Follow us on...
Follow us on Twitter Follow us on Facebook Watch us on YouTube
Register
Results 1 to 6 of 6

Thread: GOD's Diet...

  1. #1
    Good Enough
    Join Date
    02.13.02
    Location
    LB
    Posts
    1,547
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning 5150
    Favorite VH Song

    Mean Street / Love Walks In
    Last Online

    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    And God populated the earth with broccoli and
    cauliflower and spinach and green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would
    live long and healthy lives.

    And Satan created McDonald's.

    And McDonald's brought forth the 99-cent double-
    cheeseburger.

    And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with that?"

    And Man said, "Super size them."

    And Man gained pounds.

    And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman
    might keep her figure that man found so fair.

    And Satan froze the yogurt, and he brought forth
    chocolate, nuts and brightly colored sprinkle candy to put on the yogurt.

    And woman gained pounds.

    And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."

    And Satan brought forth creamy dressings, bacon bits, and shredded cheese.

    And there was ice cream for dessert.

    And woman gained pounds.

    And God said, "I have sent your heart healthy
    vegetables and olive oil with which to cook them."

    And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak from
    Cracker Barrel so big it needed its own platter.

    And Man gained pounds, and his bad cholesterol went through the roof.

    And God brought forth running shoes, and Man resolved to lose those extra pounds.

    And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2.

    And Man gained pounds.

    And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil."

    And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable
    naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.

    And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour cream dip
    also.

    And Man clutched his remote control and ate the
    potato chips swaddled in cholesterol.

    And Satan saw and said, "It is good."

    And Man went into cardiac arrest.

    And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

    ... And Satan created HMOs.

    Email from a friend.. (Yes Trip the Budweiser one) Considering I work for an HMO I didn't find it very funny... [img]graemlins/irked.gif[/img]
    <a href="http://www.vhwalkathon.org" target="_blank">VHWalkathon - Project 316</a><br /><br />EVH: The music is first and foremost. That's the way it's always been and that's the way it will always be. Because without the music, what is there? Nothing. There's nothing without the music. You can't even cop an attitude without the music (laughs).

  2. #2
    Eruption BigBadBrian's Avatar
    Join Date
    04.27.00
    Age
    53
    Location
    A Fat City Address on Mean Street
    Posts
    1,402
    Favorite VH Album

    VH II
    Favorite VH Song

    Any Song Hagar Doesn't Sing
    Last Online

    08.12.10 @ 07:15 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    So true!
    "Tardy? I don't feel tardy!"

    "I won't go down in history, but I will go down on your sister!" - DLR

    Pride and Glory - the Packer Story!

  3. #3
    Eruption
    Join Date
    12.27.01
    Location
    NEW YAWK CITAY
    Posts
    763
    Favorite VH Album

    fair warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Bottoms Up
    Last Online

    01.23.09 @ 11:26 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Hmmmmm.. Lunch time here in NYC... Salad.. or POPEYES??
    Plstrcast everywhere else, Smudge NYC here.. so kiss my arse!<br /><br /><a href="http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/smudgenyc" target="_blank">http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/smudgenyc</a>

  4. #4
    Damage your reputation seenbad's Avatar
    Join Date
    02.24.00
    Age
    45
    Location
    Portland Oregon
    Posts
    26,946
    Favorite VH Album

    Halen 1
    Favorite VH Song

    I'm the one
    Last Online

    11.30.17 @ 06:15 PM
    Likes
    73
    Liked 257 Times in 92 Posts


    Donor

    Well, if you have an HMO, I'd opt with Salad smudge.

    sheepa latta peepah dabba looka foh a moopy

    Gunter glieben glauchen globen

  5. #5
    Good Enough
    Join Date
    02.13.02
    Location
    LB
    Posts
    1,547
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning 5150
    Favorite VH Song

    Mean Street / Love Walks In
    Last Online

    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Better lay of the Twinkies as well...
    <a href="http://www.vhwalkathon.org" target="_blank">VHWalkathon - Project 316</a><br /><br />EVH: The music is first and foremost. That's the way it's always been and that's the way it will always be. Because without the music, what is there? Nothing. There's nothing without the music. You can't even cop an attitude without the music (laughs).

  6. #6
    Eruption
    Join Date
    12.27.01
    Location
    NEW YAWK CITAY
    Posts
    763
    Favorite VH Album

    fair warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Bottoms Up
    Last Online

    01.23.09 @ 11:26 AM
    Likes
    0
    Liked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Originally posted by Fabulous Shadow aka VHL:
    Better lay of the Twinkies as well...
    bight my Yodel! [img]graemlins/bounce.gif[/img]
    Plstrcast everywhere else, Smudge NYC here.. so kiss my arse!<br /><br /><a href="http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/smudgenyc" target="_blank">http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/smudgenyc</a>

 

 

Similar Threads

  1. Atkins diet
    By Panama Dog in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 73
    Last Post: 03.23.09, 03:19 PM
  2. Friendly Advice From A Fat Guy On A Diet.
    By Axxman300 in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 32
    Last Post: 05.31.06, 02:10 PM
  3. Robertson Links Sharon Stroke, God's Wrath
    By LLFHS in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 24
    Last Post: 05.18.06, 03:57 PM
  4. Robertson warns Pennsylvania voters of God's wrath
    By a.f.u. for vh in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 11.12.05, 10:19 PM
  5. God's Laws and how to follow them...
    By voivod in forum VH Fans Meeting Place (Non-Music)
    Replies: 146
    Last Post: 05.25.05, 08:18 PM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •