The Night Away, Dreams
    Last Online

    12.14.17 @ 03:26 PM
    Likes
    39
    Liked 34 Times in 10 Posts

    Default

    It sounds like he got those rules from my Dad.
    "Viking - last to sleep, first to rise, last to leave, that's how the Nords of old rocked the house." ~ timmac in the 'Texas Linkers' thread talking about yours truly. :-)

  5. #5
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
    Join Date
    03.08.04
    Location
    Secret Witness Protection Location
    Posts
    31,731
    Favorite VH Album

    Anything Mike played on
    Favorite VH Song

    Anything Mike played on
    Last Online

    07.30.17 @ 08:59 PM
    Likes
    34
    Liked 60 Times in 35 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    There's something very very cool about the idea of a backstreet boy being sent running by this human skyscraper.
    LowLifeFlatHeadScum

    [sigpic][/sigpic]


    Your Hacked Nude Photo Here!

  6. #6
    Unchained TenaciousD21's Avatar
    Join Date
    01.23.03
    Age
    30
    Location
    California
    Posts
    495
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Me Wise Magic, Beautiful Girls
    Last Online

    01.11.12 @ 10:12 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by LowLifeFlatHeadScum
    There's something very very cool about the idea of a backstreet boy being sent running by this human skyscraper.
    actually aaron carter is the younger bro of nick carter who is in the backstreet boys.... how do i knowthis? um.... i guranteed my source confidentiality
    "And I used to wonder why, then later i realized, cuz he's Eddie Fuckin Van Halen!"
    -Michael Ian Black on VH1's I Love the 80s as to why Eddie Van Halen is always smiling.

  7. #7
    Baluchitherium Leo Van Newhouse's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.02.03
    Age
    33
    Location
    Wham Bam Amsterdam, The Netherlands
    Posts
    5,169
    Favorite VH Album

    Van Halen
    Favorite VH Song

    Atomic Punk
    Last Online

    08.14.13 @ 03:25 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by TenaciousD21
    actually aaron carter is the younger bro of nick carter who is in the backstreet boys.... how do i knowthis? um.... i guranteed my source confidentiality
    You just got to her place when he went out the window???
    THE PEOPLE HERE TONIGHT : Representing DAVID LEE ROTH in all his glory!!!!!!!!!

    JH: "How was your New Years Eve show at the House Of Blues?"
    DLR: "James...I AM New Years Eve!"

    "To keep up with me, you must be fast. To sing like me, you must be great. To beat me? You must be kidding?" David Lee Roth

    "I'm gonna want to rock out w/ my cock out instead of playing anal taper dork." Colonel Sanders


    ANOTHER HOSTILE TAKEOVER COMING YOUR WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  8. #8
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
    Join Date
    03.08.04
    Location
    Secret Witness Protection Location
    Posts
    31,731
    Favorite VH Album

    Anything Mike played on
    Favorite VH Song

    Anything Mike played on
    Last Online

    07.30.17 @ 08:59 PM
    Likes
    34
    Liked 60 Times in 35 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by TenaciousD21
    actually aaron carter is the younger bro of nick carter who is in the backstreet boys.... how do i knowthis? um.... i guranteed my source confidentiality

    Wow, I was actually unsure of whether or not to admit I knew the name of a backdoor boy, then you come along with that little nugget of info and totally redeem me.

    Thanks TD21!!!
    LowLifeFlatHeadScum

    [sigpic][/sigpic]


    Your Hacked Nude Photo Here!

  9. #9
    Super Duper Frontman YankeeRose's Avatar
    Join Date
    10.13.99
    Location
    I am a Van Halenized Canadian!
    Posts
    12,837
    Favorite VH Album

    OU812
    Favorite VH Song

    Why Can't This Be Love
    Last Online

    12.11.17 @ 05:55 PM
    Likes
    97
    Liked 197 Times in 123 Posts

    Funny article, I was curious to see what Brooke looked like. I found these pictures of her. She is 5'10" I read.










    This is what the Hogan family looks like...
    Last edited by YankeeRose; 07.03.05 at 03:48 PM.
    Right Now you're reading my post!


