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  1. #1
    Hang 'Em High RRMB's Avatar
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    05.21.17 @ 06:42 PM
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    Default What The F*** Am I Thinking

    Let me preface this by saying that this is a satirical look at how my life is turning in to complete and utter chaos. It may be funny, it may hit home or it may just miss the mark. But overall, we all seem to be able to vent, share or otherwise talk it out here. So with that:
    That's right Ladies, Gentlemen and "others." From the irrational files of RRMB it's the schitzophrenic What The Fuck Am I Thinking?!?!file.

    Over the past couple of weeks, things in RRMB-land have been less than "ideal." No, shall I say; completely shitty. Long story short, when you work with a bunch of backstabbing, bootlicking, hypocritical ass-hats, eventually it affects your homelife. And you don't know how badly it does until you destroy an heavy duty dog kennel with you bare-hands.* After being telephonically bereated for not accepting any overtime, by siad supervisor of the asshats; I had finally had enough.

    *No animals were hurt in the process of said destruction.

    Sooooooooooooo; the other day, RRMW and I were "loudly discussing" how the RRMB mojo had disappeared from RRMB's life. How I had become angry, unpredictable and, in general, an asshat. She decided to involve a higher power in this crisis; what married guys hate, loathe and fear. The infamous Come To Jesus Meeting!!!

    For the single folk out there in VHLand, it's what happens when a wife reaches her wits end and involves the one thing/being in the problem that you fear among all others. M-O-M

    WOW can that woman make you feel 2 inches tall or what? I swear, my mom is either the tavel agent for Guilt Trip Adventures LLC or the Master Elevator Operator to Make You Feel Like Shit-Land. With in 5 minutes of arrival; she was at her best. She was throwing mind blowing guilt trip knucklers and I was swinging widly at them. Then; she threw out the line that only a mom can deliver with such force yet surgical-like precision, it made the Iraq War "shock & Awe" campaign look like a 4th of July Celebration.
    "You maybe able to bully her in to avoiding you until you decide to come out of this jack-ass mood you're in, BUT, you just remember one thing "young man," (remember, I'm 35) "I'm the one that changed your diapers, you can't bully me."
    D'oh!!!!!!!! She brought out the diaper ammunition. Nothing can bring a man to his knee's quicker than hearing that line.

    The white flag arose soon after that; I figured it was in my best interest to sign a temporary cease fire, in order to figure out what I need to do to make life bearable for RRMWife, RRMDaughter and now RRMMom. As much as I love and cherish RRMW and RRMD; I can't stand what I have become in the last year. It's so bad that my wife told me, AFTER RRMM has softened me up, that I either go on the road again or get out.

    So...with those options; I have decided to go on the road again. As much as I hate missing out on things when I am gone, I'd rather miss out on them than not be a part of them at all. So in the next week or so, my posting here will dramatically decrease. At least until I get a laptop with WiFi and dial up capabilities.*

    *IF anyone has a decent laptop with DVD/CD-RW that can be set up with an 811.2 WiFi card and at least 30G HD they want to ditch, shoot me a PM
    Sooooooo, with that, I now leave for my DOT physical to determine when I will leave and return to Schneider National. (the big orange semi's)

    I will be running out of Iowa City, Iowa going as anywhere as far west as Colorado, down to Texas, over to the Southeastern US, up to the Northeastern US and back over to Iowa City. Along the way, I hope to personally meet some of you. I hope that can be accomplished; because I consider you all an extention of family, in a strange way. This has been a place of solice, petty fights (right Wray) and overall happy times surrounding the life we know and love in Van Halen.

