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  1. #1
    Atomic Punk
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    Default God's Laws and how to follow them...

    ---note: I just happened to find this and thought it would be an interesting read for some---

    From the internet by James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus Dept. of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education, University of Virginia
    Charlottesville, VA 22904-4273

    Dear President Bush,

    Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from you and understand why you would propose a constitutional amendment ban same sex marriage. As you said "in the eyes of God marriage is based between a man a woman." I try to share your knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual relationships, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

    I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.

    1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

    2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

    3. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2. clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

    4. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

    5. Lev.21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

    6. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

    7. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

    8. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev.20:14)

    I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

  2. #2
    The Joker BradS's Avatar
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    I just re-read this. I stopped after the first paragraph and then posted that he was an idiot. Now, after reading the whole thing, I think it is hilarious. This is exactly why homosexual and other "religious" arguments are bullshit.
    Last edited by BradS; 05.25.05 at 09:09 AM. Reason: Re-read whole post

  3. #3
    Top Of The World MackieMan's Avatar
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    Default

    We can't own Canadians?

  4. #4
    Top Of The World stratogibson's Avatar
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    Default Hilarious

    It's true. We all just like to follow the laws which work best for us. Great letter, well thought out. Open your minds friends.
    You know the best tone I ever had was with that little bandmaster cranked to 10. Edward Van Halen, 1980, Guitar Player Magazine.

  5. #5
    Baluchitherium mistere's Avatar
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    Default

    Classic.
    I gotta make a copy of this.

  6. #6
    Eruption Badhorsie551's Avatar
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    Default

    God is my favorite fictional character.
    What do you mean i dont believe in god?
    I talk to him everyday!

  7. #7
    The Joker BradS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by stratogibson
    It's true.
    What's true about it?

    We all just like to follow the laws which work best for us.
    They aren't laws. None of them are.

    Great letter, well thought out.
    What is great about it? How is it well thought out?

    Open your minds friends.
    Open our minds to what? Stupidity?

  8. #8
    The Joker BradS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Badhorsie551
    God is my favorite fictional character.

    LOL!

  9. #9
    Atomic Punk ziggysmalls's Avatar
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    12.13.17 @ 01:41 PM
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    Default

    I am not a bible thumper but I do know this. The chapters that are listed in this "letter" are from the Old Testament. The Old Testament is the basis for Jewish teachings while a Christian would use the New Testament.

    Hasidic Jews would probably follow some of the examples given but not an evengelical person such as Dubya.

    Could throw in anybody who practices Christianity.

    So whomever drafted this is comparing apples and oranges.

  10. #10
    The Joker BradS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ziggysmalls
    I am not a bible thumper but I do know this. The chapters that are listed in this "letter" are from the Old Testament. The Old Testament is the basis for Jewish teachings while a Christian would use the New Testament.
    Ah, so now Christians can pick and choose which parts of the Bible to use? That clears things up a bit. I didn't know that.

  11. #11
    Top Of The World stratogibson's Avatar
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    Sorry I wasn't more clear for the pick apart. It's true that our politicians follow the parts of "Gods Laws" that gain them the most support from their base. If GWB is such a great Christian, then he certainly wouldn't be so trigger happy with the "War" button. But, revenge is popular with his base (Old Testament), so hey baby, look out here we come. Too bad Christ himself wouldn't agree.

    Most people turn to whichever laws they subscribe to. I think the illegality of smoking grass is stupid, so from time to time, I break the law. I think that the illegality of heavy drugs is appropriate, so I don't break those laws. I think we all do it. You've never speeded? Run a "yellow/red" light?

    I think the letter is well thought out because it uses Biblical verse to mock those who use the Bible at justification for their own use. For Dubya to present himself as a Christian is heresy. Christ wouldn't have invaded anybody. Christ would have forgiven. Maybe Christ wouldn't have been a good President.
    Last edited by stratogibson; 05.25.05 at 10:29 AM.
    You know the best tone I ever had was with that little bandmaster cranked to 10. Edward Van Halen, 1980, Guitar Player Magazine.

  12. #12
    The Joker BradS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by stratogibson
    I think the letter is well thought out because it uses Biblical verse to mock those who use the Bible at justification for their own use.
    Now that makes more sense.

  13. #13
    Damage your reputation seenbad's Avatar
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    One of the more stupid and uneducated things I've ever read for mainly two reasons.

    1. All of what he is quoting is from exodus and leviticus. These books were specifically written for the purpose of teaching the Jews how to live under Gods rule. Think about it. If they had never lived under "the law" and then are introduced to life under "the law", the law is bound to be strict and detailed. God is setting the groundwork early for a history there.

    Point is- This was written specifically for a specific culture at a certain time that fit. Yes, many things can still be applied today, but in keeping with the context of the new testiment (see number 2)

    2. The New testiment can also be described as the new covenant or law. Not that it obliviates the old testament rules, but rather it completes them. The laws of Jesus bring maturity to the laws of the OT. For some dork with an agenda, it's so so easy to look at the bible and say/exploit the rule for shellfish, or the "eye for an eye" and point hipocracy at the President for whatever policy. The fact is though, that he is simply not educated, thinks he is, and ends up making a fool of himself when some of these things are corrected.

    Dumb.
    sheepa latta peepah dabba looka foh a moopy

    Gunter glieben glauchen globen

  14. #14
    Top Of The World stratogibson's Avatar
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    Seenbad,

    I think you are right, he should have presented it from the "New Testament" perspective, and included New Testament verse to which our politicians clearly omit sections with which they don't feel benefit them. See George Bush and the Sermon on the Mount for example. Or, Bill Clinton and Parable of the Samaritan for example.
    You know the best tone I ever had was with that little bandmaster cranked to 10. Edward Van Halen, 1980, Guitar Player Magazine.

  15. #15
    The Joker BradS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by seenbad
    Point is- This was written specifically for a specific culture at a certain time that fit. Yes, many things can still be applied today, but in keeping with the context of the new testiment
    So, Christians decided that homosexuality is still "wrong" for our present culture and time, but other things aren't? It's the discretion of man?

    Boy, talk about a spin zone!

 

 

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