    I can't stand rap....people who can't sing do rap....you can sing rebellion as well as talk it....Hitler would have been in a rap band...

    -- John Entwistle

    2006 VHL Fantasy Hockey Champ!

  10. #10
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
    Join Date
    03.08.04
    Location
    Secret Witness Protection Location
    Posts
    31,731
    Favorite VH Album

    Anything Mike played on
    Favorite VH Song

    Anything Mike played on
    Last Online

    07.30.17 @ 08:59 PM
    Likes
    34
    Liked 60 Times in 35 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    Damn.....it's the master race!

    LowLifeFlatHeadScum

    [sigpic][/sigpic]


    Your Hacked Nude Photo Here!

  11. #11
    Atomic Punk
    Join Date
    01.29.02
    Age
    49
    Location
    somewhere over the rainbow
    Posts
    22,946
    Last Online

    12.18.17 @ 09:20 AM
    Likes
    846
    Liked 1,229 Times in 448 Posts

    Default

    With rules like that Hogan is going to be a Grandpa fucking quicker than you can say Van Halen/David Lee Roth reunion....
    "Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.Ē -- Gen. George S. Patton

  12. #12
    Good Enough evhslilhottie's Avatar
    Join Date
    07.28.04
    Age
    26
    Posts
    1,841
    Last Online

    01.13.07 @ 11:34 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default

    The Hulk's rules sound eerily like my dad's with me dating.
    So you broke down, trying to leave town, I broke down crying on your return. You left me feeling hopeful, I'll never see your face again. You made for a bad lover's liver. You stole all the covers and busted my head. You made me such an asshole, I wish we'd never met. I'm tired of being bored. I'm through with the headaches. Hiding my hands that tremble like earthquakes. Under the table, under the daytime sky, Good Fucking Bye- Good Fucking Bye, Alkaline Trio

  13. #13
    Good Enough VivaVH's Avatar
    Join Date
    06.09.04
    Location
    Cambridge, OH
    Posts
    1,954
    Favorite VH Album

    Dave - WACF, Sam - FUCK
    Favorite VH Song

    Romeo Delight, Dream is Over
    Last Online

    04.02.15 @ 09:23 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 4 Times in 1 Post


    Donor

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by voivod
    With rules like that Hogan is going to be a Grandpa fucking quicker than you can say Van Halen/David Lee Roth reunion....
    And Brooke will be a widow even faster.
    If it's BROWN, flush it DOWN.

    GO STEELERS!

  14. #14
    Outta Space Cowboy Scotty's Avatar
    Join Date
    01.07.02
    Location
    Virginia, USA
    Posts
    11,030
    Favorite VH Album

    VH I
    Last Online

    12.18.17 @ 12:45 PM
    Likes
    248
    Liked 597 Times in 366 Posts


    Donor

    Default

    Yeah we bumped into Hulk and Brooke during their "mall tour" this year. You could kinda tell she was annoyed by being shadowed by daddy everywhere. lol

  15. #15
    Niners Fan! SactoFan's Avatar
    Join Date
    01.07.00
    Age
    47
    Location
    The Tiki Bar...
    Posts
    9,524
    Favorite VH Album

    Van Halen 2
    Favorite VH Song

    Dance the Night Away
    Last Online

    @
    Likes
    6
    Liked 4 Times in 3 Posts


    Premium Member

    Donor

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by valdez44
    I've got 2 daughters....so some day I will be applying similar rules.

    amen...
    Can't stop...addicted to the shindig...

 

 

Similar Threads

  1. Dating threads
    By Menlow in forum VHLinks Feedback & Troubleshooting
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 05.30.06, 09:42 AM
  2. The Hulk becomes a cop.
    By RRMB in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02.13.06, 09:57 PM
  3. 10 rules for dating my daughter
    By Bob_R in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 01.12.06, 09:36 AM
  4. The Hulk
    By Cabo Kid in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 05.10.02, 11:15 AM
  5. Want to buy Hulk Hogan's boat?
    By Dennis in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 04.18.02, 05:25 PM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •