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  1. #1
    Unchained
    Join Date
    06.13.01
    Location
    Bay Area *cough* California
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    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
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    Recently I came upon this except from the "Dilbert Newsletter" and I thought you might enjoy it [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

    <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Duh-Children Are Not Our Future
    -------------------------------

    Several DNRC savants suggested that instead of calling young
    Induhviduals juvenile duhlinquents they be called a-duh-lescents.
    I thought that was funny until I read the shocking story in
    Newsweek that said the average I.Q. of kids has risen from 100
    to 120 over the past 50 years! (Seriously) I would like to have
    been a fly on the wall during the meeting when the experts
    talked about the possible causes of this brightening.

    Expert 1: "Let's see, during the past 50 years the quality of
    public schools has declined, so we can rule out education as a
    cause of increased intelligence. What else was going on?"

    Expert 2: "Drug use and teen pregnancies skyrocketed. Maybe
    those things make you smarter."

    (long silence)

    Expert 1: "Anyone else? Anything at all?"

    Expert 3: "There was more pollution."

    Expert 1: "C'MON! We can't say pollution makes you smarter!!!"

    A young intern, probably a DNRC member, pipes in.

    Intern: "We could say that watching television and playing
    video games stimulates kids' brains and makes them smarter.
    The media will think that's good for their businesses so they'll
    quote us and we'll be famous. We might even get dates."

    (long silence, everyone glances at each other)

    And so it was that MTV and video games and other vaguely
    defined "stimulation" were credited with making kids smarter.
    Dilbert comics weren't specifically mentioned as a cause but
    I think that's understood. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
    <b><i>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<br />Darkness, imprisoning me.<br />All that I see: absolute horror.<br />I cannot live<br />I cannot die<br />Trapped in myself<br />Body my holding cell<br />~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<br /></i></b>

  2. #2
    Baluchitherium
    Join Date
    06.10.00
    Posts
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    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
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    Thanks!!! I got something I want to pass on, also. I don't know if it's true, though [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]


    WHAT TO DO IF YOU GET A TRAFFIC TICKET
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt;
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; This system has been tried and it works in every state.
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; If you get a speeding ticket or went through a red light or
    &gt; whatever
    &gt; &gt; &gt; the
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; case may be, and you're going to get points on your license.
    This
    &gt; is
    &gt; &gt; a
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; method to ensure that you DO NOT get the points.
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt;
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; When you get your fine, send in a check to pay for it. If the
    fine
    &gt; &gt; is
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; $79.00 make the check out for $82.00 or some small amount over
    the
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; fine.The system will then have to send you back a check for the
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; difference,
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; however here is the trick.
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt;
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; DO NOT CASH THE REFUND CHECK!! Throw it away!
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt;
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; Points are not assessed to your license until all financial
    &gt; &gt; &gt; transactions
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; are complete. If you do not cash the check, then the
    transactions
    &gt; &gt; are
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; NOT
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; complete. The system has received its money and is satisfied
    and
    &gt; &gt; will
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; no
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; longer bother you.
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt;
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; This information comes from an unmentionable computer company
    that
    &gt; &gt; &gt; sets
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; up the standard databases used by every state.
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt;
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; Send this to everyone you know. You never know when they may
    need
    &gt; a
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; break.
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt;
    &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; &gt; Always drive safely
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<br /><br />God Bless the USA!!!!<br />~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

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