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  1. #1
    Eruption
    Join Date
    01.15.02
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    Light industrial complex on Eastern Seaboard
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    06.08.07 @ 12:27 PM
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    after consulting my spirit guides, oracles of events past and present, i have some predictions for the Van Halen family in the coming year:

    ED: drives his golf cart into the ocean during a drunken fit of rage after shanking a drive on the fifth hole at Pebble Beach. vows to take more golf lessons and keep boozing.

    ALEX: arrested for attempting to solicit sex from a mail box at the corner of Hollywood and Vine. escapes after chewing his way through his handcuffs and is still at large.

    MIKE: dies choking on a nacho chip while watching the Raiders lose in overtime. last thoughts are, "i love you sammy... i've always loved you"

    SAMMY: forsakes the music business and joins the circus, dresses like a clown and travels with a bald-headed black guy, a 6 foot-200 lb dyke and... hey, wait a minute! that sounds a lot like 2002.

    VAL: divorces ed and sues him for 50% of all the van halen royalties. shockingly, divorce court papers reveal val is the musical genius of the familiy and wrote all of ed's music--even the cello stuff.

    WOLFGANG: divorce court papers also reveal that 'wolfie' is not their son. he's actually a reses monkey that wears children's clothes. Peavey drops the Wolgang guitar line.

    DAVE: in perhaps the strangest twist of all... david lee roth, after shedding his hair piece, admits he's really... ben kingsley. the 'david lee roth' persona is ben's alter-ego.

  2. #2
    Eruption Red-Diamond's Avatar
    Join Date
    04.06.02
    Age
    32
    Location
    L.A. (Cabo in my mind)
    Posts
    1,155
    Favorite VH Album

    1984, Balance, Van Halen, 5150
    Favorite VH Song

    Mike on SGMAD, Baluchetherium
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    02.12.07 @ 03:44 PM
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    Your Alex thing was funny dude, Mikes too! [img]graemlins/bounce.gif[/img]
    How to make a “Mad Anthony”

    2 oz Cabo Wabo® Tequila
    1 oz Spicy V8
    Juice from a fresh Lime
    A generous dollop of Mad Anthony’s Hot Sauce
    Combine in a shaker full of ice and shake it up
    Pour into shot glass garnished with
    a dab of salt
    a small slice of lime
    a slice of Serrano or Jalapeno chili pepper

  3. #3
    Romeo Delight
    Join Date
    09.12.02
    Age
    49
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    good ole\' USof A!
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    107
    Favorite VH Album

    Fair Warning
    Favorite VH Song

    Hear about it Later
    Last Online

    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
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    LMOA!! [img]graemlins/thumb.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/thumb.gif[/img]

    Now that is about as accurate as it has gotten! But since we have heard, well, nothing at all, I will be not so quick to doubt anything at this point.
    DDLR WEBMASTER<br /><a href="http://www.diamonddavidleeroth.com" target="_blank">www.diamonddavidleeroth.com</a><br /><br />Also check out <a href="http://www.rayluzier.com" target="_blank">www.rayluzier.com</a> for all DLR BAND updates

 

 

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