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  1. #1
    Atomic Punk Viking's Avatar
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    12.14.17 @ 03:26 PM
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    Default Help! A little Advice.

    I am going to take my girlfriend out to dinner on Friday night. I would like to ask her to marry me at that time. The only problem is, finances are preventing me from buying a ring. I don't know that I should do it if I don't have a ring. It would seem tacky I guess, but she is leaving to go back to Denver on Sat. for a couple of weeks, and then coming back out here for good. I just need a little advice on how to go about this. Do I ask now without a ring, or should I wait until she comes back? Any advice is appreciated.
    "Viking - last to sleep, first to rise, last to leave, that's how the Nords of old rocked the house." ~ timmac in the 'Texas Linkers' thread talking about yours truly. :-)

  2. #2
    Atomic Punk
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    12.11.17 @ 04:37 PM
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Viking
    I am going to take my girlfriend out to dinner on Friday night. I would like to ask her to marry me at that time. The only problem is, finances are preventing me from buying a ring. I don't know that I should do it if I don't have a ring. It would seem tacky I guess, but she is leaving to go back to Denver on Sat. for a couple of weeks, and then coming back out here for good. I just need a little advice on how to go about this. Do I ask now without a ring, or should I wait until she comes back? Any advice is appreciated.

    DO you have much in your 401k? A small loan on your balance would work...
    Oh - and wait till she comes back...
    Last edited by voivod; 04.25.05 at 09:36 AM.

  3. #3
    Atomic Punk chefcraig's Avatar
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    03.07.10 @ 06:18 AM
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    I dunno, Vike...when the wife and I decided to get married, neither of us was exactly rolling in dough, yet we were secure enough in our relationship that a simple gesture was all that was needed. So, in our case, no engagement ring, yet for the wedding, I purchased her a Mickey Mouse watch (as it indeed is a band), and we picked out a cheap skull ring for me.

    About a year later we purchased a proper ring for her, and I'm still waiting for either a very good skull ring or Miami Dolphins one.

    It just depends on how conventional your relationship is...by the way, we got married in the Whole Foods Market that at the time we both worked in.

    I have absolutely no idea if that helps you at all.

    ...craig
    "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
    George Bernard Shaw

  4. #4
    Atomic Punk FH's Avatar
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    10.22.09 @ 11:47 AM
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    Seriously though, is she expecting it? Is it something you've discussed? Personally, if you were going to make this a surprise "event", having a ring is a must.

  5. #5
    Eruption Junior's Avatar
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    12.20.07 @ 05:39 PM
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    Try taking aout a small loan if you can. That's what I did. It should process by the time she gets back out there.

    Besides, if the love is there, you won't need a ring. The words "Will you marry me?" are what makes them go all goofy.

    Good Luck and an early Congratulations!!!

  6. #6
    carpe damn diem billy007's Avatar
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    12.17.17 @ 08:18 AM
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    Sweet story, craig.

    Vike - don't have any good advice for you, but good to hear you're in a keeper situation - you'll come up with something!

  7. #7
    Baluchitherium
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    12.15.17 @ 05:52 AM
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    Vike, it all depends. I dropped a butt-load of money on my wife's engagement ring, but a person that truly loves you would understand the situation you are in. Here's my advice, get her something nice, watch, pendent, something she can wear that shows your love to her, and tell her in the near future you will give her a ring. Hope that helps and doesn't confuse you. Good luck bro!!!
    Rock the Red!!!

    "Give Doc the shotgun. They're less apt to get nervy if he's on the street howitzer."

    "Dying ain't much of a living, boy."

    Save a Terrapin - Fear a Turtle

  8. #8
    Sinner's Swing! vh_chick's Avatar
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    09.05.15 @ 07:55 AM
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    Hey Viking - congratulations! I'm glad you're in a happy relationship.

    If you'd like one girl's point of view, here it is: A ring can really make the moment. If you can swing a small loan, go for it. The idea that an engagement ring should cost a month's pay is ridiculous. That's coming from the diamond people. It's not how much it costs, but if she likes the style!

    If you just can't get a ring, ask her anyway and charm it up! Say something that'll make her heart melt. I wouldn't get any other piece of jewelry - save your money for the ring. But that's your call. Maybe she'd prefer that.

    If you want to ask her Friday, go ahead. She'll be all giddy while she's gone. If you do try for the small loan, she can go ring shopping with you when she gets back. Then when you do have the ring, propose again! This is a must if you don't have the ring the first time.

    Good luck!
    Shari
    Last edited by vh_chick; 04.25.05 at 12:00 PM.
    "Hey, thanks for the bracelet! Was that one for me?" - Michael Anthony to me in the Golden Ring in Grand Rapids, MI July 9, 2004
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  9. #9
    Baluchitherium
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    12.15.17 @ 05:52 AM
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    I also forgot to add something before, you will get more "brownie points" if you design the ring yourself. My wife still brags about me designing it myself then giving it to her. But do whatever your heart desires Vike. I'm just telling you what I did. Once again, good luck bro!!! I'm rooting for ya'...
    Rock the Red!!!