    So, until later today; I bid you adieu(?) and must get to the Dr. so he can tell me I'm out of shape still. Maybe he'll laugh when I tell him a trapezoid is a shape; the round is a shape has lost it's effect.
    "Jesus, that fucker just crawled out of his hen house that was destroyed by the Alabama tornados. Fucking 280mph plus winds sucked the gleam off this bitch and passed it on to a bird in Rhoad Island." - Hurricane Halen 5/3/11 (about my birthday chicken from seenbad)

    "Pete is this big, loud muthafucker with a big ass heart, y'all!!!!---------" - Hurricane Halen 9/27/13

    "Princess Freckle-Tits hasn't had a good day." LLFHS 7/8/10 (on Lindsay Lohans' legal drama)


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  2. #2
    Baluchitherium
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    12.11.17 @ 04:03 AM
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    Donor

    Damn RRMB, sorry things aren't going to well in your life right now. "It" does kick you in the balls sometimes, but you just have to get back up and keep trucking (pun somewhat intended)

    If you are ever in the DC area give me a shout and we'll throw back a few malted beverages (or whatever you prefer). Until then, keep your head up and things will eventually work out for the better. I'm talking from personal experience...

    Here's for ya'!!!
    Rock the Red!!!

    "Give Doc the shotgun. They're less apt to get nervy if he's on the street howitzer."

    "Dying ain't much of a living, boy."

    Save a Terrapin - Fear a Turtle

  3. #3
    carpe damn diem billy007's Avatar
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    12.11.17 @ 08:10 PM
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    Default

    Not necessarily a bad thing - the ol' "absence makes a heart grow fonder" thing. I kinda envy you actually - I'd love to be able to escape to the open road and be paid for it, but last I checked no one was paying good money to drive an automobile around the country, and nobody in their right mind would ever want to see me get behind the wheel of anything larger than your average Buick!

    Good luck and check in as often as you can - remember, lots of hotels now offer free internet!

  4. #4
    Hang 'Em High RRMB's Avatar
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    05.21.17 @ 06:42 PM
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by billy007
    Not necessarily a bad thing - the ol' "absence makes a heart grow fonder" thing.
    No, in my case it's "absensce makes the hearts stay together." LOL


    I kinda envy you actually - I'd love to be able to escape to the open road and be paid for it, but last I checked no one was paying good money to drive an automobile around the country, and nobody in their right mind would ever want to see me get behind the wheel of anything larger than your average Buick!
    Oh, make no mistake, there is no escape. You are somewhat trapped behind that wheel. And limited to the places you can get to. But at the same time, when you hit the open road and are out in the Western part of the country, you swear that you have just seen the most beautiful place on earth; just to come over the crest and see something far more beautiful.

    Then, there are times when you are in Texas. I swear that state can't be any flatter OR drab. If you like seeing lots of brown, intermixed with patches of green, the Southwestern part of the country is where you want to be.

    And believe me, the Midwest and Plains states aren't much better; just greener...Until winter, then it's all Texas, but fuckin cold.

    Good luck and check in as often as you can - remember, lots of hotels now offer free internet!
    Why get a hotel?? I have everything I need in a truck; minus the shower and toilet, but that's what truckstops are for. If I get WiFi, I don't even have to leave the truck. No WiFi access, run in and hook up to a phone line.
    "Truckin' ain't just for rednecks no more." "We done gone and went a gots hi-tech on ya's."

    Believe it or not Billy, driving a semi is much easier than it looks. Well, unless you're under a dispatch to Chicago, New York City or the Northeastern part of the country, that was designed and STAYED the way it was before semi's were rumbling along their roads. Nuttin' like trying to navigate 70-some-odd-feet of truck through New England.

    OR when you're going down the backside of a mountain range.

    You hear a lot about Donner Pass, The Ozarks, Oak Ridge and Shenendoah mountain ranges. But when you try slowing down 80,000 pounds on them, you have a whole new appreciation for driving.
    Last edited by RRMB; 03.01.05 at 09:00 AM.
    "Jesus, that fucker just crawled out of his hen house that was destroyed by the Alabama tornados. Fucking 280mph plus winds sucked the gleam off this bitch and passed it on to a bird in Rhoad Island." - Hurricane Halen 5/3/11 (about my birthday chicken from seenbad)

    "Pete is this big, loud muthafucker with a big ass heart, y'all!!!!---------" - Hurricane Halen 9/27/13

    "Princess Freckle-Tits hasn't had a good day." LLFHS 7/8/10 (on Lindsay Lohans' legal drama)


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  5. #5
    Eruption vh resurrection's Avatar
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    03.31.15 @ 05:22 PM
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    Default

    Good luck getting yourself straightened out RRMB. I've been getting a little... "moody" lately myself. When you start thinking how much fun it would be to just tear shit up you know you gotta calm down.
    I also would like to say that I just plain enjoyed reading your post.
    "Ladies and Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce the king of 10 fingers and six strings... Mr. Edward Van Halen!"

