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  1. #1
    Unchained rxman's Avatar
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    02.19.12 @ 01:38 PM
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    Donor

    So I was strolling through a bookstore the other day and this book caught my eye so I bought it. For anyone who grew up on the 80's metal scene, this is the book for you. It's called, "Fargo Rock City, A Heavy Metal Odyssey in Rural North Dakota. The writer is Chuck Klosterman. It's basically just his thoughts and experiences while growing up during the metal heyday of the 80's. Check it out, it's pretty hilarious.

    Here are some excerpts from the book in a chapter dealing with Van Halen.


    ........In a now ancient MTV special about hair bands, Kurt Loder credits Van Halen with introducing a "faster, less heavy" version of metal that pulled it out of the underground........Edward's pyrotechnic fret hammering splintered the stereotype of who listened to heavy metal. He gave hard rock musical credibility. He made college girls like it, because you could certainly shake your ass to all the good Van Halen songs.......but it was still metal. It was long-haired, drunken, show-us-your-tits rock 'n' roll........

    ......Listening to Eric Clapton is like getting a sensual massage from a woman you've loved for the past ten years; listening to Van Halen is like having the best sex of your life with three foxy nursing students you met at a Tastee Freez. This is why rock historians and intellectuals feel comfortable lionizing Eric Clapton, even though every credible guy in the world will play Van Halen tapes when his wife isn't around.......

    .....Alot of that credit must go to David Lee Roth. Roth is not exactly a "musician", but he always understood the bottom line. If Eddie had decided to become Pete Townsend, David Lee Roth would never have become David Lee Roth. And---as is so often the case--one's man's selfishness ultimately worked to the benefit of everybody. Roth demanded that Van Halen had to be about a lifestyle, specifically his lifestyle (or even more specifically, a lifestyle where you tried to have sex with anything in heels). Philosophically, his sophmoric antics limited Eddie. Mr Van Halen really couldn't develop his classical virtuosity when his frontman was trying to hump the mic stand and scream like Tarzan. But in tangible terms, it made Eddie better. Instead of an artist tryng to make art, Eddie was forced to become an artist trying to make noise-and the end result was stunning.........

    .....Marc Bolan know how glam rock was supposed to look, but Eddie Van Halen invented how it was supposed to sound.....

    .....And for those of you who actually care which of these people is the better player, the answer is Hendix. Van Halen remains the most influential guitar player of all time, but only because nobody can figure out how to rip Hendrix off........

    [ June 06, 2001 at 12:06 AM: Message edited by: rxman ]
    "The sound of Van Halen was meant to spill out, all over your stereo and ruin the rest of your record collection "...David Lee Roth

    Check out one of the best bands to come out of Arizona. Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers. www.rogerclyne.net

  2. #2
    Beloved Glenn's Avatar
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    02.13.15 @ 08:56 AM
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    Donor

    <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by rxman:
    listening to Van Halen is like having the best sex of your life with three foxy nursing students <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Could we please have a moment of silence for those of us who'll never know if this is in fact true. [img]smilies/cry.gif[/img]

    [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

  3. #3
    The Dude Dan Halen's Avatar
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    09.26.07 @ 02:38 PM
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    Donor

    <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by rxman:
    .....And for those of you who actually care which of these people is the better player, the answer is Hendix. Van Halen remains the most influential guitar player of all time, but only because nobody can figure out how to rip Hendrix off.......<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    That is so true.
    "It's so damn hot... milk was a bad choice." --Ron Burgundy, Anchorman

  4. #4
    Good Enough
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    12.31.69 @ 04:00 PM
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    Nobody could rip off Hendrix because he improvised in making a lot of noise. If your goal was to make noise, you would try to rip off Hendrix. If you wanted to play guitar, you would rip off Eddie. Klosterman is another example of how baby boomer's ram the aura of Hendrix down your throat because he represented a time of anarchy, drugs, and self expression.

    Did he invent distortion?
    Did he invent the Wah?
    Did he invent feedback?

    If you said "no" to all three, you are correct. I am not sold for a second on Jimi. Had he still been alive, Eddie would be doing the same thing he is doing to him today:

    Outselling him
    influencing more guitar players then him
    inventing more guitar techniques then him
    charting more songs then him


    Lets cut through the "would of", "could of" "should of" crap and talk about what we know as facts. Eddie dusted Jimi decades ago!

  5. #5
    Eruption Icecream-man's Avatar
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    12.13.17 @ 02:58 AM
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    Klosterman writes for the Akron Beacon Journal, i haven't picked up his book yet but i heard it was really good. Praised by the likes of Stephen King, and reviewed in the New York Times...not bad for resident of Crackron...er Arkon

    this just makes me long for a new VH cd even more...

    Late.
    Kosovo Je Srbija

  6. #6
    Unchained rxman's Avatar
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    02.19.12 @ 01:38 PM
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    Donor

    <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Georgie:
    Nobody could rip off Hendrix because he improvised in making a lot of noise. If your goal was to make noise, you would try to rip off Hendrix. If you wanted to play guitar, you would rip off Eddie. Klosterman is another example of how baby boomer's ram the aura of Hendrix down your throat because he represented a time of anarchy, drugs, and self expression.

    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    Easy Georgie......

    Anyway......the book is quite hilarious. The more I read the book, the more the Van Halen references pop up. I will try to post some more when I get time.

    [ June 07, 2001 at 05:30 PM: Message edited by: rxman ]
    "The sound of Van Halen was meant to spill out, all over your stereo and ruin the rest of your record collection "...David Lee Roth

    Check out one of the best bands to come out of Arizona. Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers. www.rogerclyne.net

 

 

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