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  1. #1
    Atomic Punk Van Squalen's Avatar
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    Default Let's Get It Straight - What Kind of Van Halen Fan Are You?

    Time to let it all hang out...don't be afraid, it's only a message board. So at the end of the day, bottom line, where must you place yourself in the various classes of nobility within the Van Halen Kingdom? Be honest. History won't judge you if you jump ship down the road...isn't that what being a Halenite is all about?

    The Davegraver.

    Aw yeah. You know who you are. Not only do you despise what that fat fuck Spammy Gaydar did to the band, you're of the opinion that Dave should never ever return even given the chance, as it would only tarnish his legendary shine, especially the way Ed's handled things since '85. You know goddamned well Dave was almost entirely responsible for the band's success, as well as its legacy. Real Van Halen fans know without question that Van Halen's about the swig and swagger, the fuck you charisma, the down and dirty hot guitar and masterful lyrical and improvisational command of the best fuckin' songs ever to hit the airwaves, the Six Pack Extraordinaire.

    The Super Chedhead.

    The Red Rocker rules in your book. To be honest, you never thought Dave was all that special...sure, the 6pak's a great set of course, but the dude sucked live, the spandex wore thin and the schtick wore thinner. Sam's got the pipes and the laid back 'tude, and other than a few keyboard heavy ballads here and there, took Van Halen to new and better heights of rock and fucking roll. Plus, come on...Heavy Metal and Bad Motor Scooter blow doors off Just Like Paradise and Hammerhead Shark. In other words...Dave who?

    The Judah Goat.

    Yep, you're in a strange, wonderful, and relatively small group. You truly believe that Gary Cherone was a step in the best direction for ol' Edwardo. The axework and completely different sound and fury on '3' was a breath of badly needed air for Van Halen, in your opinion, and more than that, Gary could sing Roth or Hagar tunes with equal grace. Cherone was a near perfect match for Ed's ever-growing roots of necessary change. Damn Warner Brothers and the idiotic public for not letting there being a '3' Mach II. Damn them all to hell.

    The EVH Apologist.

    You could care less who sings for Mister Edward All Mighty More-Powerful-Than-God Van Halen. You've always wanted that instrumental or solo album from the King of Axes. Heck, you don't even care if his brother's playin' percussion for him. Lita Ford, Mitch Malloy, Patty Smythe, potato-potahto, it's all the same, as long as Eddie plays, you're there. Lyrics shmryics. It's the reason you picked up Thriller and Starfleet and the Twister soundtrack, for God's sake.

    The Fence Straddler.

    Yeah, you're nobody's fool. It's all good. Dave or Sam, just keep the Halen coming, you don't care. You can appreciate the raw hardcore years with Dave, you can dig the pop tech of the latter years with Sam. It's not about this guy or that guy, it's just about the entity. It'd be nice if the sucker produced more goods, though. Reunions with any three of the singers are welcomed in your book...fuck, if it means a new album and tour, you'll teach Gary to spin a baton, you'll force Sam to sing some stuff off WACF, you'll instruct Dave in the finer points of making those high notes on Cabo Wabo...as long as it mean more Van Halen, in any form.


    Okay, so basically, to start it all off, I'm A Fence Straddler myself, although I have a proviso...I'm Dave or Sam. I admit, I'm biased, so I can't say I'm Dave or Sam or Gary. Guess I'm a Fence Straddler with Conditions.


  2. #2
    Atomic Punk
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    Favorite VH Album

    1978-1996
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    1978-1996
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    12.23.16 @ 10:32 AM
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    Riding the fence.....love it all......




  3. #3
    On Fire crazyjbn's Avatar
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    01.10.04
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    Favorite VH Album

    fw/f^&
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    12.17.17 @ 05:45 PM
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    Default

    fence all the way
    DAVE vs SAMMY

    People need to let this go.....it is like comparing an ex wife to your current wife...you can say how things would have be different if she were still here but she left you, so you moved on with your life.....