    "Give Doc the shotgun. They're less apt to get nervy if he's on the street howitzer."

    "Dying ain't much of a living, boy."

    Save a Terrapin - Fear a Turtle

  10. #10
    Baluchitherium KT's Avatar
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    08.08.17 @ 07:44 PM
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    OK...I'm now here to confuse you since my viewpoint differs from Shari's. I'm speaking on behalf of myself here. If I were truly in love with someone and wanted nothing else on earth than to spend the rest of my life loving this person and being on an incredible journey with him, then a ring would just be an extra bonus. It certainly would not make or break the proposal for me. The thought of him stealing me away for a special moment just meant for the two of us, looking into my eyes, and convincing me that he loves me and will love me for the rest of his life by simply saying, "Will you spend the rest of your life with ME?" is all I would need and would be bigger and better than any ring on earth. The ring would be SOOOOOO secondary. Some of the most beautiful wedding rings I've seen were given at the wedding and there was no engagement ring. If I had to do it over and do it differently, I'd want my husband to take the time to design (or have someone design) a ring just for me...something no one else on earth will ever have and something that is unique and special for the two of us. THAT, to me, would be most meaningful. Good luck and let us know what you decide to do.
    Meet me in Cabo!

  11. #11
    Sinner's Swing! vh_chick's Avatar
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    09.05.15 @ 07:55 AM
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    kt's idea sounds great, too! And just a little tidbit more: say something besides "Will you marry me?" Try something just a little different. kt's line is good, or "Will you be my wife?" is nice. "I would be honored if you would be my wife."

    Like I said before, charm it up! ;o) Of course, that's my thing. I like charmers. That may not be your girl's thing.

    You'll do great, whatever you decide!

    Shari
    "Hey, thanks for the bracelet! Was that one for me?" - Michael Anthony to me in the Golden Ring in Grand Rapids, MI July 9, 2004
    July 9, 2004 - Mike pressed a guitar pick into my hand!
    "We're in the right place!" EVH @ The Joe in Detroit, July 10, 2004
    "Hey! What's up!?" - Mikey, upon recognizing me in the Golden Ring in Chicago after getting his second bracelet, July 21, 2004
    "What is uuuuuuuuuup!!!???" - Mike to me in Detroit, May 12th, 2005, after receiving third bracelet.
    "You found me again!" - Mike to me in Detroit, Nov. 2, 2007

  12. #12
    Eruption vh resurrection's Avatar
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    03.31.15 @ 05:22 PM
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    Honestly, if she's worth marrying she won't care whether you have a ring when you propose or not. I initially asked my wife to marry me with a ring from a quarter machine at a grocery store. She knew my heart was in it. I did ask her again with a diamond later when I had some more cash.

    Good luck, Vike! Keep us posted.
    "Ladies and Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce the king of 10 fingers and six strings... Mr. Edward Van Halen!"

  13. #13
    Damage your reputation seenbad's Avatar
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    12.15.17 @ 10:48 AM
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    Quote Originally Posted by vh resurrection
    Honestly, if she's worth marrying she won't care whether you have a ring when you propose or not. I initially asked my wife to marry me with a ring from a quarter machine at a grocery store. She knew my heart was in it. I did ask her again with a diamond later when I had some more cash.

    Good luck, Vike! Keep us posted.
    I'd roll with that one. In fact, I'd plan it that way. When you guys go to the store for something and are on the way out, stop at the dumb machine with a quarter. Love will see it's way past the plastic and simply blur her senses with so much emotion at the moment in time that you ask her with it that it will look like the hope diamond. She'd have something to talk about for years and the chances of her cherishing it more than a real one are 10/1. Come back later and do the manly diamond thing when you can. The love is now. Is the diamond? What weighs more now? This is an easy decision.
    sheepa latta peepah dabba looka foh a moopy

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  14. #14
    carpe damn diem billy007's Avatar
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    12.17.17 @ 08:18 AM
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    I believe I recall you've stated you're a karaoke man - why don't you take her to your favourite joint and propose to her mid-song? (Just try to avoid "Why Don't We Get Drunk And Screw"!)

  15. #15
    Good Enough CanCanSingSing's Avatar
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    11.26.17 @ 10:23 PM
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    Don't propose just yet. Wait until you've done something really wrong, or you won't to go out with your mates and then hit her with the proposal. You only get one chance to use this Get Out Of Jail Free Card - don't waste it.
    "In our house, a song was considered shit if it didn't have a big guitar solo on it"- Slash

 

 

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