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  1. #1
    Baluchitherium
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    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
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    Adam Sandler's New Song

    The Masturbata (sung to the tune of the Macaraena)

    Sitting in my house, and I know that I'm alona,
    Feeling kinda horny, got a jingle in my bona.
    Go and grab a Penthouse its the one with Sharon Stona.
    Hey Masturbata!!

    I go a little faster and its feeling kinda nicea,
    Once ain't enough so I have to do it twicea.
    If you wanna spank the monkey I can give you good advicea.
    Hey Masturbata!!

    I use some baby oil or a little vaselina,
    Laying down a towel so I keep my carpet cleana.
    Never shake my hand cause you don't know where its beena.
    Hey Masturbata!!

    I do it in the car when I'm driving down the streeta,
    One hand on the whell and my other on my meata.
    I can't get out the car cause I'm sticking to the seata.
    Hey Masturbata!!

    Since I was a kid I have been a Masterbata,
    choke the chicken, hum the nob, squeezing the tomata.
    I've looked at Ms. November now I'm gonna decorate her.
    Hey Masturbata!!

    Buffing the banana, Mr. Lizard shaking bacona,
    Pounding on the flouder and its mayonnaise I'm makinga.
    Spank the frank, wax the carrot, god my hand is achinga.
    Hey Masturbata!!
    [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<br /><br />God Bless the USA!!!!<br />~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  2. #2
    Atomic Punk Wolfman's Avatar
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    07.20.17 @ 03:43 PM
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    Oh my goodness. [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]

  3. #3
    Baluchitherium JWS_5150's Avatar
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    05.18.09 @ 11:19 PM
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    Donor

    [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]

    I'm one of those crazies on your block.

    writing

  4. #4
    PM Goo with your concerns OLO's Avatar
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    12.16.17 @ 04:10 PM
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    LMAO [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
    ((Just My Two Cents))
    And thats about what its worth.

  5. #5
    Baluchitherium
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    09.15.15 @ 08:40 AM
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    sweet! that will come in handy when i... never mind [img]smilies/redface.gif[/img]
    [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

  6. #6
    Atomic Punk Wolfman's Avatar
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    07.20.17 @ 03:43 PM
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    <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by laner:
    sweet! that will come in handy when i... never mind [img]smilies/redface.gif[/img]
    [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    "handy" would be the word. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

    Just curious, Baritone or Tenor, laner? [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img] LOL [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

  7. #7
    Damage your reputation seenbad's Avatar
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    12.15.17 @ 10:48 AM
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    Donor

    quote:
    Originally posted by ANGEL4U:
    Feeling kinda horny, got a jingle in my bona.



    Thats just beggin for a quote of its own [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] Tempted to put that in the ol'e sig. lol.
    sheepa latta peepah dabba looka foh a moopy

    Gunter glieben glauchen globen

  8. #8
    Baluchitherium
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    09.15.15 @ 08:40 AM
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    <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Wolfman:


    Just curious, Baritone or Tenor, laner? [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img] LOL [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>usually tenor, but suprano on a good day... [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

    and on that note, i'd like to stop with these jokes before i gain myself a false reputation... [img]smilies/redface.gif[/img]

  9. #9
    Eruption
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    02.27.09 @ 02:39 AM
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    Remind me never to shake YOUR hand then...

    [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
    It'll all end in beers...

  10. #10
    Sinner's Swing! Rick S's Avatar
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    06.23.17 @ 09:49 PM
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    ill wear gloves [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
    www.rickshick.tumblr.com

    1love4chi

    Deftones , now and forever and only second to VH.

    Dave or Sammy ?.........pffffft Eddie.

  11. #11
    Eruption
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    02.27.09 @ 02:39 AM
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    Tacit agreement fellas. Let's ALL wear gloves huh? [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
    It'll all end in beers...

  12. #12
    Sinner's Swing! Rick S's Avatar
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    06.23.17 @ 09:49 PM
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    hell any man who hasnt wacked the weasel is a liar...and i myself can identify with those lyrics which is why its so damn funny !
    www.rickshick.tumblr.com

    1love4chi

    Deftones , now and forever and only second to VH.

    Dave or Sammy ?.........pffffft Eddie.

  13. #13
    Baluchitherium
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    05.12.06 @ 06:39 PM
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    Funny shit! LOL [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
    I am awesome

  14. #14
    Baluchitherium
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    09.15.15 @ 08:40 AM
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    yeah this is funny shit. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] gloves it is!!! funny how a girl posts this topic and only guys post replies... [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
    oh yeah, i can also identify with rick...
    a friend once told me that 98 percent of all men masturbate, and the other 2 percent are liars. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

  15. #15
    Webmaster/Graphic Artist Top Timmy's Avatar
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    10.28.16 @ 08:45 PM
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    Ok, my eyes are full of water now. That was fucking great. Sandler strikes again. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
    Webmaster/Graphic Artist
    VHLinks.com - Your Van Halen Internet Resource Guide
    http://www.vhlinks.com

 

 

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