    Same with Van Halen...would they have liked to have Roth stay, yes...but he decided to leave so they moved on.......

    and the rest is history….. well until 1996……..lol

    http://forums.delphiforums.com/strictlyace750

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  4. #4
    Eruption Infinite Cactus's Avatar
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    Favorite VH Album

    MCMLXXXIV
    Favorite VH Song

    Dirty Movies/Mean Street
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    12.13.17 @ 04:02 PM
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    Default

    Im in a category thats basically Hagar/Cherone. As much as I love the old stuff, I just wish Dave wasn't all pompousy all the time. Thats why I like Cherone, great guy, even after the public and the brothers shit on him he never said a bad thing about any of it. And Hagar's voice rocks. I got a lot of his solo stuff. Dave was, and is cool, make no mistake, but just watching him fuck up every song from the 83 us fest is enough to make me want to punch him in the face. I would welcome his return, as long as I didnt have to deal with Diamond Dave, and I just had to deal with regular kick your ass Dave. Also, It would be a downer to never hear a Hagar song again, but I think if he was open to it, he could do pretty good on a couple of 'em.
    Van Halen Reunion Tour
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    "It's a little hot in here tonight!"


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    Louisville, Kentucky February 28th, 2012

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  5. #5
    Atomic Punk Van Squalen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Infinite Cactus
    Im in a category thats basically Hagar/Cherone.
    So let's call that...a Judah Ched?

  6. #6
    The Frantic Antic TopTimi's Avatar
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    Olive um
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    Everybody Wants Some!!!
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    06.14.13 @ 10:39 PM
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    Hey great comments on all factors here Van Squalen.

    Even though it sounds kinda gay, I'm fencing with 'ya baby!

  7. #7
    Atomic Punk Van Squalen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TopTimi
    Hey great comments on all factors here Van Squalen.

    Even though it sounds kinda gay, I'm fencing with 'ya baby!
    Don't worry, man. If there's one thing neither Dave nor Sam ever had to worry about, it was being thought of as 'gay.'


    Um...

    Never mind.

  8. #8
    The Atomic Punk
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    Favorite VH Album

    fair warning
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    unchained
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    12.22.07 @ 10:11 AM
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    an evh apologist edd rules!!!! he is vanhalen

    my site (no www) tromollo.tripod.com
    Last edited by joey-tromollo; 01.22.05 at 05:02 PM.

  9. #9
    Baluchitherium KT's Avatar
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    Favorite VH Album

    5150
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    Humans Being,5150,WhenIt'sLove
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    08.08.17 @ 07:44 PM
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    A Definite Redhead!

    I definitely fit into the Super Chedhead category. However, there are a few Dave-era songs that rank up in my top 10 VH songs of all time. I believe a lot of it has to do with my age. When I was old enough to listen to and appreciate good music, 1984 had just been released. So, my jr. high, high school, and college years were spent listening to Sammy era VH. I can relate almost every song from 5150, OU812, F.U.C.K., and even Balance to a memorable time in my younger days. As much as I love Sammy (his character, voice, attitude, etc.) I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that it's the music I grew up with. I have a deep appreciation for all eras, though.
    Meet me in Cabo!

  10. #10
    Atomic Punk fast98dodge's Avatar
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    Seattle
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    Van Halen II
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    08.07.17 @ 08:14 PM
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    Rider of the Fence
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    Austin Speaker Works KTS-60

  11. #11
    Casting Shade
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    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning
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    Light Up The Sky
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    05.04.08 @ 05:05 PM
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    Default

    Fence straddler for me all the way!
    "Rehab is for Quitters"

    "It is not possible to have life after death since death is the end of life." -OV

    "What doesn’t kill you, will only make you pissed off!"
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    "If I know I'm going crazy...I must not be insane." -Dave Mustaine

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  12. #12
    Eruption Perrott's Avatar
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    Canada
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    Favorite VH Album

    Women And Children First
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    Romeo Delight
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    08.30.06 @ 10:32 AM
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    Default

    Fencin' it up

  13. #13
    Atomic Punk LLFHS's Avatar
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    Favorite VH Album

    Anything Mike played on
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    Anything Mike played on
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    07.30.17 @ 08:59 PM
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    I've been riding that fence so long I'm shitting splinters.
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    Your Hacked Nude Photo Here!

  14. #14
    Hot For Teacher
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    F.U.C.K.
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    The Dream Is Over
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    10.06.17 @ 08:45 PM
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    I have to say I am the fence straddler.

  15. #15
    Sinner's Swing! emm5150's Avatar
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    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning
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    Mean Street
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    Fence!

 

 

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