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  1. #1
    Good Enough
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    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
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    Statistics show that 60% of women admit to masturbating. Notice I wrote, "admit?" That's because statistics are about as believable as OJ on the stand. But for the sake of stats, here goes: 20% of women under 30 years of age masturbate once a week, and 7% do it every other day. As well, females, on average, begin masturbating at about 14 or 15 years old.
    So why don't all women masturbate? Simply put, they don't have to. For the most part, women can basically bed a man as quickly and easily as Roseanne can gobble down a tub of Haagen Daasz. Albeit, the less attractive women will have to lower their standards, but penises have been offered to all women from the moment they hit adolescence.

    Guys, on the other hand, have to spend the majority of their lives pursuing women and trying to score sex, therefore masturbation becomes somewhat necessary for survival. So one would think that masturbation for women is optional, and not necessary. But is it? Perhaps if more women took the time to explore their own bodies, they'd discover their sexual likes and dislikes and be able to achieve orgasm more easily.

    Tiptoe through the two lips



    There are a multitude of reasons why women masturbate. The following are the most popular:

    Lonely
    Sometimes women come out of a relationship and because they refuse to just delve into sex with just anyone, they resort to feeding their slot in solitaire. After having gotten sex at will from their boyfriends, it's difficult to accept that they're going to have to wait to find yet another "Mr. Right" before they can have an orgasm again.

    Excitement
    A stirring of the senses or the mind may cause a woman's hand to venture down to the cave every so often. Whether it be a Harlequin romance novel, watching (or hearing) the neighbors go at it from across the way, or reminiscing about the aggressive sex the two of you had a couple of nights ago, an excited woman may opt to satisfy her animalistic sexual urges right away.

    Insecure
    Some women begin to masturbate because they feel that they're too overweight or unattractive to be touched by a man. Because they feel "unsexy," they resort to having sex with themselves rather than sharing themselves with a man.

    Plain Horny
    Some women become so excited for the smallest reasons or simply think about sex so often, that they feel the need to constantly let their hands complete the job that their minds initiate. The kind of woman who knows exactly how to get herself off and does so whenever she feels like petting the petunia.

    Not Satisfied
    Some women end up in relationships in which their men either finish up after three strokes (hence the three-pump chump) or worse yet, their men don't even care if they reach satisfaction. That, or these women can't find it in themselves to release their sexual inhibitions completely, so they rush off to the washroom after sex and satisfy themselves.

    They're The Best
    There are women that are unable to achieve orgasm any other way besides through masturbation. Because they feel that they're the only ones who really know which spots to hit and at which rate of aggression and velocity, they resort to masturbation in order to attain sexual satisfaction.
    <a href="http://www.vhwalkathon.org" target="_blank">VHWalkathon - Project 316</a><br /><br />EVH: The music is first and foremost. That's the way it's always been and that's the way it will always be. Because without the music, what is there? Nothing. There's nothing without the music. You can't even cop an attitude without the music (laughs).

  2. #2
    Damage your reputation seenbad's Avatar
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    11.30.17 @ 06:15 PM
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    Donor

    Wow. You think God still has your picture on his refrigerator? [img]smile.gif[/img]
    sheepa latta peepah dabba looka foh a moopy

    Gunter glieben glauchen globen

  3. #3
    Webmaster/Graphic Artist Top Timmy's Avatar
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    10.28.16 @ 08:45 PM
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    Originally posted by seenbad:
    Wow. You think God still has your picture on his refrigerator? [img]smile.gif[/img]
    God is a loving god..bawhahaha

    [ February 25, 2002 at 02:42 PM: Message edited by: Top Timmy ]

    Webmaster/Graphic Artist
    VHLinks.com - Your Van Halen Internet Resource Guide
    http://www.vhlinks.com

  4. #4
    Good Enough
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    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
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    I dont know....I just went blind....
    <a href="http://www.vhwalkathon.org" target="_blank">VHWalkathon - Project 316</a><br /><br />EVH: The music is first and foremost. That's the way it's always been and that's the way it will always be. Because without the music, what is there? Nothing. There's nothing without the music. You can't even cop an attitude without the music (laughs).

  5. #5
    Baluchitherium Guitar Shark's Avatar
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    03.01.10 @ 10:22 AM
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    Donor


  6. #6
    Good Enough
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    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
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    GS??? I dont get it????
    <a href="http://www.vhwalkathon.org" target="_blank">VHWalkathon - Project 316</a><br /><br />EVH: The music is first and foremost. That's the way it's always been and that's the way it will always be. Because without the music, what is there? Nothing. There's nothing without the music. You can't even cop an attitude without the music (laughs).

  7. #7
    Baluchitherium Guitar Shark's Avatar
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    03.01.10 @ 10:22 AM
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    Donor

    Originally posted by Fabulous Shadow aka VHL:
    GS??? I dont get it????
    Just a joke Lisa... don't take it personally. You've started a lot of threads today, it just seemed like you were spamming the place. [img]smile.gif[/img] Must be a boring Monday at work.

  8. #8
    Atomic Punk Wolfman's Avatar
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    07.20.17 @ 03:43 PM
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    Nothing wrong with livening up the board a little bit.

  9. #9
    Atomic Punk Wolfman's Avatar
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    07.20.17 @ 03:43 PM
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    back on the subject...does my WHAT masturbate?

  10. #10
    Atomic Punk Eddymon's Avatar
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    12.10.17 @ 08:14 AM
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    No,
    Thats what I have a handy man for. [img]graemlins/sssh.gif[/img]
    'Old Van Halen, when I was in it-classic Van Halen-makes you wanna drink, dance and screw, right? And the new Van Halen encourages you to drink milk, drive a Nissan and have a relationship.' - David Lee Roth.

  11. #11
    Unchained
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    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
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    Hay Fabulous Shadow,did you have a great week end or what? All your post ranging from masturbateing,men,god,and catholics.these all go together,I should know i'm catholic.LOL [img]graemlins/bounce.gif[/img]
    "I Want The Best! Of Both Worlds!<br />AAAAAAWWWWWWWWW-Van Halen Live With Out A Net.

  12. #12
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    08.17.07 @ 05:09 PM
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    Originally posted by (DEJA VU):
    All your post ranging from masturbateing,men,god,and catholics.these all go together,I should know i'm catholic.LOL [img]graemlins/bounce.gif[/img]
    LMAO!!
    "May you die at age 128, in bed, shot to death by a jealous lover" DLR 2002

  13. #13
    Damage your reputation seenbad's Avatar
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    11.30.17 @ 06:15 PM
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    Donor

    Whats up with this forum today!

    This is a little over the top too. Gonna close now.

    *whistling "Spring is in the air".....*
    sheepa latta peepah dabba looka foh a moopy

    Gunter glieben glauchen globen

  14. #14
    Sinner's Swing! chewbaccamonkeylunch's Avatar
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    02.16.16 @ 06:50 AM
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    Donor

    Shits and giggles...............
    The trashman was my hero.......
    -Seenbad

  15. #15
    Baluchitherium KT's Avatar
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    08.08.17 @ 07:44 PM
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    Default

    HOLY SHIT!!! I just snarfed iced tea all over the monitor and then choked on it after reading this thread title!
    Last edited by KT; 07.01.05 at 02:33 PM.
    Meet me in Cabo!

 

 

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