  6. #6
    Good Enough weesfreewheelin's Avatar
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    07.19.17 @ 06:26 PM
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    Default

    The world needs ditch diggers
    Know Roth
    Know Van Halen

    No Roth
    No Van Halen

  7. #7
    Hang 'Em High RRMB's Avatar
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    05.21.17 @ 06:42 PM
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by weesfreewheelin
    The world needs ditch diggers

    Yeah...but mass murder and mass graves are illegal still.

    As for me. Just got done making all the phone calls and it looks like next Sunday I'll be heading for Green Bay to get "re-Schneider-ized."

    It's amazing how calm I am right now; considering what I posted above. Hell, I may have to make this thread a running log of my travels and experiences.
    "Jesus, that fucker just crawled out of his hen house that was destroyed by the Alabama tornados. Fucking 280mph plus winds sucked the gleam off this bitch and passed it on to a bird in Rhoad Island." - Hurricane Halen 5/3/11 (about my birthday chicken from seenbad)

    "Pete is this big, loud muthafucker with a big ass heart, y'all!!!!---------" - Hurricane Halen 9/27/13

    "Princess Freckle-Tits hasn't had a good day." LLFHS 7/8/10 (on Lindsay Lohans' legal drama)


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  8. #8
    Atomic Punk jrk5150's Avatar
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    12.11.17 @ 07:48 PM
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    Donor

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Redrockinmonkeyboy
    Hell, I may have to make this thread a running log of my travels and experiences.
    Not a bad idea dude, life on the road with a linker, meetin other linkers, etc.

    I'd read that thread

  9. #9
    Hang 'Em High Hurricane Halen's Avatar
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    12.11.17 @ 11:20 PM
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    Default

    RRMB, look bro, if you EVER travel thru or stay overnight in Shreveport, let me know!

    And that city again is...........SHREVEPORT LOUISIANA! Lies between Dallas and Jackson Ms, on I-20, which runs east to west. Just look for the 400,000 population of brothers and sisters kissing each other, and walking their pet ALLIGATORS!!!!

    HH <-----------Gonna treat RRMB to a meal at the, "Choke and Puke"----
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  10. #10
    Atomic Punk
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    05.31.14 @ 08:17 PM
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    Default

    I'm just glad to see you use the phrase: "Asshat"

    It is a phase used only by MEN who know their ass from a hole in the ground. So there is hope

    I would also recommend the phrase: "Assclown" as well, to break up your word use.
    Last edited by Axxman300; 03.01.05 at 04:49 PM.
    "Nothing is ever what it seems but everything is exactly what it is." - B. Banzai


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  11. #11
    Unchained Stidham's Avatar
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    10.11.14 @ 03:02 AM
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    Default

    RRMB good luck.... I've been close to where you are. Just didn't have the opportunity to go on the road.. I'm 6'2 250, and my mom is about 5'2 120... made me feel like a freaking 2 year old.

    It sucks being an adult some times.

    If you ever make through St. Louis, shoot me a PM and we'll throw a couple back...

    Later,
    Dave
    Ladies and gentlemen, hobos and tramps, Cross-eyed mosquitoes and bowlegged ants; I'm here before you to stand behind you To tell you something I know nothing about... ~Sammy Hagar

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  12. #12
    Eruption blacknblue's Avatar
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    09.13.06 @ 09:37 PM
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    Aaaahhhhhhh, RRMB! I'm so sorry! (Didn't know you were married/committed, though -- didn't you kind of make a pass at me once?) Oh, I don't care. I feel so bad for you, I'm almost willing to give you a blow job! <wink>
    Honey, I ain't through with you!

    GO ILLINI!!!!!!!

  13. #13
    Good Enough Thai Boxer 9901's Avatar
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    08.28.16 @ 11:47 PM
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by blacknblue
    Aaaahhhhhhh, RRMB! I'm so sorry! (Didn't know you were married/committed, though -- didn't you kind of make a pass at me once?) Oh, I don't care. I feel so bad for you, I'm almost willing to give you a blow job! <wink>
    .....wow lol

    Anyways dude, I hope the open road does ya some good. I know what you mean by just getting out and getting away from it all cuz thats what I feel like doing right now but unfortunatley, I cant so the only "escape" I have is here and when I play. So hang in there bud
    Facebook http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=504401115
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  14. #14
    Hang 'Em High RRMB's Avatar
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    05.21.17 @ 06:42 PM
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by blacknblue
    Aaaahhhhhhh, RRMB! I'm so sorry! (Didn't know you were married/committed, though -- didn't you kind of make a pass at me once?) Oh, I don't care. I feel so bad for you, I'm almost willing to give you a blow job! <wink>

    Umm, err, duhhhhhh, bluuuuuuuhhhhhmmmm, derrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, ummmmmmm, hmmmm-mmmm, heh



    Hey, I'll be through Chicago quite a bit; maybe we can hook up??? NOT LIKE THAT YOU PERVS!!!
    "Jesus, that fucker just crawled out of his hen house that was destroyed by the Alabama tornados. Fucking 280mph plus winds sucked the gleam off this bitch and passed it on to a bird in Rhoad Island." - Hurricane Halen 5/3/11 (about my birthday chicken from seenbad)

    "Pete is this big, loud muthafucker with a big ass heart, y'all!!!!---------" - Hurricane Halen 9/27/13

    "Princess Freckle-Tits hasn't had a good day." LLFHS 7/8/10 (on Lindsay Lohans' legal drama)


    http://www.facebook.com/RedRockinMonkeyBoy

    CHILDREN OF "THE FOOT" UNITE

  15. #15
    Hang 'Em High RRMB's Avatar
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    05.21.17 @ 06:42 PM
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Axxman300
    I'm just glad to see you use the phrase: "Asshat"

    It is a phase used only by MEN who know their ass from a hole in the ground. So there is hope

    I would also recommend the phrase: "Assclown" as well, to break up your word use.

    Lately I've been calling a couple of the extreme asshats, assmatter. Does that count??

    Also, to those that want me to try and hook up with them on the road. It may take a few passes through your area before that happens. A lot of the free time I'll get will be either early in the day; or later in the evening; after dinner time.

    But...I will make it a point to get as many numbers and email addy's as possible. I'm hoping to get a laptop and WiFi, a the very least dial up, so I can contact people if I'm gonna be in an area long enough. Sounds like the most of our runs from the Proctor & Gamble in Iowa City encompass everything from Kansas to Pennsylvania; from Minnesota to Texas and over to Florida, so the chances at hooking up are pretty decent for the linkers in that wide swath. I know I'll be out at least 2 weekends a month, and that's usually when they have us reset our legal hours to run. Long, drawn out proceedure easily discussed over a beer.

    By the way, anyone know of a good place online to buy a realityly tricked out laptop, without having to pawn of your right nut?
    Last edited by RRMB; 03.01.05 at 09:38 PM.
    "Jesus, that fucker just crawled out of his hen house that was destroyed by the Alabama tornados. Fucking 280mph plus winds sucked the gleam off this bitch and passed it on to a bird in Rhoad Island." - Hurricane Halen 5/3/11 (about my birthday chicken from seenbad)

    "Pete is this big, loud muthafucker with a big ass heart, y'all!!!!---------" - Hurricane Halen 9/27/13

    "Princess Freckle-Tits hasn't had a good day." LLFHS 7/8/10 (on Lindsay Lohans' legal drama)


    http://www.facebook.com/RedRockinMonkeyBoy

    CHILDREN OF "THE FOOT" UNITE

 

 

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